Monday Blah(g)

Finished. I'm so loving that word right now. My day of starvation turned into 2 days of starvation. That did not go down so well. Friday I woke up prepared to not eat until about 8:30 because my body scan was scheduled at 5:30 and I was supposed to fast. Luckily(or so I thought) they asked me if I'd like to come in earlier so I went in at 3:30 and by that time my hands were shaking because I'm guessing my blood sugar was really low. About 20 minutes into the scan I asked if they thought I would need to come in on Saturday for more images and the tech said probably yes because there doesn't seem to be enough 'action' in my intestines. I said," That's because there's nothing in there ok!" I couldn't imagine not being able to eat for another day but she said I could have a light dinner and to come back at 11 the next day. That night, even though I had been able to eat a little, I was still so effing hungry. I couldn't sleep because I was imagining all the food I wished for. For some reason I was craving a really buttery baked potato or mashed potatoes, I was actually rehearsing in my brain what I would tell MrPea I wanted to eat as soon as I came out of the hospital. I was so bitchy the next morning. I mean, I know that there are starving people out there, I know this. So how is it that I could not manage a few hours without food? But let me tell you, I was in such a bad mood. To be honest, I was not only touchy, I was downright depressed. It's really strange to me now that it's over the kind of mood I was in. I almost went off on the poor receptionist who told me that the nuclear med department just called her and said they wouldnot be ready for me for 30 minutes. I sort of yelled at her and told her everyone in that hospital is crazy and stormed out. After sitting in the car with MrPea for 20 minutes, I felt bad so when I went back in I told her I was sorry for being so mean . But honestly, guys, imagine not having a decent meal in two days. A half hour schedule delay would seem like an eternity, especially since that would mean a half hour delay in your getting your damn potato you've been dreaming about all night. I had even snapped at the tech person the day before because she asked me to move my head so that they could get a side view image. So I moved. She said," Can you turn just a tiny but more?" I said," If I turn my head any further I'd have to be Linda Blair- Exorcist so can you just take the damn images already?" Ouch- feel bad about that too.....

Anyway, it was over quickly and they were nice enough to show me my images, although they couldn't make any official comments on them since I would have to wait for word from my doctor. I'm hoping that will be by the end of this week. I'm tentatively relieved because there didn't look like there was any tissues in my neck area compared to last year's images so I'll be crossing my fingers until I hear from doc. But I've always celebrated too early only to be kicked in the arse later so I'll just say that I'm glad, at least for now, to be FINISHED with all that crap for another year. AND yes I did order a big heaping plate of mashed potatoes with my tall club sandwich for lunch. I was able to catch up with my sleep this weekend so The Pea you heart is back to 100%.

AND the most beautiful thing to be able to say? I'm going to the beach today. Low tide hits just at the right hour. I don't even care that it's cold out. It's sunny and that's all I need right now.

So far so good this week

This is the week all my medical "stuff" is going down. I had my thyrogen injections on Monday and Tuesday. Both went well without any freakouts or major side effects. I did get head aches but it was probably more due to the lack of sleep I've been getting. Then yesterday morning I went in for my radio-iodine pill. This one has a low amount of radiation for tomorow's full body scan. I sort of have to starve myself tomorow since my appointment is at 5:30. But I made sure that I could use my ipod again this year otherwise I'll just go nuts laying there for three hours. Have you ever noticed you never feel itchy or fidgety until someone tells you not to itch or fidget? The second it starts my nose starts to run or get tickly and my back starts to itch and all I can do is think, mind over matter....mind over matter.....
Hopefully everything will come out clean and cancer free. If so it will be a real first since my surgery two years ago.

I'm too exhausted to be interesting right now. Tell me something funny.....

I promised you some oranges, but have some jelly too.

Because I'm just so nice like that. Sharing is caring, ya'll know that.

So here is my finished drawing in it's new frame. It's kind of lopsided as you can probably notice because when I was cutting the paper I wanted to use to make a matte frame with, I used the wrong measurements...oh you should have seen the temper tantrum that ensued. But I'm not about to spend the time to make a new one to frame it in so here you go. I'm the only one who needs to be bothered by it anyway since it's new home is in my kitchen. I also never intended to get a green frame but, hey it was $7.99!

