What an awesome day!

Look what I did! Look what I did!!
I'm too lazy to put these in order but, you get the point. I wish I had brought my camera with me in the raft but I don't regret it that much since we ended up flipping ourselves over:o) Words can't even describe the beauty I saw today. This little pool was the only place dry enough to allow a camera.




I saw somethin' sneakin' around trying to soak up some sun. So I decided to climb around for a closer look.

I don't remember the exact name of this snake but I recognized him as a non-poisonous one. So I tried to make friends. He ignored me.


This little fish didn't ignore me though.



This limestone rock is of no significance but I just thought it looked interesting.


This tall tree breaks my heart.....in the good way.







I can't wait to come back to this place.

I feel cheap

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Somehow I thought I would be worth more than that. Damn.

Come to think of it, this thing is shocking isn't it? I stole this from a past post of Lollie's Follies. She's doesn't know me from Ann Landers but I don't discriminate in my thieving....

Stress?

I took Peanut to his doctor Saturday morning. I've mentioned here before about his many surgeries to remove infectious glands from his, ahem, butt. It's taking forever for him to fully heal. He's been on and off antibiotics and steroids for months now. It's the same thing, over and over. For about a week he'll start to look better back there and then all of a sudden, he's swollen and in pain again. He was just there last week when they told me not to worry about him, just continue with his meds and he'll be fine. Saturday, I couldn't take it anymore, I can tell he's really uncomfortable and he's still having a hard time going. One of his doctors said he's probably stressed out. I said,"HUH?!!" I thought he was joking at first.


Does this dog look stressed out to you? If this is stressed out I'd like to see what relaxed is then.

Happy Birthday to meeee!

I live in a treeeee.

Ok I don't live in a tree, I just started singing that on my birthday when I was 5, like all 5 year olds did. Only I never stopped.



This picture has nothing to do with my birthday, I'm just sick of that old profile pic and this was the only way I knew how to change it. Thanks for all the birthday wishes!!

Where the hell am I?

-Under the weather. That's where I've been. I'm exhausted today but feeling better. It's going to take forever to catch up with everyone again. But I will.

- Yesterday was awful just awful. Nothing went right. But it's ok, it could have been worse. Plus it ended well.

-I had a doctor appointment on Wednesday and blood work done. She told me I have to do another radio-iodine pill with body scan in November. The cherry on top is the thyrogen INJECTIONS(my favorite word) two days in a row before the radiation. Nice. It's going to be so much fun.(can you hear the sarcasm or am I just always like that?) It's either that or go off medication for four weeks and suffer the low hormone levels like last time and I. AM. NOT. DOING. THAT. EVER. AGAIN. So I don't care how much those infernal injections hurt or how much they cost. Bring on those damn needles, dammit. She said I couldn't even think about even talking about having a baby for another year possibly two, maybe not all, we'll have to 'discuss' it later. That was the best news ever.(do ya hear it again, this is so not like me I think, what happened to the sweet soft girl I used to know?) Not that I was jumping to have one.... but still, it sucks to have someone say don't. I'll get over it tomorrow. Oh and I gained two pounds. I'll get over that tomorrow too. Ok I didn't really care about the two pounds anyway, I just wanted to test if you were paying attention.

-In spite of it all. Out of all the scary cancers I could have had, this is the one I would have chosen if I were forced to choose. Which I wasn't, so kind of it's pointless to say so. But it's true. Just ask anyone with breast or lung cancer if they'd like to trade places with me and they would, so I really shouldn't be complaining. It's actually curable and fairly easy to cure. I'm supposed to be considered cured but there might have been some left over from the first radiation. My treatments at this points are 'just in case' follow ups and probably overkill. I didn't have to lose my hair or do any of those scary chemo treatments. So I'll stop complaining about it then.


-On the bright side, since I can't have a baby, I'll have plenty enough time to go back to school then. I still want to be a kindergarten teacher. I thought I couldn't because of my voice, but it came back. I'll never complain about my voice again. I also have the ok to travel if I want to. My best friend from a gazillion miles away will be visiting with her daughter too. There, I'm feeling better already.

-Do I have any readers left? Leave me a comment if you still love me. That means you too my lovely lurk friends. And anyway my birthday is tomorrow.

Can't We All Just Get Along?

Why, yes we can.

A post by the elusive Mr.Pea himself

I want to set the record straight

Ms.Pea has no cellulite and I built the sand levee by myself.

Meme-tastic as I promised!

MEME #1

I got tagged by the great Ms.Heartinsanfrancisco herself to list 5 ways I raise my vibrations:

1. Of course music. If I could surgically attach my ipod to my ears, I probably would. I don't really have a preference of any kind, just whatever sounds good. Norah Jones is a staple and there's a song by Stevie Nicks that describes exactly the 'place' I 'was' while I was under anesthesia and who I was with. I heard it about a week after my surgery, fell to my knees and cried for some reason. I'm not opposed to filthy hiphop, although lately it seems a little juvenile and repetitive(like that stupid,"Pop,Lock, and Drop it-so annoying-and if I hear that idiotic song about lipgloss just once more, I might just cut my ears out)but every once in a while I'll hear something I like. I like everything though.

2. Art. Looking at, reading about, or creating it. I paint some. And I was into pottery and sculpture for a little while but I don't have a kiln so I stopped for now. I don't paint as much as I used to but it's still something I'm fairly good at doing.

3. Read. This a given. I like everything as far as reading goes too.

4. The sea...oh the sea. I ride my bike to the beach often to look for shark teeth or to just be. Sometimes I'm the only around(since it's still a secret beach) so I will sing at the top of my lungs.

5. Speaking of singing, I love to sing. I sing all the time. I sing in the shower, in the kitchen, in the car, at the beach(see above), while I'm walking my dog, etc,etc....This does not mean that I can sing good. I can sort of hold a tune. But since my surgery last year, I'm a little husky now. I probably should have lumped this with number 1 but I'm too lazy to edit. Ok I'll just add one more then: Walking Peanut. We have all sorts of adventures together and we've been just about everywhere(how do you think I found the secret beach?) Walking always clears my mind and I get my best ideas then.


