Little Pea

Go to my other blogs

2010-11-02T10:40:00.002-05:00

I still get site reports from this blog even though I know longer post here. I just wanted to leave the links for where I am now:

my beach life and random thoughts blog:http://www.morepeapod.blogspot.com/

my beauty tips blog : www.earthangelface.com

come visit! :o)

FRESH PEAS FOR EVERYONE

2010-04-27T10:06:00.002-05:00

I'm starting a new blog. I need a fresh start. This one's been great but the past few months have taken me away from blogging and every time I think of this one I feel like I don't want to blog anymore because it's been so long. I feel like I'm constantly excusing myself for not blogging often and every post is that way. And it's not even that I've run out of things to say I NEVER run out of things to say. This blog has been with me through the worst parts of my life and the idea of starting a new blog makes me a lot happier than trying to revive a beloved yet neglected one. A new blog that(hopefully) has nothing more to do with radiation, nausea, or surgeries. (At least for now) Does that make sense? It'll have to because that's all I've got.

Send me an email to peapodblogger@gmail.com or leave me a comment if you want to know where I am and I'll give you my new blog address when I get it myself.

Back from the Antibiotic Netherworld

2010-03-15T12:54:00.004-05:00

Can you believe I'm still sick? Yep. I was taking a Zpack when I last posted and got better for whopping 3 days before I started to feel sick again. Those of you who get sick a lot(like me) know what that is. I hate taking antibiotics, in fact I really don't like taking any kind of medication. You know those prescription drug commercials that come on during the news? When they get to the part where they have to say what the side affects are, I nod my head. Because I am always in that 30% of people or that 10% or whatever number they mention that reported side effects in trial studies. Anyway, I started to feel sick again about a week after my last pill but I tried to ward it off by the magic of "denial". Didn't work. When I finally admitted to myself that I was sick again, I thought I would just weather through and try to fight it off on my own. I thought,"hey, I don't have to work and I don't have any kids to take care of. I can just rest, drink a lot and stay in the house and I'll be up and at 'em again by next week. That didn't work either. Finally when I was realizing that it was getting worse and the husband woke up one morning complaining of a nasty sore throat, I broke down and made an appointment for the both of us with my doctor. So we're both taking a ten day round of amoxicillan. I'm finally beginning to feel human again while poor MrPea is in the thick of it. I hate antibiotics. Not for any particular reason. It's actually the only kind of medication I can take and not be in the whatever percent of people who have side effects. I just hate taking them because it means I can't be out in the sun too much and then I can't go look for shark teeth. I can't do it anyway because, well, I'm sick , it's REALLY windy right now and the air is full of pollen but I need something to blame.

It's the same story every winter. It gets cold and I get sick in one way or another. And here I was celebrating another year of not having cancer crap to do. My body will never be the same I guess. Since I can finally stand up and walk around without feeling like I'm going to die I've decided to go get my nails done. I always do my own nails. I go get a pedicure maybe once a year because I can do just as good a job as they can at my house for free but I really need to do something nice for myself--- we've been living like 2 zombies for the past couple weeks. Take care of yourself internets. That's my advice to you.

I have a cold or something

2010-02-12T17:51:00.003-05:00

It wouldn't be a true winter if I didn't get some kind of illness to keep me company. Normally I wait until I feel like I'm on death's door before I call my doctor because I know the routine. He'll give a prescription for antibiotics and tell me to wait a couple days to see if I can fight it off on my own before I get it filled. This time he told me to go ahead and just take them because my ears and throat looked so bad. I haven't had a sore throat this severe since I had Scarlet Fever when I was 16. I didn't get any sleep last night because it hurt so bad(cue sad violin music). I didn't want t take anything stronger than Advil because I have routine bloodwork to be done next week and I don't want to ruin the results. After a three hour nap, I do feel a little better. Just tired.

I discovered the best tea ever made. I feel like a crackhead over it. I went to the Fresh Market last night to buy some and I actually started to have an inner freak out when I forgot which aisle it was in. Anyone who likes tea would love this one. It's a little expensive for my taste but definitely a luxury I'm willing to pay for at a time like now. Anyway try it, you'll love it. Just don't buy the last box if you shop where I do because I can't be responsible for what would happen.