And I know you're just dying for some jelly so here you go, peeps. Dead jellyfish seems to be a recurring theme over here so I didn't want to break with the tradition last week when I came upon this one. I thought to myself, where are the tentacles? Does this one not have any? ooh I gotta take a picture for my blog!

A few feet away I found the "Medusa". Enjoy the jelly, my friends. I don't know when the next time will be. Oh ok, I'm sure it won't be that long.

Today was not so sunny. But foggy again in just the scary way I like. I couldn't stay longer than an hour though. It was windy and my sweater wasn't thick enough.

Just think about all the shark teeth there in that orange patch I probably missed out on because I was just too cold to really get a good look.....sigh.

Friday Round Up

I haven't been feeling well lately. I haven't been sleeping enough that's for sure. I'm sure that's why. But, even so, it's that time of year again. Well actually that time of year has past because for the millionth time, my doctor's office screwed up with my schedule and again my appointments are later than they were supposed to be. I'm not going to get into it because, it will put me in a bad mood so let's just stay on a positive note and I'll tell you guys that I was not a door mat about it this time. I was a squeaky wheel! So be proud of me, peeps. On the first week of February all my routine follow up cancer 'stuff' starts. I have to get these weird thyrogen injections to get me ready for a low dose radioactive iodine pill that will get me ready for a full body scan(sounds pretty sexy don't it?....it's not). The body scan day is a day of starvation again. It'll suck and I'll probably complain a lot so if you need to check out for that week, it won't hurt my feelings. I always do this stuff in the winter because I'm miserable in the winter anyway, so if I'm sick too then for some reason it's easier for me. I'd rather be sick and miserable in the winter than sick and stuck in the house in the spring and summer. Plus it makes the the winter time go faster for some reason because I have a goal. Are you laughing? I thought so. Welcome to my logic!

Last year's scan showed that there was still some bad tissues left over from the first time I had radiation so, as some of you may be loathe to remember(as I am), I ended up having to have radio-iodine treatment in the hospital again so I'm hoping this time will be a clean scan. My doctor says I should wait for two years of clean scans before I try to have a baby so I was hoping this year would count as year one.....But I won't cry this time around. What can I do, you know? Life isn't so bad for me as it is without a mini-me so I shouldn't get all depressed about it. It's not like being sad would speed up the process anyway. There was so much cancer the first time, I wouldn't be surprised if there was any left over. Or scared. Well maybe a little scared but not like before. And again, there's nothing to be afraid of, this is not the kind of cancer that is incurable, it's just a matter of not wanting to turn into a nuclear bomb because they can only give me so much radiation at a time and then wait for the tissues to disappear before checking to see if they got it all. I may be small but I've always been a scrappy little smurf. I'm not saying I don't complain like a pansy the whole time, but the gloves are always off when it comes to this stuff....

So that's that. On a more random note, ya'll, get this. I met a girl named Nefertiti yesterday. She was as beautiful as her name beholds. I said,"wow, is your mom into Egyptian history?" Her: "I don't know, do you know my mom?" I said," Well, because your name, you know." Her:"No, what about my name?" I said," You didn't know that you have the same name of an Egyptian queen? Are you joking with me?" Her,"I am? For real? How do you know this?" I said,"Doesn't everyone?" Her,"No, honestly I don't know what you're talking about, my grandma has the same name, we both call ourselves Neffie." I told her to look it up. She wasn't kidding, she didn't know and got really excited about it. I wasn't sure if I should be pissed off at how bad the schools are or surprised that i was the first one who noticed and said something. How in the world can you go 22 years with a name like that without *A*anyone telling you or *B* not learning that in basic highschool history?




AND! Check out one of my drawings I did with my new colored pencil that my MrPea gave me for Christmas. Not bad for not having used them in 15 years. I have to admit, I sort of cheated and used an art book to help me, but I didn't outline it and it wasn't a colored drawing, I just used the design as a guide. I bought the book to help me reaquaint myself with simple drawing because I've been painting and doing pottery but not so much drawing for so long and I missed the sign up deadline for classes. I took this with my cell phone so it's bad quality photo. Anyway, this is a little cutesy in comparison with what I like to do but it's not bad for a start. It's not finished here, obviously but I'll show you how it looks in it's frame when I get to it.

I've been waiting for this day for 8 long years

I don't have anything poignant to say, I'm not that kind of writer. Whenever I try, it comes out sounding either corny or negative. And I don't want to be negative on a day thousands of volunteers and I worked so hard to make happen.