So there it is. I'm supposed to tag 5 people but I'll just tag whoever wants to.

MEME #2


Ms.EllieBee who was also was kind enough to tag me for this AND a Rockin Girl Blogger Award(woot!) that I still never passed on to anyone, the ungrateful, lazy bitch that I am(wherein lies your cue,dear readers, to say in your most shocked voice,OH no! You're the nicest, sweetest person the world Angel!) But, honestly, I have the utmost admiration for everyone I visit and I hate to just nominate only five so it would take a week to cut and paste everyone's link that I read.....plus I lurk in a few places too where I'm too shy to comment just now.


1. Who was your best friend?

W. I can't write her name because she's still my best friend and I want to respect her privacy. I've known her since we were 8. I hung out with Sarah a lot too and the last I heard she married an ex-con. This is true, I met him before, he's an asshole as well as an ex-con. I haven't seen her in 10-11 years.

2. What sports did you play?

Sports? Cheerleading and gymnastics. Some people don't consider it a sport and I sort of agree even though I had some injuries to prove it. But here's the truth: basically it's an excuse to put a cute little outfit to prounce around in, in front of the whole school, most of whom will think you're either adorable or a complete, conceited bitch(and they were trust me). There are a few girls who take it REALLY SERIOUSLY as an artform. But I was not one of them-they got on my nerves. It got really old and I quit 2 months before graduation because I thought it was sexist, stupid and childish-yeah it took me years to figure that out. If not for upsetting my parents(because it cost so much and they were so proud of me) and Sarah-who quit with me-I would've quit earlier, I hated it that much. This is a really embarrassing fact that my husband will find any excuse to tell everyone. I did love gymnastics though so I was proud of that. I guess it could have been worse. It was a cute outfit.

3. What kind of car did you drive?

I didn't. Nobody bothered to teach me to drive so I didn't.

4. It’s Friday night, where were you?

Football game(see #2) or out doing stuff I shouldn't be doing.

5. Were you a party animal?

Not too much. The normal teenage thing. I was home by curfew-my parents were my prison guards they were so strict.

6. Were you considered a flirt?

I don't know. Probably. But not the obnoxious kind. I guess I still am. But not like that. I tease people a lot which I guess is a form a flirting, it's just not a sexual way-that's what I mean by obnoxious.

7. Were you in band, orchestra, or choir?

No, like I said I can't sing that well. I wish though. I tried out for orchestra but I failed the test.

8. Were you a nerd?

Probably. An art club nerd with my nose in a book all the time.

9. Did you get suspended/expelled?

Yes. Once in 6th grade for throwing candy on the bus. Once in 8 grade for mouthing off to my Science teacher. (he was a pervert and a jerk-nobody believed me) I also got caught skipping to go to the beach since my school was 2 blocks away from the damn beach.

10. Can you sing the fight song?

OMG yes, how dorky does that make me?

11. Who was your favorite teacher?

Mr. Beddard my junior high art teacher. He died of AIDS in 1992, it was awful. I had a lot of good teachers though, he was just special. The one everyone liked.

12. School mascot?

Senators. What a dumb mascot. My school was named after one-go figure.

13. Did you go to Prom?

Yes, just once. My boyfriend was a complete jerk and so was our double date. They fought the entire time.

14. If you could go back and do it over, would you?

Only if I HAD to. But NOOO not by choice.

15. What do you remember most about graduation?

That our valedictorian screwed up her speech ever but I congratulated her anyway because she was so nice. And that the key note speaker was my friend's dad. It was the happiest day of my life because I hated school.

16. Where were you on senior skip day?

At the beach.

17. Did you have a job your senior year?

No. My parents never let me get a job.

18. Where did you go most often for lunch?

To the beach or in the art room, painting.

19. Have you gained weight since then?

I gained 15 pounds-I was underweight so it's a good 15 pounds.

20. What did you do after graduation?

school, work, moved out, got married

21. Who was your Senior prom date?

I won't say. He was complete jerk, that's all I need to say.

23. Are you going / did you go to your 10 year reunion?

No. I have zero desire to see any of those people. I run into someone from time and time though.


24. Who was your home room teacher?

Don't remember.

25. Who will repost this after you?

Probably no one because this post is the longest post EVER. Plus everyone been tagged with it already.

Tomorow and tomorow and tomorow

I had a couple memes I promised I would complete tonight but I have to wait until tomorow. I haven't been feeling well or sleeping well the past couple days. So I only have 2 or 3 minutes before I fall into a sweet coma-like sleep of the century. I just wanted to say thanks for all the encouragement today because I was feeling pretty crappy and a little guilty. The worst thing in the world a person can do to me is hurt my feelings and I hate when I know I've done that to someone I love no matter how good the intentions were.

Letter to a loved one

Dear loved one who got angry and hung up on me this morning,
I'm sorry I hurt your feelings. I don't even know if you read here anymore or at all but I love you very much and pray every night for you and your children's health, safety and happiness. I'm not trying to be right, I'm trying to be honest with you. I sometimes feel like I am the only person in your life who loves you enough to BE honest with you and I'm NOT going to apologise for that. Everyone else just ignores it because they are afraid to have to deal with your temper. I told you that you were an angry person so in your rage(because I was SO WRONG), you screamed at me then hung up on me. I'm not going to go into how I don't deserve to be treated this way,blah,blah,blah. I don't even care about that. I'm so sorry that you have had a shitty time of life. I am. I was there too, I saw it all you know. But if you don't try to let go of all the anger and feelings of being the victim, you're going to bury yourself in it. You think I don't know you by now? I've known you all my life. I know that when you feel vulnerable, you use your anger to guard your broken heart so that no one can hurt you anymore. I know that besides me,T, and Neenee, the only people who ever truly loved you just as you are, are dead and gone. We mourned them just as much for your loss as we did ours. We loved them even more because of their love and hopes for you. But we're still here, hoping for you. You don't think it kills us to see you struggle this way? Stop being a victim. Stop blaming other people for your misfortunes. Take responsibility for your mistakes and bad decisions and let go of the shitty past. Own your part in this, nobody is innocent including you-including me! Letting go doesn't mean you're saying, it's ok what you guys did to me. It just means changing what's in your heart so you can give your children the best of yourself. It's about getting closure so that your anger will stop affecting your life. I have always been your advocate and always will be even if what I said to you means you will never speak to me again. Everything you say is true. EVERYTHING. You had every right to be pissed off all this time! You got the shittiest hand ever dealt. This doesn't mean you have to continue playing it though. We can't force those who hurt us to change but WE can change. It's not healthy to keep this sick cycle going. I'm not going to participate in it anymore. Stop it. These are the things everyone wants to say to you but doesn't. I'm not going to give you any more unasked for advice but I'm not going to lie to you either. I'm proud of you for all that you've been strong enough to get through. And I'm waiting for the 'you' that I know to come home.

