Friday, July 06, 2007

Aimless and Random

-There's something amazing about a chubby,water-wrinkled miniature hand, clutching my own because owner of hand is afraid of the dark, water park pirate ship and needed someone to accompany him. Especially since 4 year old owner of hand just bragged about how he's not afraid of anything in the whole world, not even sharks or monsters.

-Speaking of water parks, I had to scream at some people who appeared to be 20somethings, but were probably teens, I can never tell. Basically they were old enough to know better and frankly too old to be in the little kids section anyway. They were climbing down some watery, pirate treasure stairs the same time me and my chubby handed little friend were and they were pushing against us so aggressively in their hurry and excitement, my nephew slipped and fell. I'm not an assertive person.... still though. I yelled,"Excuse me, there's a 4 year old child here!" Not that it mattered, I wasn't born on this Earth to teach anyone how to behave and when I was that age, anyone over 18 was lame. And anyway I forgive them, we all act like idiots in those kinds of places. You really have to LOVE your kids a bunch to bring them to any kind of amusement park. I'd rather stick my fingers into light sockets than hang out there but, it's for the kids, how can I refuse?

-My house is a complete disaster. Someone must have snuck into my fridge and ate my cold KitKat dammit. There's string cheese wrappers in corners I didn't even know existed, cookie crumbs under the dining table, chocolate finger prints on my outdoor cushions and any minute now, the pile of dirty beach towels in the laundry room is probably going to come alive and start walking around. There's really no point in telling anyone about this. It just makes me feel better to write it down since I'm too lazy to clean but not too lazy to walk to the store to buy some more KitKat.

-Peanut was NOT a good boy. I'm pretty sure if I could have heard his thoughts it would have gone something like this: "Great! Someone close to my size! I should hump it!"....." Great! Someone close to my size! It's going to be so fun and easy to steal food from it."....."Great! Someone close to my size! I'm going to use it to distract Angel so I can run out the door when they try to leave!"......"Yes! The little ones move around a lot! I'll use them to show off my herding skills!"..... "Who's dropping all these crumbs on the floor? I love you. When Angel's not looking I'm going to jump onto your lap and scare the hell out of you, so when you start screaming I'll steal the rest of your sandwich."....."Why did Angel lock me in the bedroom again? It can't be because I was humping everyone, they want me, they just don't know it yet. They say no but they mean yesssss." I do love an unruly dog, I truly do. He's a little sad and lonely today so I thought we would go for a long walk after lunch.

-Being around my sisters' kids sometimes make me wish I had a chubby-handed little one of my own. But don't tell Peanut lest he think I love him less.


Maurey Pierce said...

The description of your house is a riot. One should never be without KitKat on more than a very temporary basis.

Um, my word verification for this was "pmsland." Hmm.

Hel said...

I love this post. It makes me feel all laughy.(relaxed and happy after lauging and smiling)

Poor Peanut. Lucky chubby hands.

Laurie said...

What a beautiful post! I am so glad you had fun. Take your time cleaning up...there's no rush.


thailandchani said...

Sounds like you've been having a good time.. and each one of these entries was pretty darn funny! :) String cheese wrappers, eh?

There are some of those around here, too.



Courtney said...

Dogs and nephews wouldn't be nearly as entertaining if they weren't so unruly. :D

Sometimes Saintly Nick said...

I miss brave, chubby, miniature, 4-year-old hands, clutching my own. My youngest grandchild is now 7.

ellie bee said...

chubby hands and chubby feet--I miss them! My kids are big now, and, the house is still a wreck!