But, it's a great day to be American.

(Youtube wouldn't let me post the official video. Everyone has already seen this video anyway)

Small piece of the past

My Grandfather was an aerial turret gunner in WW2. His plane was shot down by a Japanese fighter plane. He and 2 other men, the pilot and radioman, were MIA for I think 3 months. Their plane was shot down and they crashed at sea but survived. They floated at sea for a couple days and took refuge on Mono Island which is located in the Solomon islands. He had been shot in the leg and the natives helped hide them from the Japanese for all that time before they were able to escape to safety. Of course none of us grandkids knew any of this because he never spoke a word about this to anyone. All we knew was that he had been in a war and walked around with a bullet still in his leg. It was understood that we were not to ask about it for he didn't talk about it. I was only a little kid who's only exposure to the idea of war was on Tom and Jerry so I had no idea what any of that really meant anyway. And as I got older it wasn't something I wondered about because I was your typical narcissistic teen. I think he had been asked to speak at church and that was when he decided to share the story so that all the young people listening to him would understand that there is a higher plan for each of us. Even before any of this came to light, we had always looked up to him as our hero and thought of him as the strongest, biggest, bravest, defender from all bogeymen, Captain of all Heroes. I am not joking or exaggerating. Once, when I was 4 years old, we were spending the summer at my Grandparents' farm and we were playing in the barn. We had been told not to play in there but tell 4 kids on the most beautiful, magical farm in West Virginia where not to go and that's the first place you'll find them. We had only been in there for a few minutes when my oldest sister began screaming at a snake that I still think of as the biggest one in the wild I've ever seen. We ran back to the house and upon seeing my tears, my Papa asked what happened. We told him what we saw and ran to my Grandmother's ever outstretched arms and shut the sliding glass door tightly. A half Popsicle later, my Grandmother told us to look out the window. There was our Papa with that big snake, still alive and wrapped around his shoulders, showing us that we had nothing to fear. That's just one of many examples of why we all thought that he was The Man of Steel. This is a man who survived a plane crash hid on an enemy inhabited island in the Pacific during WW2, hunted down for three months and lived to escape and tell about it(but didn't). Whenever I'm scared, I tell myself,"That's who I am, that's where I'm from." There used to be a website that had all the details but it no longer exists.

One month ago I was doing some research because I was looking for that very website or any other that might mention his experience or anyone who knew him. I came upon a post on Military.com on the missing buddies message board looking for him. It was a woman who had gone to his high school some time after he did and inherited a letter that he wrote to his teacher shortly after their escape and she was hoping to share it with his family. I posted back that the very man she was looking for was my Grandfather and to please email me. About two weeks went by and no word. I got a little discouraged because it was posted in 2007 so I thought I'd never hear from her. Right around Christmas, I got impatient and was able to track down her email through Military.com to a highschool reunion website and sent off another note. This time I got a reply! So since then we have been emailing back and forth. She emailed me a picture but honestly I can't pick out my Grandpa in it, probably because I'm more familiar with his face as an older man. But I was happy to have it. I gave her my address and yesterday I received a large envelope with several copies of the letter for myself and the rest of my family and I can't express how happy I was to receive it! Reading it, I could almost hear my Papa's voice. I wrote her to thank her and told her that the loss of my Grandparents was something I've never quite gotten over and probably never will. But I feel like a small piece of my Grandfather arrived in the mail yesterday so for that I thanked her.

**update** My Aunt is going to send me a copy of his written account. I used to have a copy in my computer a long time ago but that one got a virus and my Papa died before he could email me another. So I'll finally have a written account from him of my own....

Flickr

Remember my little trip to St. Augustine? I posted my pictures on Flickr if anyone feels like checking them out.....

Oh heaven help me now

MrPea thought it was a good idea to buy a deep fryer. The home fries were good but good lord this is a dangerous thing for me to have in this house. Because I could eat fried chicken with gravy everyday, 3 times a day until I fall over from cardiovascular disease.....