My birthday's coming

My birthday is on the 21st. I'm turning 31. I'm not the sort to lie about my age, I know people who started saying they were 27 or 28 when they hit 30(and are still doing it-you know who you are!), but I just don't see the point. I think it's a little pathetic and continues that absurd idea that it's actually (gasp!) abnormal to get older(gasp!gasp!). That part of our culture that tells us we have to perpetually stay 19 never made any sense to me-even when I was 19. I can understand the need to take care of our bodies and want to look our best but I don't want to be a teenager in my 30s. I'm getting off the topic though.

Since my birthday is coming up I took out my diary from last year so I could read what I wrote on my 30th birthday. It wasn't a particularly interesting entry so I skipped a couple pages and found something that made me laugh so hard, milk from my cereal flew out of my nose. Especially since I've been lecturing my sister about how she shouldn't be so obsessed with feeling bad about her body and how society's image of beauty disgusts me. I went on and on about how we should love ourselves, and celebrate how different we are and exercise should be for health not to fit into a size double zero pair of jeans:

Monday-July 30,2006-11:35pm

It's official. I have cellulite. I saw it today. It's ok. It's not that bad. But it sort of happened over night-that's the only reason I feel just a little disturbed about it. I was sort of freaked out about it so I had to call W(my best friend since 3rd grade) and tell her about it. She laughed at me and said welcome to the club. It's just that it caught me by such surprise. If it had started in my teens like everyone else I know, it wouldn't have been such a shock and I would just be used to it by now. But......ok, I've accepted it. I'm at peace with my cellulite and now I can move on.

Aimless and Random

-There's something amazing about a chubby,water-wrinkled miniature hand, clutching my own because owner of hand is afraid of the dark, water park pirate ship and needed someone to accompany him. Especially since 4 year old owner of hand just bragged about how he's not afraid of anything in the whole world, not even sharks or monsters.

-Speaking of water parks, I had to scream at some people who appeared to be 20somethings, but were probably teens, I can never tell. Basically they were old enough to know better and frankly too old to be in the little kids section anyway. They were climbing down some watery, pirate treasure stairs the same time me and my chubby handed little friend were and they were pushing against us so aggressively in their hurry and excitement, my nephew slipped and fell. I'm not an assertive person.... still though. I yelled,"Excuse me, there's a 4 year old child here!" Not that it mattered, I wasn't born on this Earth to teach anyone how to behave and when I was that age, anyone over 18 was lame. And anyway I forgive them, we all act like idiots in those kinds of places. You really have to LOVE your kids a bunch to bring them to any kind of amusement park. I'd rather stick my fingers into light sockets than hang out there but, it's for the kids, how can I refuse?

-My house is a complete disaster. Someone must have snuck into my fridge and ate my cold KitKat dammit. There's string cheese wrappers in corners I didn't even know existed, cookie crumbs under the dining table, chocolate finger prints on my outdoor cushions and any minute now, the pile of dirty beach towels in the laundry room is probably going to come alive and start walking around. There's really no point in telling anyone about this. It just makes me feel better to write it down since I'm too lazy to clean but not too lazy to walk to the store to buy some more KitKat.

-Peanut was NOT a good boy. I'm pretty sure if I could have heard his thoughts it would have gone something like this: "Great! Someone close to my size! I should hump it!"....." Great! Someone close to my size! It's going to be so fun and easy to steal food from it."....."Great! Someone close to my size! I'm going to use it to distract Angel so I can run out the door when they try to leave!"......"Yes! The little ones move around a lot! I'll use them to show off my herding skills!"..... "Who's dropping all these crumbs on the floor? I love you. When Angel's not looking I'm going to jump onto your lap and scare the hell out of you, so when you start screaming I'll steal the rest of your sandwich."....."Why did Angel lock me in the bedroom again? It can't be because I was humping everyone, they want me, they just don't know it yet. They say no but they mean yesssss." I do love an unruly dog, I truly do. He's a little sad and lonely today so I thought we would go for a long walk after lunch.

-Being around my sisters' kids sometimes make me wish I had a chubby-handed little one of my own. But don't tell Peanut lest he think I love him less.

I have been a neglectful blogstress

These photos are my excuse. But I don't feel the least bit of guilt over it.

I love summer

And yes that is blue nail polish on my toes.

I didn't disappear

I'm not going to say I've been busy. I hate when people say that as in, "Sorry I haven't called/came by. I've been busy." No matter how sweetly or honestly intended someone says that, it just always sounds like,"I've been too busy for you." So I haven't been busy, I've been running a mile a minute with my sister and nephews. The past few days have been a blur of sun, wind, water splashing, water parks, water in my eyes, Peanut, pools, sunscreen, the ocean, little boys running around yelling "Auntie, watch this! Auntie can you fix this? Auntie look! Auntie guess what! Auntie I caught a lizard! " Good times. I say this with all affection and honesty, anyone who is brave enough to have more than one kid should be awarded sainthood right now. They're here for another week so I imagine my posts and visits will continue to be sporadic until then. I only get to see them once a year since she lives a gazillion miles away so we've all been pretty much joined at the hip.

*Miss Ellie bee has honored me with a rockin female blogger award! YAY! Thank you! I have to wait until I have more than a minute to myself to pass it on. Hope everyone has been having as much fun as I have this weekend.