I'll be in a coma for the next couple days.

I love my husband

2010-01-31T14:51:00.012-05:00

MrPea loves to upgrade our electronics. We have houseful of gadgets that he loves. He recently bought a new laptop. I could never get as excited about a wireless this or that, no matter what the hell it can do, as much as I can get excited over a hot pair of shoes. I'm always complaining about the wires and get irritated when I have a hard time figuring out to use something.("Why doesn't anyone ever invent a gadget that you don't have to 'learn'?!? Why can't we just press the on button?!? I feel like I've just bought a new problem not a new tv! How many wires does a person need??!! " can be heard at any time of the day in our house)

Now having said that, MrPea, the technology addict also just bought himself a new BluRay Dvd thing that I'll admit is wonderful. It connects with the Netflix website and we can watch some of the movies immediately(using the new laptop). Oh the joy that is Netflix! We've been watching French movies all weekend which is good for both of us because he can watch all the stuff he's missed out on in his first language and Ican learn new words.

We go through the same routine when it comes to buying new stuff, and I've posted about this before but not in detail. Take the new laptop for example-- Since we've moved, our computer is downstairs. Our old place was much smaller and all one floor so the only room for a computer desk was in our bedroom. This worked out well because I go to sleep earlier than he does so we were still "together" even if I was sleeping and he was staying up watching tv, doing work or whatever. He wanted a laptop to bring upstairs so we could still be "together". But this is how he'll tell me he wants one:

Him: "Don't you think we should get you a laptop? It would be a good idea because then you could use it upstairs whenever you wanted."

~It always starts out being for ME even though he knows I have ZERO desire to add another electronic device to this house.~

I'll say: "Not really, what do I need one for when we already have one. It's just the 2 of us."

Him: "Well you know, it would be more convenient for you. What if I'm using this one and you need it?"

Me: "um..I could just wait."

Him: "Well, you wanted a Kindle I thought. It's almost the same thing."

Me: "Not really. And I don't really want a Kindle. OMIGOSH more wires? Are you kidding me, I'm already sick of all the wires around here. Like I want more."

Him: "So...you wouldn't love to have a nice new laptop? WIRELESS?"

Me:----- smiling in silence -----

Him: "I'm sure I heard you say you wanted one. I've been looking on Amazon so I could find one for you. I found a couple of nice ones. Let's go to Best Buy and check it out in person."

Me: " I don't want to go to Best Buy. I hate Best Buy."

Him: "I really think it would be good for you. And so convenient. You really don't want one? I think you do want one. I can get you one if you show me which one you like."

Me: "No. I promise I don't want a new one. But if you wanted one for yourself, just get one. Go for it, make yourself happy."

Him: "Maybe I should get you one anyway. Yeah, I might as well just go ahead and get one for you. You'll love it. You'll see."

So he bought one and he's as happy as happy can be with it while I have yet to touch it. It always goes this way. It always starts out being FOR ME when he knows I'd rather pull out all my hair than shop for any of that stuff. He's like a 3 year old who wants ice cream but won't just come out and say he wants ice cream. I'm not controlling, he doesn't need to come to me for permission to buy things and vice versa.

But if I don't go a long with it, I'll be in that same conversation at least twice a week. I think it's easier for him to justify spending the money if it's for me because in his mind, he would never deny me anything, I'm his wife. Buying something for himself is hard though. When I need a new pair of suede boots, if I have the money, I just go get them-- I don't pretend he needs them.... can you imagine that conversation?

Omigosh-NO joke, just now, from the kitchen he said, "Do you want a scooter? It would be so fun for you this summer."

2010-01-28T21:03:00.009-05:00

MrPea and I went out for dinner tonight. We looked around and realized we were the only ones in the restaurant without white hair. (Welcome to Florida!) There was a table of women sitting near us and they were celebrating a birthday. She was 100.