Confession

I actually considered buying a scanner specifically so I could show you guys my 8th grade school picture. I used to have a printer that scanned, but after my last radiation-iodine treatment MrPea bought me a photo printer that doesn't scan and got rid of the old one. So I have to get a new one eventually. I just wanted you guys to see me in my big 80s bangs, with turquoise blue eyeliner and frosted pink lipstick. So yeah, that's my confession: I once had mall hair and wore blue eyeliner(even though I wasn't technically allowed to wear makeup.) Do with that info what you want and I can't have one of those cute little retrospective posts all the cool people already did. I guess it doesn't really though because I haven't offered up any proof. Still though, you gotta give a girl credit just for the admission, that was hard for me :O)




BTW I left a message at my doctor's office yesterday because I still haven't heard from them even though I was PROMISED everything would be taken care of at the first of this month. I'm supposed to have thyrogen injections(I hate that word) to get me ready for a small dose of radio-iodine(radioactive but not as radioactive as the actual radiation treatment) so that I can have a body scan. And this all has to be specifically timed one day after the other for four days so that everything comes out as accurate as possible. Because if they see any cancer tissue left over then I have to go off my med again and have radiation. I told my doctor at my last appointment that I would be happiest if we did ASAP so that I can get it over with quickly and that by Spring which for me is March, I will be feeling up and at 'em again. Because if I just let it go and not say anything, I'll be waiting until Feb and even then they'll call me the day before to tell me I start my appointment the next day. Even though I TOLD them and TOLD them and even made them write it on my chart that my husband and I share our car, he works 30 minutes away so they need to let me know in advance so that we can plan and he always wants to come with me. I'm not very happy because she reassured me that things would move quickly for me and more efficiently since I was so angry about their incompetent scheduling procedures last year. I don't expect special treatment I just expect human treatment and for people to do what they say they are going to do. You can guess whether or not they called me back or not right? I'm going to go down there Monday morning, politely of course. But at least they'll know I mean business.....That's what I mean guys, that's the kind of stuff you have to do when you are a patient and at some time or other we all are. I used to be so mousy and in so many ways I still am. But when it comes to my health and well being I really don't give a flying, er, cookie, if people like me or not anymore. That's probably the only positive that came out of having cancer but I'll take it.

On Joining New Clubs

Last night I went to a local political club meeting that I joined back when I first started volunteering for the Obama campaign. I only know a couple people because most of the people who I volunteered with weren't really members but were mainly hanging around because we all had a common goal. Now that the election is over, everyone's back to regular routine and I don't imagine I'll see any of those volunteers until next election. (I've already made a commitment to help out with the next Governor race so I hope I can get a few of them on the trail with me) I didn't go to our last meeting which was actually a Christmas Party because at the time I wasn't feeling well. So I imagine the couple people I did actually know didn't expect to see me back. I figured this out when everyone commented on my youth. I'm not a freshly hatched chickadee, I turned 32 last July but these people acted like I was some kind of toddler. I suppose they were shocked because I am the only routine member under 60 minus a handful of 40 and 50somethings. Their delight at a younger face makes me a little sad because it tells me that my peers didn't really get the message. We are on the eve of a huge celebration this January 20th. But when the confetti is swept away, were we all just expecting some kind of magic wand? Poof, the economy is fixed. Zap, everything's wonderful again. Obviously I'm not delusional or expecting any miracles but what happened to the euphoria and the yes we did and let's change this country, we were all feeling on November 5? Everyone said, oh I feel changed, I'm going to do more! Where the hell were they last night? I don't even want to hear busy, most of these people were independently wealthy enough to avoid the financial crisis going on and like me, have the freedom of time. I see their pictures in our local newspaper in the society sections. I guess this isn't glamorous enough..... Last year when I went to get a new driver liscence and reregister to vote, the man standing behind called me a Lexus Liberal. Well, his exact words were, "Yer, one-a-them Lexus Librulls, aintchuh?" I was dumbfounded and said,"I don't know what that is, I've never owned a Lexus." (I can't afford an effing Lexus!) He laughed at me. He was a jerk anyway but I never understood what he meant. I do now.

I think I was feeling down because the speakers who came to talk to us were from local homeless shelters, food banks and emergency residence aid workers. Listening to them speak, I thought about how the people who utilise these places are not nameless faceless people. One of my neighbors told me that recently, she lost her job as a nurse(A NURSE-I thought there was nationwide shortage of nurses?) and that if not for the local food bank, she and her husband, who works at a GROCERY STORE of all places, wouldn't have known what to do or where to go. And the thought of my own sister, who is recently divorced thousands of miles from any family, with three young children, now works 2 jobs and is having a difficult time making ends meet brings it even closer to home. Out of sight, out of mind no more.