(Don't) Take me out to the ball game

I'm not a huge fan of sporting events. If I go to a game, I usually have a good time but it's not an activity I would seek out if I didn't have a husband who enjoyed them. Last week I was lucky enough to attend a rained out baseball game.

Nice view. Good seats. I was a good sport. Really, I was. The things I do for my husband... really.
We kept thinking the rain would pass over and the sky would clear up. For about 45 minutes it did stop raining but it took them so long to prepare the field, the rain started up again by the time they were finished and ready begin the game.
Whoever bought tickets for the seats under this leak had a wife who, I'm sure was as unhappy as I was just by the look on her face. The announcer said," A bad day at the ballpark is better than a good day at work," and everyone cheered. I looked at the poor woman and we shared a smartass smile because I know we were both thinking,"F- this, I'd rather be at work!" We sat there for about 2 hours before we(I) got sick of it and decided to leave. The game was canceled shortly after we left which just so happened to be the same time as the afternoon traffic rush. Fun. I do love rain though just not baseball. Or ballpark food.

The effect I have on boys

Yep.

Something Sunnier

I don't have time to post or blogvisit but I hated that my last post was so dark. So here are a couple happier pix. I bought this hibiscus plant half dead at the grocery store for practically nothing not even knowing what color the flowers would be and look! A pretty dark peach with a pink center. It didn't really need much nursing, just some morning sun and water.
This one is for Hel, since she's experiencing winter on the other side of the equator . Wishing you a bit of summer!

I'm having so much fun with my nephews. I don't get to see them as often as I'd like to so we're really making the most of it. Oooh they wear me out! In a good way. More pictures later. Hope everyone is a having a beautiful weekend.

Public Service Announcements

Rats! Alcohol kills. Stay away from alcohol. Oh and stay away from rats.



WTF is up with this guy? I don't even know what to say.......Don't be like this guy.


I've been lazy with my posts lately-including this one. Only because my sister is here visiting with her 3 boys(!) I'm trying to catch up with my blog visits too.

Wanna hear something really creepy? The anesthesiologist present during my surgery last September was found dead in his home with his wife this week. The police reported that it was a murder suicide-he was the murderer, suicide-r. (or is it suicidee-I'm not making jokes, honestly I don't know the correct word.) They were newlyweds too. It's still new so I don't know anything else but it's scary and very sad. He seemed like a nice man and was very kind to me. He had a very soothing presence and I still remember hearing his voice while I was under the meds. This had me and Mr.Pea talking about what could possibly make someone snap? Someone with a good job, beautiful spouse, nice home, what appears to be a wonderful life. I've been livid at my husband before but at no point have I ever felt like shooting him....or myself.

Cat has a taste for rabbit

I'm not quite sure how to feel about this? Thoughts?

Feeling Random

-I miss coffee. I haven't had a drop in over a month. I only started drinking coffee a couple years ago when my in-laws came to visit and I had to get a coffeemaker for the visit. It was an instant addiction. I always quit when summer starts because I get nauseous just thinking about having a hot drink when it's 90 degrees out and I hate cold coffee drinks. This does not mean that I yearn for winter, I hate winter. It just means that I drink a lot of sun tea.

-I like bumblebees. I prefer them to regular bees. Why? Because they don't sting and they're fat. The fact that they're fat makes them cuter. Honeybees get all the glory because, well, honey is awesome on fresh biscuits and bumblebees are kind of big and scary. Sometimes, when I'm out walking, they bump into my head. But still, they're pretty cute.

-There's a small bat that flies through our breezeway everyday at dusk looking for bugs. I'm scared to death of it. I swear the noise it makes sounds like a baby saying,"Rabies, Rabies!"

-I'm also afraid of vultures. There are a few that roost in the trees near my building. I was walking Peanut one day and looked up and there they were. In the branches watching me silently with their beady eyes, 3 of them almost the same damn size as me. I always envision them grabbing me by my ponytail and flying away to poke my eyeballs out.

-I started jogging again. There's a few men that jog in the fitness room at the same time I do and I feel like such a badass because I always outrun them. A couple of them are senior citizens so I really shouldn't get so uppity.

Folk Groupie?Me? I would have never thought

One of my favorite memories as a kid is being in the backseat of my Grandparents' car while they were driving me to Dairy Queen. This memory sticks out because there are four kids in my family and I have tons of cousins there so whenever I was visiting, we were always all together but this time I was alone with them. I was about 8 or 9 and we were driving down the hilly, winding road where they lived. It was a beautiful West Virginia summer day and the colors in my memory are yellows and greens. There was a folk song from the 60s on the radio and they were singing it together and I remember being so happy because they were singing. Even though it was the first and only time I had ever heard that song(at the time Madonna was the end all and be all in music for me) I always remembered it because it was such a happy moment for me. Skip 10 years later and one of the women in the group who recorded that song ended up being my neighbor and became one of my closest and dearest friends. She's not one to brag so I knew her for a long time before I even figured it out. Even then I didn't want to come out and say, oh my Grandparents are huge fans! I did end up telling her about that and she was proud that she got to have a small part in one of my favorite moments of my life.


I'll find any excuse to tell everyone who she is because it embarrasses her. (in a good way) One day at Costco I saw a folk music compilation cd and I knew her group would be on it and when we saw the name I got really excited and said, really loud, just to embarass her really good,"Dee, Let's check if your song is on here. Look! It's you! Everyone in the music section stop and observe! This woman's voice is on thishere cd! When you guys go home, you can tell all your friends you had a moment with greatness. This a damn compilation cd, folks, this means it's important. Here she is at the very Costco you shop at buying pretzels!" The whole time she was mortified(in a good way) and trying to run away from me but there were only 3 people there- one looked at me like I was an idiot(which didn't offend me since I was acting like one anyway) and the other two laughed at us. (I do this to everyone. I once ran after my sister at the grocery store yelling,"Hello, you forgot your Preperation H! Don't you need it?"If I were at Costco with one of you, dear readers, I would do it to you-not the Preperation H thing but something more appropriate for the situation, of course. I expect and invite reciprocation, it's funny.)
A few years back, her group had a reunion concert thingy. When she got back, I bothered her and bothered her to let me watch the video because it was going to be on PBS and I wanted to see it first. I had never seen her sing and had only heard a couple songs before. She wasn't really that excited about the whole thing so I had to really pester-something I'm very good at(in a good way). While we were watching it, she told me during one of the songs, for her part, she had to hit a high note. So every time they had to perform that song, she was always a little nervous. And when she would hear a recording of it, she cringed a little just before that high note, even though she knew it was a recording and of course the high note was just right! I have a couple of the group's songs on my ipod, including the high-note song, not because I love it so much but just to have it, you know? The funny thing is today, while I was listening to my ipod, I had it set to shuffle and that very song came on-and right before the high-note, I found myself cringing a little too. In a good way.

