Random is as Random does

-I got an email inviting me to a high school reunion. My 15th year high school reunion. Well, well, well. It's pretty odd to get an invitation in October for an event that is going to happen in June but I suppose it;s like a wedding invite where you need to plan around. I'm feeling pretty indifferent about it since I already keep in touch with the people I had wanted to and frankly don't care one way or another to hear about the rest. High school was for me as with anyone, shitty most of the time with a few really great memories. I probably can't fit back into my cheerleader uniform but I was never a huge fan of the school colors anyway. I'm not going to go and I'm not exactly sure why I should feel bad about it since everyone I've told about it says,"No! No! You should really go." It's not so much that I'm LOATHE to go, it's just I don't see the point, there's not going to be anyone there I'm dying to see and since I moved back here, I run into just about everybody anyway. Do you disagree?



-Confession: I accidentally ran over some one's newly paved driveway the other day on my bicycle. Really though, not much harm done because the pave guy(I don't know what the job title was but he was nice to me) was able to fix it since it wasn't completely dry. Still though, I felt bad about it. Absolve me Internets.


-Um. Last week while I was looking for shark teeth, this guy came up to me bragging about his find. That was fine. But when he started with his lectures and instructions about how wrong I'm going about it I had to shut him down by reaching into my pouch pocket. My smallest one was bigger than his biggest one. Does size matter? Absolutely when you've got some jerk in your face telling you what to do and talking out of his ass. I hate when men do that to me, actually everyone does this to me. Just because I'm small and smiley, I must be stupid and in need of guidance. I wrote about this before, small people of the world, you know what I'm talking about. You guys know my shark teeth prowess, I don't need to tell you guys about it.

-Speaking of shark teeth hunting, I wonder how I must look to people who may happen to look out the window and spot me. Big floppy hat, green bathing suit, pink flip flops. Yellow pouch worn sideways that my husband makes fun and says makes me look like a crossing guard. Eyes furtively looking around, head down, shoulders crunched, staggering like a drunk person, gleefully giggling with every find and quickly putting in my bag before anyone sees because I'm stingy like that. Oh and don't forget my pepper spray conspicuously clipped to my bag so as to warn Psychoman if he decides to try it. Or do I look like Psychoman?


-The other day my sister said this to me:

Her: My gawd! You went to the beach again? What the hell, Angel how many shark teeth do you need?

Me: Wellll, it's just that.....low tide was at 1.... and ...and... and the North wind is picking up so I thought...

~~~pause~~~~(defiantly) well guess what?! I'm going again tomorrow!

Her: You're going to drive yourself blind girl. You need to calm down.

Me: SO?!

Her: Didn't you just go Monday? What do you do with all those shark teeth- put them in a damn bowl and sit there whispering,"mine mine all mine?"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~LONG PAUSE~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


Me: SO!!!!?


Yeah. It's that important to me.