I don't usually do this

But this guy deserved it because he was walking around the beach harassing young girls. I don't like to make fun of people's fashion choices, it's not nice and not something I find funny. HOWEVER, if you're looking at this picture and thinking," oh SH*#!That's me", let me give you some advice: If you're goal is to walk around the beach to harass teenage girls, it's probably not a good idea to do it in a fluorescent orange bikini bottom. In fact try not to go to JAIL and just hit on 18 year olds, but go out and buy some shorts first. You can get some at Walmart for $9.99--I saw some last week,OK? By the way, for future reference, women don't get turned on by men in bikinis licking their lips and making obscene tongue gestures at them. Now go home and tell all your friends please.


This post is dedicated to Ms.Maurey Pierce who, a few weeks ago wrote pure poetry about who I think might be this guy's cousin.

And remember this guy? I think he might be a cousin as well.

A Boyfriend for Neenee?

I DON'T THINK SO!!!

As promised here is the picture of the idiot who thinks sending naked pictures of himself is the way to a girl's heart.


Hey Romeo! Let me give you a little tip-my sister doesn't want you ok? She might be too polite to say it frankly-but FRRRANKLY(and luckily)-I'm not. And sending her this picture thoroughly grossed us out. I'm sure you're really proud of yourself to have actually taken the time to pose and primp for her and maybe this sort of behavior works with the kind of women you're used to but you're not her type. What is her type? Well number 1-not you. Number 2-the opposite of you. Number 3-men who don't send pictures of themselves thinking the recipient will be too filled with desire to be grossed out by the fact that a total stranger just sent her a creepy naked photo. You know, really, we feel sorry for you-because you're delusional-we can tell that you're really impressed with yourself-it's obvious you take care of yourself-but maybe no one has put you in your place before or rejected you. And guess what, Mr.Ienjoysendingnakedpicturesofmyself. You're not as hot as ya think and by the way the disco era is over-crazy cool medallions should be put away or reserved only for gangsta rappers.......I'm sure I haven't hurt your feelings and that you'll go on with your life thinking you're hot-hot-hot, but I just thought you should know. For future reference: a simple,"hi how are you, would you like to join me for lunch?" is usually the best way to go if you want to date an actual person with a working brain.

A Boyfriend for Neenee

My sister, Neenee, is going to be single again soon. She gave me permission to tell EVERYTHING about her soon-to-be-ex, and I have pictures too dammit!!!....however I've decided not to---hmph, for now. But, I have decided that I should be in charge of finding her a new boyfriend. She said I could as long as choice number one was :





Mr.George Clooney

Why he should be her future boyfriend:
1. He has salt and pepper hair-she likes that
2. He owns a lake home-she lives in one too
3. It would totally irritate her soon-to-be ex---we like that

Why he should not be her future boyfriend:
1. He drives this and it would mess up her hair-she doesn't like those
2. She told me just the other day,"I don't 'do' lakes, I like the sea."
3. Um, actually those are the only 2 reasons we could think of

Just in case though, we'll keep looking.