Cat Dog Gang War

Bad Engineering

Last weekend, while we were at the beach, we were too lazy to move ourselves away from the rising tide. So we decided to build a levee with our feet. It's a losing battle, we both knew that but we had to try.

Well, Mr.Pea did..... I watched and every now and then offered an enthusiastic,"Good Job Brownie!" and a thumbs up.



For a good 15-20 minutes it worked.

But the moment we noticed a slight breech, we realized it was no use.
It all went downhill from there.

We had no choice but to move! So what's funnier: the fact that we were too lazy to move but not too lazy to build a 'sea wall' or the fact that we actually tried to ward off the Atlantic Ocean with a few handfuls of sand? Or should say footfuls?

I don't have as green a thumb as this post implies

Blondie asked me to post a photo of my orchids so these are for her. I didn't go on a wonderful and exciting odyssey to acquire them as she did for her beautiful orchids. I wish I had. But mine were on sale for $9.99 at the grocery store on a table next to the potatoes. I've never been able to keep moth orchids alive past their bloom but these seem to be doing ok and one of them has started sprouting a new leaf after its bloom finished. I'm sure they have a cool Latin name I can't spell or pronounce but I'm too lazy to look for it so if you know it, feel free to enlighten me.

This one has been blooming for over a month and a half now.



This one had big,beautiful white blooms that lasted about two months. I just cut the stem a few days ago. I was concerned about it for a little while because when I brought it home, the leaves began to turn a little spongy and had a few black, crusty spots that I picked off with some tweezers. But about a week ago I noticed a new leaf that looks healthy so I gave it a little friend to keep it company since it had no more flowers.


While I'm at it, I've also been growing tomatoes on my patio that I refuse to share with anyone since there aren't that many.

I haven't been around the past couple days so it'll take me a while to get caught up with my blog-visiting. Hope everyone is having a good week.

*I just realized that I accidentally had the picture size set to small and now I'm too lazy to go back and fix each one so sorry if it's hard to see.

Don't you wish your pet could talk?

This bird is awesome and you can tell he much he is loved. There were some more cute videos of him if you want more. :o)click here

Why I hate talking on the phone

There's always that one person everyone calls when they feel bad. That person is always me. I feel good that people think of me and look to me for comfort when they're having a hard time. I want to be a comfort for anyone I love. But sometimes it becomes a drain. Especially when it's people who have so many unnecessary problems but don't do anything about it. Especially when it's someone who really doesn't have any problems but is just negative about every thing to the point where you don't even want to be around them. I start to feel like I'm being held hostage on the phone because I can't just say, ok sorry gotta go. Even though, and I feel guilty for admitting this, I don't want to have to sit there and listen for hours. I want to pull the phone out of the wall and throw my cell phone into the sea.


"Hello"


"problem,problem,problem.....misery,misery,misery."

"Really? That's too bad."

"yeah and guess what else, problem, problem,problem, misery, misery."

"Oh. I'm so sorry about that. Have you tried...."

"No because problem,problem,problem...more misery."

"Well I wish things could be better for you."

"Problem."

"Is there something that can be done to solve any of this or at least make you feel better?"

"Well problem,problem,problem,problem,problem. Plus there's misery,misery,misery."

At this point I still care, but I'm sick of it because I don't call people for this. I call to say hi-How are you- I miss you-I love you, not to dump and dump and dump all the negativity in my life on anyone. I have problems too. And when I'm sad or need support I'll say so but I don't use people like emotional landfills. If this were just a once in a while thing, I wouldn't even be complaining about it. It's almost everyday. Like I don't have a life of my own or something else I'd like to be doing than sitting here on the phone listening to problem after problem after problem without even pause to ask how I am. I'm beginning to feel like everyone just thinks,"Oh Angel doesn't work, she has time for all this crap. I'll call her and torture her because no one else wants to hear it. She doesn't mind." I want to be there for a loved one in need. But I don't want to spend my life talking on the damn phone about problems. Saying all this would make me a selfish bitch. This can't be healthy for anyone.

Everyone gets one

I went to the dentist today for my torture,I mean my new filling. It was not even the beginning of the hell that will ensue in the next month or so because I've been told that my wisdom teeth are completely impacted and need to be extracted(it rhymes, what fun!!) as soon as possible. I had no idea I even had wisdom teeth. I thought they were something only people in ancient Egypt got. The best and most exciting part is the part where they tell me I need a specialist because it's possible that he will need to drill into my jawbone because...I missed the rest of the explanation because I stopped listening at this point since the words drill and bone were echoing in my brain. But that's a few weeks away so I'll hide that horror from my self for a little while. I don't want to talk about that, I want to say something else.

Today's post is dedicated to everyone who is brave enough to lay helpless in a chair while someone you barely know puts drills and sharp instruments in your mouth. It really says a lot about a person who can do this without slapping anyone or running out the door to hide in the bushes because I can honestly say, that while I was laying there receiving my wonderful Novocaine injections, those options crossed my mind at least 80 times. And of course I had to have special nerves that are not wired like everyone else in the population so I needed injections in several places. It was fun. Anyway back to my dedication. This trophy is for you and me. My dentist going brothers and sisters! We deserve a damn trophy. We deserve one of those gold stars on our foreheads that tells everyone, I am AWESOME, I rock at the dentist. Because dammit it takes so much f-ing mind over matter to willingly participate in the kind of things they force upon us at the dentist. Today, in LittlePeaville is officially Dental Patient's day. Indulge yourself my fellow tooth&gum conscience friends, you deserve it!
:o)

Ms. Maurey tagged me

I got tagged for this meme the other day but yesterday was my day for penance :o) so here it is today.