I mentioned how disappointed I was at not seeing anyone from our campaign volunteer group to the only former canvassing partner of mine who showed. She said something to me that I'd heard before but this time it didn't sound like an "Oprah-ism." She said not to dwell on who's not here or what other people aren't doing. I should focus on what I would do, what we could do together. Even if it were the smallest of things, we can't save the world, that's impossible but we can find one thing we care about and do what we can. For some reason the one thing that struck me the most was the speaker from the food bank telling us that if we'd like to donate children's clothing not forget to buy underwear because they are really short on underwear. I said to myself, I gotta do something about that. We both made plans to get together and try to get a list of people we could call who wanted to chip in with us to buy some damn underwear at least twice a year. I didn't grow up anywhere near privilege, my dad was in the military. But my gosh we had underwear. I mean, I'm joking about it now but that really really bothered me.

On a lighter(spiritual) note I was pleasantly surprised to learn that the church I recently started attending after years of refusing to step foot in any church(minus once for my nephew's baptism), was deeply involved in the food bank and free clinic I was thinking about volunteering for. They are both only a couple miles away. I've been sort of contemplating whether or not I wanted to become permanent member because I have a lot of unpleasant personal feelings towards church and organised religion that I don't like talking about. (I grew up in a RELIGIOUS home and have always been spiritual but not religious anymore.) That sort of sealed it for me though. If I was slightly leaning towards this church before last night, I'm definitely leaning heavily now. We'll see....

Joy to the world!

I know-I know ya'll. Christmas is over. But that's what I feel like every time I put my new favorite shoes on! I even wore them to church yesterday.(yes I occasionally go to church internets...)They don't look very churchy but ask me if I care. And yes they are hard to walk in but I do fine in high heels anyway. I've been wearing them since I was 4and got caught walking around in my mom's shoes. Officially though she started letting me wear heels when I was in the fifth grade. It was probably a mistake. We had a talent show at school and my friend Ann and I were dancing in it. Because the size of the cafeteria was not large enough to accommodate the whole school, there were 3 shows. The first and second show went off without a hitch. The third show however, is filed in the mortification section of my brain. So there I was in my silver miniskirt that my mom had sewn for me. It was actually a leftover part of my Halloween Costume that I was recycling as my talent show costume since the song we were dancing to had sort of a space-like sound, as so many really bad 80s pop songs did. My little partner had borrowed my sister's exact match silver mini so we were thinking we looked so damn cute. I had on some suede pale grey kitten heel pumps lined with rhinestones that I swore I saw Madonna wearing. By the middle of the song, everything was going great. I look over at Ann and she nods at me because we are ready to do our jumps in unison. First jump I heard a rip. No it was not me, it was Ann. She ripped the silver mini! Not enough to really get embarrassed over but 5th grade girls get embarrassed easily. She had a frozen look on her face and I realized she's about to bail so I felt like I had to save the day. I did my jump by myself and to my horror, my shoe flies off my right foot. Suddenly Ann starts laughing really hard(when she's supposed to be dancing not laughing at me!!) and sort of pretends to move towards me so that I can pretend I need to move towards her but really it's because I need to dance to where my shoe landed so I can put it back on. No one laughed at us, it's likely they thought it was part of the show but I was mortified.....

These shoes definitely make up for any embarrassing moment I ever had. And by the way don't make fun of my second toe, I'm sensitive about it. Really. And don't start with me animal people-it's faux snake skin ok. I don't have a problem wearing the skins of animals that I eat but I don't eat snakes so I won't wear them.

And since I'm on the topic of Christmas gifts I thought I would share with ya'll the fruit of another gift from MrPea. I had to take it with my cell cam because I'm still having a problem uploading with my regular cam. It's been a long time since I've used colored pencils, 14 years to be exact, so I'm pretty much learning from scratch all over again. I used a book to help me with this one. I'm still painting here and there but not as much as before because my easel is in storage until we move and my desk is too small.....at least with colored pencils, the supplies are more portable and I can work anywhere.