The other night at my Book Club meeting, the conversation turned political. I got a little tense because there were about 15-20 people in the room so I was imagining the night would probably not end well. Luckily I was wrong. It was the first time I was ever in a room of people discussing politics with voices of disagreement that things didn't get ugly. There were very strong opinions and emotions but no disrespect. There was even a little teasing and giggling when the topic changed. (I realize this is a very boring paragraph but I had to write about it because) I was really shocked when it didn't turn into an "I hate you Festival." It was a conversation I wish we could all be having wherein each party had something intelligent and thoughtful to say instead of the name calling, finger pointing and accusations that seem to be popular(from both sides) right now. I'm not exactly sure how I feel about the fact that I was automatically expecting a huge fire.

Now I have to do a complete turn around and do the exact opposite of what I was so happy about the other night. I know I know I can't help it I just have to. So speaking of finger pointing I have to say something about Facebook. I was probably the last person on Earth to get a Facebook page. I never did Myspace for reasons that another post would explain. And so far I'm not too eager to get a Twitter account just yet because I'm not so sure that the every 5 minute details of my life are exciting enough. Nor do I feel the need to know what everyone else on the internets are doing every 5 minutes of their lives. (I'm open to the possibility though, just not right now.) However, last year my sister got on Facebook and after months of convincing, I finally broke down and got on myself. I don't really post very often. Mostly I like to see what everyone else is posting and I like looking at pictures of long lost friends and their kids. But lately I've been avoiding it because of how angry and puritanical certain old friends seem to be. I didn't get on so I could have someone else's politics and religion shoved in my face every 5 minutes. Tell me about your life, your kids, your accomplishments. If I want to know your beliefs, chances are I've already asked you. I had to hide a good friend's updates because it was so full of "Repent now- all you sinners will go to hell" posts, I felt like I was in a fire and brimstone, burn all the witches flashback. I love a good scripture verse or a thought provoking theological news article. But if I have memories AND pictures of you in a skimpy bikini shaking your ass at a Holiday Inn Spring Break "Shake What Your Momma Gave You" contest, I really don't want to hear how much better and holier you are than the rest of us heathens just because you go to church now. If you feel guilty about something, work it out on your own. I'm sure it's all part of the repenting and the posts about the devil but using the "devil took over and made me do it but now I'm a REAL Christian as apposed to you fake ones " is no excuse for thinking now it's ok judge everyone else. Think I'm being judgemental? Maybe I am, I'm not perfect. But I'd rather study and share my bible than shove it in some one's face. (Cue me stepping off my soapbox and kicking it)

Never Say Never?

2010-01-27T13:47:00.007-05:00

These are all things I've never done. And it's highly likely that I will never do any of these things. If you think I need to change my mind, let me know.

-Worn hoop earrings, animal print, or pointy toed shoes. Not that there's really anything wrong with them. Just a matter of personal taste.

-Read any of the Harry Potter books or any of the movies. Actually no, I think I may have seen the first one but not the rest.

-Eaten sushi. I don't like seaweed, I've had that before so I will not eat anything wrapped in it. I also don't really like fish or raw fish.

-Been scuba diving. I've told you guys before how scared I am of even swimming in the ocean because of sharks. And I grew up on the beach. But if I am finding their teeth, it means they are losing them and growing them. I'd like to not have any of those teeth embedded into my thigh thank you very much.

-Been to Antarctica. This is self explanatory.

-Seen a moose in the wild. This one I'd like to change. I'd really like to see a moose in the wild. Don't ask me why, I just would. But I don't spend a whole lot of time in Northern Forests so it just doesn't seem likely.

-Seen the movies West Side Story, Breakfast at Tiffany's, or Cassablanca. I just never made the effort.

-Used the phrase "Hiya Sailor!" Even though my father was one and I grew up on a military base.

-Taken candy from a baby. I hate when people use that expression-that something is as easy as taking candy from a baby. How is that easy? Why would anyone want to take candy from a baby? I would never take candy from a baby. Babies like candy and so do I so why would I deprive a precious baby from eating candy? I wouldn't.