INSTRUCTIONS: Remove the blog in the top spot from the following list and bump everyone up one place. Then add your blog to the bottom slot, like so.

1) You da Mom
2) Worker Mommy
3) Whiskeymarie
4) Gettin' It Wrong
5) Little Pea



Next, select five people to tag:

But as always I'm just going to say whoever wants to because I don't like volunteering people for stuff they might not be interested in doing.

What were you doing 10 years ago?
I was a newlywed getting ready to move to Charleston, South Carolina. We ended up only staying for a couple weeks, came back to Fl and spent the summer with my parents until we moved to California.

What were you doing 1 year ago?
I was starting this blog and trying to sign up for classes so I could go back to college and finish. Thyroid cancer canceled out my college plans when fall came but I will finish, dammit!



Five snacks you enjoy:
I rarely snack that much but if I had to choose
1) Quesidillas and salsa
2) Oreo cookies with milk
3) Grilled cheese sandwich with tomato
4) pecans
5) Cool Ranch Doritoes or Cape Cod potato chips

Five songs that you know all the lyrics to:

I sing all the time(that doesn't mean I'm good at it) so I know so many songs by heart. So here are a few I know by heart that I wish I could forget.
1) "Like a virgin" by Madonna, well ok I know by heart just about every song by Madonna. When I was 8, I wanted to be Madonna. Some of her songs are still fun but most of them bore me now.
2)"We are the World" I had to sing that song fifty f-ing times every Tuesday and Thursday in elementary school for music appreciation. I cringe just thinking about that song. There was always that one kid that would request that song for everyone to sing-I hated that kid.
3)"I love you, you love me", by Barney that infernal purple dinosaur. My nephew was about 2 years old when Barney got really popular and drove me asskicking crazy with that song. He was cute though so I put up with it and sang along for him. He turns 18 tomorrow and that makes me feel like an old hag.
4) "Livin' La Vida Loca" by Ricki Martin. I lived near Miami when this song came out and everyone was blasting it from their cars. I hated it the first time I heard it and I hated it the 87,oooth time too. I love Latin music but this was just, no...ok?
5) "Hit me baby one more time" by Britney Spears. Was never a fan of this song either but before XM radio and itunes I had no choice but to suffer through it on the f-ing radio. I'm not a Britney basher, I did enjoy that song "Toxic" and that one she did with Madonna was ok.

Five things you would do if you were a millionaire:
1)Travel of course
2)Buy a home in Hawaii so we could move back there.
3) Buy a basket of puppies(hey it's my millions right?)
4) Start an animal rescue shelter-I guess that's better than buying a basket of pups
5) Take my sisters shoe shopping

Five bad habits:
1) Forgetting people's names 5 seconds after they tell me-really bad! But I don't forget a face.
2) Grooming-I'm not a makeup and hair queen but I have to feel clean and neat not greasy and unibrow-y
3) Telling people what they want to hear instead of my real opinion when asked for advice
4) Procrastination-I hate this habit so much
5) Obsessing over where my keys are and did I forget them or did I forget to lock the door. Hello! Latchkey kid!

Five things you like doing:
1) Walking and biking
2) Outdoor/Beach things(like walking and biking at the beach)
3) Taking pictures
4) Reading
5) Singing/Dancing
I didn't forget shopping-this is a given.

Five things you would never wear again:
1) Anything with pleats or seemed pants
2) Those awful MC Hammer puffy pants-ok I was 12 don't make fun!
3) The color fuchsia
4) Turtle necks-I hate them, they are uncomfortable, if I'm that cold, I can wear a scarf
5) Vests- Ne.Ver.

Five favorite toys:
1) Peanut
2) Ipod
3) Camera
4) Scanner
5) I don't have one yet but my future favorite toy is a photo printer for my camera.

Tuesday Confession once again

Just because I haven't confessed any wrongdoings lately doesn't mean I've not participated in any....

I stole a baby aloe.










Someone in my neighborhood has a really beautiful, healthy aloe plant on their doorstep that I admire every time I walk Peanut. Last week I noticed a bunch of baby shoots coming up on the side of its pot. I knocked on the door to ask for permission to pull one out for myself. No one answered so I just took the smallest one and put it in this mini pot. Am I an asshole?

Hacking ruined my night

Last night MrPea and I went to see Pirates3, well I should say we tried to. When we go to the movies, we try to get there early because my tall,long-legged husband is most comfortable near the aisle. My 4'11" self could care less as long as I have extra butter on my salty as hell popcorn and the people behind me don't put their nasty feet on the back of my chair or next to me. On my way to get said popcorn that costs a damn arm and leg, I stopped by the bathroom and I could hear someone in one of the stalls coughing really loud. I thought to myself," I recognize that cough. I had that cough just weeks ago. Sounds like she's got that never ending dry cough when one gets rid of a nasty flu, poor thing.(Then selfishly)Oh, I hope she's not watching the same movie I am...." Sure enough, when I got back with our munchies MrPea whispered to me(in French so as not to hurt her feelings because we're polite like that),"There's someone sick in here, coughing. Do you want to move?" I don't mean a little, "heff, heff" every five minutes, this women was hacking loudly every 5 seconds. By this time the theatre had filled up so unless we wanted to blind ourselves by sitting in the front row, there was really no where else to go. I said,"Maybe she'll stop."

-15 minutes into the movie I thought to myself,"Surely she'll pop a cough drop or something."
-30 minutes: "Wow she's really hacking it up, surely she figure out it's disturbing and excuse herself. She should see a doctor."
45 minutes: "Great. I'm going to catch her disease."
1 hour: "How rude! She has to know how distracting this is. She should really leave! If I hear her cough one more time I'm going to strangle myself. I don't even know what the hell is going on this movie because I can't hear a damn word over her infernal effing coughing!"