I'm finally over my nasty Christmas cold and was able to go the beach yesterday. I really shouldn't be out there in that cold, wet ,sea air but I can't help it. My find was nothing to brag about so I didn't even bother to take a picture. I did see what I'm pretty sure were Right Whales. This would be the time of year for them show up. I know I didn't mistake them for dolphins because there were dolphins too. The Right Whales were further off shore than the dolphins. I could see black tail fins and V-shaped blows. It was the first time I ever saw whales before so I was really happy. The dolphins were grey and playing really close to the shore, I'm guessing because the water was calm and it's too cold for anyone to swim so they had the water all to themselves. Who the hell needs Sea World?(Sea World still makes me cry anyway)

SickPea

I have a nasty cold. It all started Christmas Day with a that really horrible sore throat. I'm at the nasal congestion and fatigue part. I would probably be feeling a lot better today if not for the really loud music some people in my building thought the rest of us wanted to listen to until 4:00 in the morning. So I had maybe 3 hours of sleep last night. I just woke up from a two hour nap so I'm feeling much better than I was this morning. I'm tired though. I still can't upload pictures but I wanted to share with you what MrPea got me for Christmas. Best gifts ever!

Peace be with Thee Internets

I had a cute picture for you my peeps but our computer has been hijacked by something really funky and my camera cannot upload. I couldn't let the day pass without wishing the Happiest of Holidays to everyone in the Blogosphere. To those who don't celebrate, have a beautiful and relaxing day.

Peace, Love, Happiness!

Hell on Earth is a shopping center in December

MrPea and I don't usually do gifts because we shop together often. Plus, he is the sort of guy who, if he wants it, he bought it already so that makes it so difficult to shop for him. This year we decided to do gifts. I am the sort of person who is usually finished Christmas shopping before December even rolls in but this year, economics forced me to wait until this week. I can't tell you where I went because MrPea likes ruining surprises for himself. I can't even tell you about the miracle wrapping techniques I had to use so that he wouldn't be able to shake, inspect, put his ear next to and figure out what. Yes, I had to sabotage for the sake of Christmas.

Oh. How the hell can anyone even think of shopping this time of year? There are some people out there who love all this. I am not one of them. I usually do not step foot in any retail store from mid November until February.


I actually stood in line behind someone who I just SAW park a $70,000.00 vehicle argue with a poor, tired looking cashier over 48cents. According to his calculation, his amount due should have been 48cents less than the cash register's figure. Honestly, I wanted to reach into my pocket and just give him the 48cents he was bitching about. I totally get it that economic times are tough-- MrPea and I have been cutting back on just about everything and I've been on pins and nails every time his company announces job cuts. OK I'm there. But this guy wasn't using a,"I'm sorry, I think there must have been a mistake," kind of tone. It was more of a,"You f-ing stupid ass people need to correct this extra 48cents otherwise I'll enjoy ruining everyone else's shopping experience...." outburst. The worst thing about it was, he was with his kid, who will likely grow up to be just as rude and entitled as his father. Happy Holidays....

The cashier kindly told him he'll have to take it up with customer service and I swear she is my new hero because there was a HUGE line at customer service. Just as someone who used to work in retail, and suffered through a Holiday season, I always cringe when I hear people say,"The customer is always right." No, my dear, the customer is not always right. Sometimes the customer is an assh@##. I didn't bother to see if he took it up with customer service but I did giggle with the cashier over it. Poor girl, I bet he wasn't even the worst of them. You know who 'they' are. You've probably been encountering 'them' just as much as I have.

What the hell happens to us at Christmas? Are we a bunch of vultures? Just a social critique but the only good thing that I hope will come out of our collective belt tightening this season is that maybe people will realize how ridiculously overboard they have been going as far as gift buying. Look, I'm no Scrooge, I LOVE buying gifts for my nephews but I still don't get why people spend thousands+ of dollars on their kids, tell them some strange man drops down the chimney to give them all these things for free and then wonder why their kids start acting all entitled and materialistic when they are too old to believe in Santa Claus. Don't jump down my throat, people with kids, I know-I know, I don't have any so I can't really say anything. But I'd rather raise my hypothetical kids to believe that 'mommy and daddy work really hard so I should be thankful for these wonderful gifts they bought me' than the above method. Mind you, this does not mean I would ruin Santa Claus for them. Of course Santa will come down our chimney, just not with 1000s of dollars worth of free stuff for being "good". I'm not delusional, I have 6 nephews ok? There's no such thing as a kid who's '$3000.00 at Toys-R-Us' good. I used to work for a Child Care Center in a neighborhood who will not be feeling the economic pain the rest of us are, and I can tell you right now, every single one of those children had some kind of behavioral problem. Because their parents were either the "I want to be my kid's best friend" types or the "buy everything the kid wants so he'll shut up" type. Or "they are being raised by their nannies and spend about 5 minutes per day with their kids so they use money to alleviate their guilt" type. And once in a while I'd run into the "I'm an unapologetic jerk and I want my kid to grow up to be just like me" type, like I did today.

