Friday, April 20, 2007

My shoes

There are two words that can put me into frenzy mode. Shoe sale.

This isn't a unique story. I'm almost loathe to talk about this to you, fellow bloggers, because you guys write about so many thought provoking and important subjects. I'm not the only woman in the world who loves her shoes, anyway. It's absolutely impossible for me to go shopping with a friend or sister and come home empty handed if any store I visit is selling shoes. Shoes are like crack to me. I have high heels, low heels, sandals, peep toes, wedges, all that good stuff. For every pair I own, I can tell you exactly how much, where, when, and what I was wearing when I purchased them-this is very silly but dammit don't I deserve a little joy? I always cringe a little when I hear someone say they have something cute and never wore, what a waste! I can find any excuse to put on a cute pair of shoes. Caught the flu? Wear those kitten heels to check the mail, you feel like utter crap, but the feet look cute. Feel depressed? Don't pop a Prozac, paint your toe nails blue and put on those peep toes. Gained some weight? Put on those black strappy platforms, black is slimming and anyway no matter what that hell forsaken number on the scale is, shoes always fit! The dog is sick? Drive him to his vet in your cutest nude wedge sandals--they contain the secret to healing. Got another f-ing doctor appointment? Wear these coffee colored wedges because, although the scary biopsy will hurt like hell, the design on the heel will look really sweet under that horrible lighting! I even specifically wore my pink heels the day I knew they were going to tell me I had thyroid cancer because, dammit I'll not be told I have the scary c-word disease in my ratty old brown flip flops! Hey, it's not the remedy for everyone, but it works for me. I have a couple pairs of shoes that could sell on Ebay for enough to feed a a family of ten boys for a few months. This is strange because I have a huge disdain for ridiculously expensive logo-handbags and the like(this is a topic I could bitch about for years). Would you be surprised to know that my favorite shoes are actually old daisy flip-flops I bought in the kids' section at Walmart for $4.99 a few years ago? I walked all over sexy South Beach Miami, survived two nasty hurricane seasons, visited two theme parks, walk Peanut everyday in those flip flops. My second favorite pair I bought in San Jose, California and my heart broke last month because the strap is broken again. I can't repair them because they've been repaired so many times and are just so old( I bought them during the dot-com boom, they're that old). But I refuse to throw them away because I like being able to say that I broke them dancing with my husband.

My shoe collection is outnumbered by my mother's. This is all her fault because this all started when I played dress up in her closet. I learned how to walk in high heels by 3rd grade. She says we're not, but I've asked her if we might be related to Imelda Marcos......

Yesterday I added two more pairs to my stash. Both wedges. I can stop any time I want, I don't have a problem! It was just this one more time and I don't feel guilty about a thing. But they were both less than $25.oo marked down from $70.00 and have you any idea how hard it is to find my size???? It would have been a sin to leave them behind, ownerless. I'm doing a public service, really.


Would it make you feel less dismissive of me if I told you I used to be an environmental/animal rescue activist and fundraiser? No? How about if I told you I donated an obscene amount to animal shelters and nature preserves in the past 12 years? I once saved a baby blue jay and woodpecker.....I'm more than just my shoe habit! I read, I paint, I create beautiful pottery dammit. I care about world events! Or should I just stamp "silly girlie shoe maniac, not to be taken seriously" on my forehead and get it over with? ok fine

13 comments:

super des said...

ha ha twins!

i've so often resisted the urge to post about all my shoes... or the shoes I'm wearing that day. I even almost created a category just for shoes. (and yes some mention always makes it in.)

I'm with ya, my shoe sister! I will go on and post in pride!

Unknown said...

Y'know that journey that everyone says starts with a single step -- if you're not wearing a pair of awesome shoes, you'll get glass in your feet.

I've got a thing for shoes, too. I bought a pair yesterday!

LittlePea said...

I raise my fist to you both! Shoe on--I mean walk on!

thailandchani said...

Good for you! If you enjoy it, that's what matters. I've lived in Birks for the past 20 years. I doubt a closed-toe shoe would fit on my foot. :)


Peace,

~Chani

dmmgmfm said...

I used to be a shoe fanatic, but for some reason, I'm not into it anymore. But I can definitely understand how you feel about your shoes!

ellie bee said...

wear them in good health! Nothing lifts your mood like a great pair of sexy shoes!!!

madge said...

You're talking to the heart when you talk about shoes...

Blondie said...

I used to love shoes, but then I moved to Chicago where you tramp 10 miles to get to the bus through pigeon shit and homeless urine, so now I wear sensible shoes. But I do love purses. :) :) Ahem, cough, expensive ones. :( :) Plus, I wear size 10 because I'm a giant, and they really only make cute kicky shoes for Little Pea people. Those cute shoes look like BOATS on me.

thethinker said...

I am exactly like this, especially with athletic shoes. I've spent as much as $100 (plus tax) on a pair of Nikes. Now I'm hooked on Pumas.

But, I never turn down a good price on a pair of wedges or flats.

heartinsanfrancisco said...

I presently have more footwear (mostly Pumas) than I have ever had at any given time. Not so many grown-up shoes, though.

You must really score at sales, because you probably wear a size that nobody else can fit into.

How are you fixed for glass slippers, Cinderella?

LittlePea said...

:o) I haven't found any yet...I do have small feet 5 1/5. My sister is even smaller-she wears a five.

Hel said...

This is the best post. Ever.

Mary said...

I remember buying a pair of fabulous shoes in Las Vegas--they were the sexiest things ever, at Tulips, with 3-inch heels. I saw someone wearing a pair like them, and rushed up to her, this stranger in Vegas, and she was happy to tell me where she'd gotten them.

I wore them out of the store, $70 later, and walked ten yards, sat down, took them off and returned them. My feet couldn't take it. I was crushed. I have size 8.5 wide midwest German feet.

Damn, though, I love shoes.