We weren't the only ones who were annoyed. I saw more than a few people turn around in the dark to see who it was and heard people whispering things they wish would happen to that woman that I won't repeat here. Finally we looked at each other, shrugged our shoulders and just left. I guess most people would have said something or complained to the manager but really what good would it have done? We probably should have just left right away and came back another time or tried to trade our tickets for a later showing but, naively, I always believe the best in people. That really, most people are polite and care about whether or not they are ruining someone else's good time. I truly believed that she would figure out her coughing was disturbing everyone and excuse herself because that's what a polite person would do. That woman had to know that her coughing was ruining the movie for just about everyone in that theatre. Actually she knew and she didn't care otherwise she would not have went to the movies in the first place. I get disgusted by that kind of attitude:"Well I'm having a good time, screw everyone else!" When I'm sick,which, if you've been reading here a while, is often, I quarantine myself because 1.nobody wants my sick germs 2.the coughing and sniffling is gross and rude 3.my grandma taught me good manners dammit!

But anyway.....I got over it.

We went to get some hot wings since it was still a nice night and I didn't really feel like going home yet. I wasn't very hungry so I just ordered some squash and had a couple of MrPea's wings. Big mistake(the squash not the wings) because at 3 in the morning I woke feeling soooo nauseous and crawled to the bathroom to do some hacking of my own.(sorry if I grossed you out) Food poison, my favorite. I even fainted in the hallway as a cherry on top. I'm not sure how long I lay there, wondering if I should curse the restaurant where we ate or the hooping cough disease infested, germ spreading, Johnny Depp movie ruining bitch!(and you know how I feel about Johnny) After a while I felt ok enough to run some water over my face and wet a wash cloth to put over my forehead so that I could go back to sleep. If you're wondering why I didn't call for my husband to come to my aid, it's because he's been through so much, worrying over and nursing all my sicknesses in the past damn year(and lately there has been a worrisome occurrence that may or may not be related to my thyroid cancer that I will post about later that has us a little concerned) I just didn't want him to wake up to his wife passed out and suffering on the floor in the damn hallway. I'm pretty sure one of these things would have happened: him having a complete total nervous breakdown or him freaking out and rushing me unnecessarily to the emergency room. But all is well now. I went back to sleep, not before explaining to him, the light sleeper he is, what happened. I'm feeling better. He didn't get sick so I'm thinking it was the effing squash. So I don't send any curses to anyone. It wouldn't be polite.

:o)

Because I'm lazy

I got this meme from Des. Her answers were funny. Same as her, everyone's tagged and no one's tagged.

A - Attached or Single?: Attached.

B - Best Friend?: Lives a gazillion effing miles away.

C - Cake or Pie?: Neither-I'm not a huge fan of sweets even though I did just pledge my undying love for Oreo Cookie Blizzards because I like ice cream best. I make both cake and pie for the husband though.

D - Drink of Choice?: I grew up in the South so I can't live without sweet tea or lemonade. If I'm drinking, vodka and whatever juice is available. I hate beer-it's disgusting.

E - Essential Items?: Lip balm-it might be an addiction. Books-can't live without them. I-pod and camera goes everywhere with me too.

F - Favorite Color?: I like them all. For clothes though I hate fuchsia-it is offensive to my eyes. I don't even like the word fuchsia-it sounds like a really disgusting smelling casserole or something. Puke orange is also a big no-no.

G - Gummie Bears or Worms?: Worms are more fun.

H - Hometown?: Well I live here again and I've already started to get creepy email so I'm not going to say. It's in Fl. I love Fl. Fl is my hometown.

I - Indulgence?: I have a lot. I'm spoiled. Maybe shoes.

J - January or February?: February because it's closer to spring and I hate winter.

K - Kids?: Nope. I love kids but I might not ever have any.

L - Life is incomplete without?: Peanut. The ocean. The wind. The sound of birds. And books.

M - Marriage Date?: March 7- ten years ago.

N - Number of Siblings?: 3, two sisters and one brother and I am the youngest.

O - Oranges or Apples?: I live in Fl so I have to say oranges. But I like them both.

P - Phobias/Fears?: Oh my, didn't I post about this already? I have so many but here goes: darkness, ghosts, that movie The Exorcist(and anything pertaining to demons or the like), clowns, spiders, snakes, sharks, alligators,psychos,creepies, kidnappers, anyone with a voice like that crazyman in that movie Silence of the Lambs. I can't remember what else but I'm sure there's more.

Q - Favorite Quote?:

I don't really have one but this is written inside my sketchbook and I kind of like it:

"Even in that deep misery, I felt my energy revive, and I said to myself: in spite of everything, I shall rise again. I will take up my pencil, which I have forsaken with great discouragement, and I will go on with my drawing, and from that moment everything has seemed transformed in me." -Vincent Van Gogh

R - Reason to smile?: I don't really have a reason. I smile all the time, some people think it's charming, some people think it's annoying. My Grandma once told me it was my best habit.

S - Seasons?: Depends on where I'm living. I do dislike winter though. If I had to choose, summer then. I like to be hot.

T - Tags?: Whoever wants to be. I'm not an assertive person.

U - Unknown Fact About Me?: For a short time in my late teens, I had, what I know now is, an eating disorder. I never told anyone, except my husband.

V - Vegetarian or oppressor of animals?: I tried to be a vegetarian and only lasted a week-I caught a nasty flu and gave up. I'd like to be one because I love animals. Maybe someday I'll try again.

W - Worst Habit?: Plucking my eyebrows. I groom a lot.

X - X-rays or ultrasounds?: All the damn time. Every five minutes it seems like. I'm still not done with all my thyroid cancer crap. And I just had my teeth x-rays done at the dentist two days ago, don't even get me started on what happened and what's going to happen. I have another ultrasound and f-ing body scan coming up soon. It never ends.

Y - Your favorite food?: I can't say, I'm pretty picky. There are probably more things on the 'don't like' list.

Z - Zodiac?: Cancer. I used to believe in all that but now I think it's all a bunch of crap. I do think the stars and planets and tides affect us all. Is it freaky that I am a cancer and I had cancer?