-Mountain climbed, mountain hiked, mountain biked or really anything to do with mountains. I don't have anything against mountains. In fact I love mountains, they are beautiful. I just never felt the urge to climb one, hike one, bike one or, slide down one on skis. I do enjoy a good walk but I've never been on a trek that required "gear".

-Been camping. A lot of my life is lived outdoors so people are often surprised to learn this(and the above) but basically if I can't bring a blow dryer,I won't go. Because I usually don't have a good time if I don't have access to basic electricity and/or a warm shower. One shouldn't assume that I've never "roughed it" before. I have. I just don't voluntarily vacation outdoors. Now if the definition of camping were a cabin in the woods with a warm bed and fireplace, sign me up.

-Spotaneously broken out into song. I'd like to though, I really would.

-Jumped from a high dive. I'm 100% sure that my swimming skills are enough. It's just not something I ever wanted to do.

I'm sure there's more but that's all I can think of right now.

Um. OK

2010-01-26T13:33:00.002-05:00

I overheard a couple of women talking about the situation in Haiti the other day while I was waiting in line at the grocery store. One of them actually said what I am about to type. I am not joking.

"How come they need all of our money? What is wrong over there, don't they have Target or Walmart or some kind of store like that?"

yeah...

Ok ok playtime's over...actually not really, it's just bad weather

2010-01-21T14:14:00.004-05:00

This was the first New Year that I didn't have an illness looming over me and all kinds of anxiety over upcoming appointments and it's been such a good feeling. I guess I've been celebrating my freedom a little too much. I do have bloodwork a few times a year that I'll have to stay on top for the rest of my life and routine body scans(luckily no body scan this year yay!) but that's the wonderful thing---it's just routine. I'm so thankful that I was able to start the year out that way. It truly felt like a new start. Especially since we're in a new house that we love and feel comfortable in.

It's storming outside and any minute now I might have to grab the Peanut, and run to the downstairs bathroom because there's a tornado watch. I found a really big tiger shark tooth the other day as well as other things that I wish I could be on the beach looking for....sigh. I feel like a little kid whose mom is forcing to stay indoors. I didn't even wish anyone a Happy Holiday, I was having so much damn fun. I've been gallivanting and frolicking on my now, just across the street beach. And I've been so effing exhausted from this move. I do have a peace offering. Take a look at this peeps:

See? I found this last week. ON THE BEACH! This is why I'm always gone. There's always something new to discover. I've never found a spearhead(I did some research, an arrowhead would be smaller so this is a spearhead. Likely used for hunting deer) or any man made artifact before. On the beach or anywhere. I was just walking my dog, not even really paying attention to the ground. The sea and sky were way more interesting and I can't look for shark teeth if Peanut is with me. My eye just sort of fell on it and I thought to myself,"wow that looks like a.....omigosh it is!" Someone made this. A person. Who had a life and a family and skills enough to make something that a little shark tooth huntress would find hundreds, possibly thousands of years later. I would love to know the story behind it. I find myself holding it in my palm often thinking all kinds of happy thoughts. Isn't it beautiful? I won't fool myself into thinking I'll find more. I've never heard of arrow and spear heads being found around here. It's highly likely this one fell in the river north of here and washed out to sea only to be washed back in by the tide. I'm still the Queen of shark teeth so even if I never find anything more than this precious piece of history, the happiness of this one will last a life time. Of course I'll share if I ever do. So we're still friends right?

There's a reddish Hawk that perches on the highest dead palmetto behind my house at least two or three mornings a week. He's wonderful and I'll get a picture of him for you guys. I can identify him as soon as I get a good bird book. I've been referring to him as Eric the Red. I'm scared to go back there because of the marsh and there's all kinds of snakes and varmints lurking about. MrPea bought some really strong binoculars that will come in handy for my birdwatching.

I can't wait til spring.