Oh I'm in a bad mood today aren't I? Am I picking on kids? I can't be, I love children. I wish I had 10 of them I do. No, I'm picking on parents.

Well after all my lecturing about wasteful spending, my sister sent me this:

And it sounded like a reasonable request.

I finished only 5 dollars over budget for MrPea and have one more gift to get at Tar-jay. Oh help me if I have to spend more than 5 minutes in another store until all this is over.....

More More More

That's it for a little while though. I need a break. My eyes need a rest. At least I have something to post as I am still blahgged out lately.




These are nothing to get excited about but I thought they looked interesting. A nice patterned piece of crab shell, a broken whelk and the one on the bottom is very common-I forgot the name. But it looks pretty hanging in the sun so it was the only one I kept.

More teeth.

The find of the day was this reddish one. Second time I found a red tooth.

A stingray barb and really worn down tiger shark tooth.

I did make friends with an old guy who found a blue starfish but I was too shy to ask if I could take a picture. I also met some people from out of town who asked for some tips. Normally I don't give out tips to tourists as I am stingy and want all the shark teeth for myself. I usually just say smile and play stupid and say," I don't really understand how to find them myself, I just stare at the ground until I see one." But they were Floridians and I was feeling generous. It is Christmas after all.... they even came up to me later all triumphant with a small bull shark tooth and gave it to me.

Do not adjust your screen,just another day in the fog

It really was that foggy. Scary Scoobie Doo episode foggy. Edgar Allen Poe foggy. You know what I mean. Ooh and it was fun.

My find was nothing to brag about....


But I did have fun scaring myself as the fog got worse and worse. I sat on a dead palmetto eating chocolate covered graham crackers and pretended this man in dark clothes was a Psychoman coming to get me. Passing by, he looked at me funny, um, I don't know probably because I was giggling like a campfire kid listening to a scary story at a girl scout trip.

Most sane people would have packed up and went home because after about an hour you could barely see at all unless you were crouching on the ground to take pictures, er, which was what I was doing.

I always think to myself, it's a good thing only a handful of people come to this beach because I'm pretty sure I must look like a complete fool to anyone who happens to see a girl laughing by herself and skipping around in the foam.
At the same time do I care whether anyone sees me walking around in foam? No. And why should I? Everyone should, at least once walk around in algae foam grossing themselves out in the fog. Just cuz they're wearing flip flops and they can.



The fog was so bad that any hair sticking out of my hood was dripping wet and my nose was running.

At last look before I dragged myself back to my bike to go home, I could hardly see the ocean anymore.

Call me crazy, but there's just something magical about a scary fog.

Not bad at all

The ocean's been kind of rough lately. I couldn't get out the the beach until today when low tide is too late in the day for me to really find the good stuff. Today's find was not as I had hoped but here's the thing: It's December and I'm on the beach wearing flipflops, do you think I'm going to even think about complaining? And anyway, as you can see, I did ok for a mid-tide , foamy trek.

The best ones were these, that bigger one being a Great White. I did end up finding a small handful more than this after my apple juice break (when I took these pictures) but I was too lazy to take more pix and anyway, ya'll get the point.

These tiny ones are kind of interesting because they have a redddish color to them that my camera didn't capture well but take my word for it. When I saw them wet on the sand, they were a red-orangey color.

It had been thick-foggy all day and just before I left at 4, the sun came out for a peak and this shrimp boat sort of appeared out of no where. I thought, if I squint my eyes, it could pass for a pirate ship but alas, Johnny Depp did not show up. Oh well.

Peanut is still king of the snow

Even though it doesn't snow here. Yesterday was Peanut's 11th birthday so I wanted to post this picture of him in Canada. As I've said before, we got him on Valentine's Day at a pig farm in Slidell, Louisiana. I almost didn't take him home because when I picked him up he was so wiggly and noncompliant unlike his wiry haired sister, who, I was 5 seconds away from putting in my backpack and running off with after we had already paid for our new disobedient, new shoe eating puppy. He sort of chose MrPea, even though today he has an "I love you/I'm ignoring you unless you have food or something I need," attitude towards the both of us(but especially MrPea). He doesn't listen. He'll run out the door if you leave it open. He steals unattended food. He likes destroying crumpled up paper. He enjoys dismembering and disemboweling his toys. He likes to hunt lizards in a creepy, stalkerish manner. He also begs shamelessly and sticks his face in everyone's food. But still, we'll keep him around a little while. He's our old man of the house.....