My beach

This morning I watched a documentary about pirate treasure myths and after lunch I rode my bike to my secret beach in search of treasure of my own: shark teeth! Actually I was hoping the tide would be low so I would have firm sand to ride on for some needed exercise but it wasn't. I should've checked before I left but I was in such a hurry, I forgot. I wasn't too disappointed when I got to the beach. Why would I when I have all this to myself?
Exercise is overrated anyway.
I call it a secret beach but it's not really a secret, it's just hard to get to since there is no parking and up until 2 years ago the entrances were blocked by some stingy oceanfront home owners. Someone ran for city council and promised to enforce the law that those entrances are for the public so the home owners had to remove the fences and whatever vegetation they purposely put there to block the walk ways so now it's all mine! Only a few people know about these entrances and I hope it stays that way because the last secret beach I used to visit for shark teeth hunting now has a big parking lot and is full of trash and cigarette butts. This is why I sort of don't blame the home owners. It breaks my heart just thinking about it.


I started looking right away and I have to say, I'm the best shark tooth hunter I know. I've found shark teeth in some of the most picked over beaches. There are a couple places where it's actually impossible for me to leave without finding any. I won't say I don't have a method because I do(which I will keep secret dammit!) but it's 75% luck and good eyesight. There were only a few people there and every time someone passed close to me I would I would pretend to just be looking for shells lest they figure out just how many shark teeth(and bones) there are on that beach(or my secret method of finding them) and tell all their damn friends and cousins. I don't want the whole damn town coming over here pillaging my hunting grounds.




I was doing pretty good. Look at all these, a couple of them are pretty sharp.


Then I saw something shining next to my big toe and found this one!!! It's the biggest one I've ever found. I was so happy I started dancing!

The funny thing is, as soon as I picked it up I looked towards the water wondering if whoever's mouth this tooth once lived in was there ready to pounce on me. I know that shark is likely long passed away(otherwise the tooth wouldn't be gray and black) but still, looking at this tooth I imagined what a jaw full of these teeth would feel like and almost felt like throwing it back. But how could I? I sat there for a long time staring at it.

After a while I took a break to lay down and watch an osprey(probably my favorite bird) hunt fish. He did end up catching one, a pretty big one. But I was too slow with my camera to get a good shot of him flying home with it.

I also waited around to see if the resident of this crab hole would come out and say hi but no luck.


Ever since I got home I keep going into the kitchen where I put that bigmomma tooth to hold it, look at it, and hover over it like Gollum! Myyy Precioussss!



*Update: Oh man! I just found out this tooth is from an extinct Tiger shark!!!

Cat Who Begs for Everything

I'm pretty sure this cat might be Peanut's cousin.

My cousin sent me this

Thanks M!

Why Parents Drink

A father passing by his son's bedroom was astonished to see that his
bed was nicely made and everything was picked up. Then he saw an envelope, propped up prominently on the pillow that was addressed to "Dad." With the worst premonition he opened the envelope with trembling hands and read the letter.

Dear Dad:
It is with great regret and sorrow that I'm writing you. I had to elope
With my new girlfriend because I wanted to avoid a scene with mom and you. I have been finding real passion with Stacy and she is so nice.

But I knew you would not approve of her because of all her piercing,
tattoos, tight motorcycle clothes and the fact that she is much
older than I am. But it's not only the passion...Dad, she's pregnant.
Stacy said that we will be very happy. She owns a trailer in the woods and has a stack of firewood for the whole winter. We share a dream of having many more children. Stacy has opened my eyes to the fact that marijuana doesn't really hurt anyone. We'll be growing it for ourselves and trading it
with the other people that live nearby for cocaine and ecstasy. In the
meantime we will pray that science will find a cure for AIDS so Stacy can get better. She deserves it.

Don't worry Dad. I'm 15 and I know how to take care of myself. Someday
I'm sure that we will be back to visit so that you can get to know
your grandchildren.

Love,
Your Son John

PS. Dad, none of the above is true. I'm over at Tommy's house. I
just wanted to remind you that there are worse things in life than the
report card, that's in my center desk drawer.

I love you. Call me when it's safe to come home.

8 Things

I sometimes pretend like I missed a meme when I'm too lazy to participate but Chani tagged me and this looked easy. So here are 8 things about moi that you might not know.

1. I hate to cook but I'm really good at it. I make really good lumpia(Filipino egg rolls) and brown sugar pie with crust from scratch. I can only make a few things but the things I can make are excellent if I say so myself.

2. Speaking of food, I'm a picky eater, I'm sure I've already mentioned that before. But I really hate fancy food- I mean food that's pretty and artistically arranged but you almost don't know how to eat it. I like simple food, not 'mixed up things', it's hard to explain. If you're picky and you're reading this, you know what I mean right?

3. I didn't learn how to drive until I was 24. This is a long, complicated story that would take forever to make anyone understand and there are too many people who read this blog who might get their feelings hurt(not that I blame anyone). I also failed my driving test twice before I was able to get my license. AND there are certain people I can't drive with because they make me nervous.

4. I sometimes record Jerry Springer. Not because I enjoy watching it. I enjoy watching my husband watching it. The combination of shock, disgust, and amusement on his face is priceless.

5. I hate casinos and gambling. I don't like the noise and the fact that it's a major rip off turns me off as well. I spent a weekend in Vegas once and the things I enjoyed most were the desert heat and the food.

6. I've never been camping. Maybe someday....I doubt it though.

7. I love science and nature shows. My siblings used to make fun of me and call me nerdy and stuff like that so I used to hide in my parents' room to watch Mr. Wizard's World and Nature. I still do and even after the all the teasing, they like them too. I recently checked out a dvd set called The Life of Mammals from the library and I love it even more than the Planet Earth series that were on the Discovery Channel the past couple months.

8. I hate phones. I hate cell phones. Despite that, I spend a lot of time on the phone because I'm too polite to say so when people call me and want to chat. I don't understand the concept of being on the phone just for the sake of, well, being on the phone.



So here's my 8 things. Kinda lame, I know but I'm feeling a little uninspired lately. Everyone's tagged, if you want to be. If not, that's ok too.