I live on my secret beach now and I'm still in bliss so just get used to these posts for a while

2009-12-14T21:06:00.003-05:00

I didn't dare walk on the beach for Peanut's morning walk this morning. The fog was too thick and scary even for me. Usually I like a scary ScoobyDoo episode kind of fog. Today was the scariest I've ever seen and I wasn't in brave mood. But yesterday on my walk I came upon the biggest effin Portuguese Man O'War I've ever seen in my life. MrPea says he's seen and been stung by ones this big but it was a first for me so I took a pic. I used my foot as a size guide. I wear a 5 and a half and the thing was almost as big as my damn foot. I didn't touch it. Their stingers are still venomous even after it's dead.

2009-12-13T09:05:00.002-05:00

i got to wake up to this.....

spent our first night in

2009-12-12T09:12:00.002-05:00

spent our first night in our new place. we can hear the ocean from our window. took peanut for his morning walk on the beach.

Just enough time for one quick Christmas memory post

2009-12-06T19:12:00.004-05:00

When I was 5 years old we moved to Hawaii.(I mentioned this a million times but my high school English teacher always told us to write with the assumption that the reader just met you and has no clue about your history so here you go Mr.J) The church where we started going regularly had a Christmas party and every child under 12 received a toy. I'm guessing my mom must have signed up our names and ages because they had Santa Claus call out every one's names when it was their turn. Since I have an "A" name, I was one of the first ones called and I got to tell Santa that I was really good(which was probably a lie) and thanks for my toy. I opened my present and was pretty happy with the little yellow and white bear. Until Santa called my sister's name and she came back WITH A BARBIE. I then and there decided I HATED that yellow bear and I cried all the way home. I'm pretty sure my dad lectured me on being thankful for the gifts I'm given. Yeah, in one ear and out the other. In my defense I was 5, the youngest of four kids and used to getting hand me down toys so of course I was likely pouting about the fact that I was going to have to wait a long time for my sister to get sick of that beautiful Barbie in a pink ballgown. My parents must have either felt sorry for me or secretly agreed that what I got was LAME because that evening after dinner they went out and came home with a Malibu Barbie for me. I do have a memory of not really liking it at first because the one my sister got had cuter clothes and all mine had was a bathing suit. Until our other sister showed me the tan lines and told me this Barbie was more Hawaiian. I don't remember what became of the yellow bear. It probably ended up on that island of misfits in the Rudolph movie I still watch every year.

I'm still in the process of moving and have tons of really tedious and boring things to do but I haven't posted in a long time so I thought I would share a memory of how annoying I was as a little kid during Christmas.....I'll try to post more when this is all done.

Happy Thanksgiving

2009-11-25T20:21:00.000-05:00

Look what my little kindergarten kids gave me the other day!

stuff

2009-11-16T20:45:00.004-05:00

I had no other title for this post. And I've really been into list form lately so just put up with it until it passes.

1. I'm moving. About a mile away so I'm not really sure why I'm stressed out about it. Especially since I'm so in love with our new place and I have plenty of time to get everything ready(30 days). Something about moving just STRESSES me out. We've been in this condo for 4 years now and it's been great. I'm really happy for whoever gets to live here because it's the sunniest window-est place we've ever been in. But we've been wanting to move for a long time and it's taken us this long to find something we like. I'm superstitious so I won't go into details about this new place until I'm moved in. Keep your fingers crossed for me for the next 4 weeks, I don't relocate very well. I should be an expert at it since we've moved so many times but I get more stressed out than a bridezilla when I move. Under all the anxiety is a huge YAY, though. Details later.

2. I haven't looked for shark teeth in what seems like ages. And it feels like all is not right in the world when it's been this long. I can't blame it on the weather, the Florida fall makes me feel sorry for anyone who doesn't live here. It's because ever since I hated my July vacation pictures of myself , I've made a commitment to make exercise a priority in my life again. Exercise is really good for my self esteem even if I don't notice any change in the mirror so I've been jogging just about everyday and I don't jog on the beach like every other sane jogging person around here. As I've said before, this is torture. I cannot jog or do anything at the very place where thousands of shark teeth are waiting to be picked up by me. No I can't. So I jog in my neighborhood fitness room or at a park down the road. I would go crazy otherwise. I can't explain it, that's just the I am.