I have nothing interesting to post as nothing interesting has happened lately. Well, no, there are a couple noninteresting but noteworthy things I can tell you peeps.

-Two days ago I was wearing a short skirt and teeshirt. This morning our temperature was 43. How the hell is that possible?

-Last week MrPea talked me into buying some really highheeled snakeskin(faux,mind you) peep toe shoes. I'm loathe to admit that I loveth them. But my goal was to find warm shoes. I did not accomplish this goal because I hated everything else in that store that looked remotely warmish. And there they were beckoning me. But I've decided to return them. I already feel jealous of whoever's going to buy them. I feel like I need to take a picture of them before I bring them back. Is that sick or what?

Sorry that's all I have for you guys as I'm all blahhged out. Give me something to blog about peeps. Ask me something, I'll tell you. As it is, life is blissfully quiet right now and I find myself in hibernation mode with the drop in temperature. No shark teeth either, the wind is damp and cold. Maybe next week.

Feedback Please!!

I'm not so sure I'm crazy about the new look over here but I needed a change. Please give me some feedback guys and let me know if it shows up well or if I should lose all these colors and get with a more simple palette. Even if I don't hear from any of you peeps, I might just change it all up anyway. I am keeping my header no matter what. I'm just not so sure about keeping a template that forces me to have the same color for my header and post font.

Tuesday Confession

I have been eating chocolate covered popcorn nonstop for 5 days now. Yesterday I ran an extra half mile just so I could eat a bigger chunk of chocolate covered popcorn when I got home. I hate sweets but I do this every winter with the chocolate. Why?


Last week I had a Doctor appointment. I got bullied into agreeing to having a body scan this January. Well I wasn't really bullied, she just told me that this would be a yearly thing until every body scan in a row for 3 years showed up clean. This means I could possibly have another radioiodine situation which depresses me just thinking about because of how badly it was all coordinated last year. I talked with her about how angry I still was about all the scheduling problems, the no return my phone calls, the letting me know about my appointment the day before, making appointments without asking me first, me being off my meds for 6 weeks instead of the 2 that I was promised which resulted in my being extremely and unnecessarily ill and sore for a month and a half, etc etc. She said she'll give me her cell phone number so that if this happens I can reach her directly but I have a feeling it will all be the same story. Everyone gets treated this way by their healthcare providers when we have a for-profit-system so I don't see why I would get any better treatment just because I'm bitching about it now. Plus even she knows it's a possibility otherwise, why would she try to make me feel better by giving me her number. I have a feeling it won't come to that though. I mean, I've had radiation twice. Most people with my problem only need it once. I'm preparing for the worst though because my tumor was the size of a friggin banana. That way I won't be disappointed if they still find some left over cancer cells. I told her I wanted to get it all done ASAP so I could get it over with. She said January, which I'm wondering if it really means February since that's when it all went down last time. If you were around back then, you'll remember I snuck in an old phone so I could post. What I didn't post was that they were working on the fire alarm system and it was going off every hour from 11pm until 6am. The food was puke on a plate and my view was a brick roof. I took so many showers and drank so much damn water, forcing myself to pee as much as I could(that brings your radioactive level to safer levels so you can go home), that's why I got out of there in 24 hours. I'm doing it in a different hospital this time. I wish you guys could have seen my room when I left. They tape paper on the floor and everything in the room except the bed and in the bathroom they use latex to cover anything that might be touched except for the shower. The water facets look like they are giving you the bird because they used latex gloves. It was a primary election day so I decided to write Barack! all over everything in the room. Every nurse that came in said," bay- rack? what's that honey?" At around 2am when I gave up on getting any sleep because the effing alarms were going off, I started writing stupid stuff like,"Help me help me. They told me I was a mental patient...I just thought I was Elvis...they are keeping me against my will. Can I have some Cheerios please?"Anyway, at least I'll be left alone until after Christmas....


BTW Did anyone watch Charlie Brown last night?