3. I hurt my neck today. I was driving and trying to take off a jacket at the same time. Suddenly my neck got mad at me. It hurts.

4. I realize most people wouldn't dream of moving during the Holiday season but strangely it makes me more excited. It will be a tight squeeze but I look forward to unpacking my Christmas decorations and celebrating a New Year in a new home. A home that I don't have memories of being sick or "radioactive" in. Does that make sense? Does to me.

Everyone is posting about how to cut costs

2009-11-12T10:06:00.006-05:00

I'll admit I'm not the best at it. Some of these are pretty much common knowledge but in a community like mine where people have not/will likely not ever feel any kind of economic slow down, what I do might sound a little radical.

1. I buy store brand products. Dish soap, laundry detergent, paper towels,lotion, even shampoo and soap. Target brand oatmeal soap costs 2 dollars less than Aveeno and my hypersensitive skin doesn't know the difference. Walmart Claratin works for me too. I've never been obsessed with name brands anyway. And that includes clothes and shoes.

2. I do my own nails and toes. People where I live assume that everyone just has loads and loads of money on their hands. I sometimes get asked where a good place is to get a manicure. I always get a surprised look of disbelief when my reply is," I can't really say because I do mine myself." The response is always,"Well I just don't have the time to do them myself." Yes you do! You have the time to get dressed, get in your car, sit in the salon for at least a half hour and then 15 to dry so don't tell me you don't have the time. I can do my nails and toes in less than 20 minutes and if I do them at night while I'm already winding down, I can let them dry while I watch tv without worrying about messing it up. So the best place for a mani-pedi? My house for free.

3. When I buy meat, I'll buy the family size even though I only cook for 2. I cook what I need and take the time to portion the rest out for the freezer. It takes just a few seconds.

4. Library Library Library! There's a GREAT library a five minutes walk from my house. They have a take-leave magazine shelf where I leave all my old magazines(old meaning from last month) and there's always a few National Geographic Mags I can bring home. There's hundreds of DVDs and I might have to wait a couple weeks before I can read the newest books if I don't get there before everyone else but I don't really care. I see a lot of smart moms/dads with kids when they have story reading(I do better voices than the lady they have but she does ok) and what a great place to bring a kid . My favorite part-it's FREE! I used to spend so much money on books I'll never even read again. They also have a used book store where I can get great art books for 5 dollars.

5. I am not snobby about going to the matinee movie on a rainy day. It's raining anyway! I have friend who won't step foot in any theatre before dark for fear of looking like a senior citizen at 32. The whole idea of spending more to please other nameless faceless people who care more about themselves than 'you' is a whole blog post for another day. I will stay mum on whether or not I sneak in my own drink.....

6. I commented about this on another blog and I'm sure I've posted about this before. I hang dry most of my own clothes. That goes for the husband's clothing too. I have pieces that I bought years and years ago that still look new because of this. This is not practical for everyone but, I live in a condo so I use my shower curtain thingy(I can't think of the right word) as my clothesline. I only use my dryer for towels and blankets. Well socks too. So imagine this saves a little on the electricity but I can't really say because I live in hot Fla and it costs a fortune to keep our 3rd floor place bearable in the summer. But my clothes last a long time and I don't always need to run out and get something new for this or that. Obviously the shopping part is more fun but I stay away from trendy clothing so I can wear anything in my closet when in a pinch. I'm moving to a better place in the near future so hopefully our elcetric bill will go down. For real this time. I take really good care of my shoes too.

7. I got asked this question last night(by someone like me whose husband works and they don't have kids) so I feel like I need to tell everyone about it: "who walks your dog?" I DO. Um yeah.

How do you feel about the Holidays being sprung upon us so quickly?

2009-11-11T21:16:00.004-05:00

I noticed Christmas stuff at the grocery store today. Usually I get irritated about how early stores start putting out Christmas stuff. Oddly, today it made me happy. I stood there for a long time wondering if I should also start early, buy a cinnamon broom or one of those little bears with elf shoes one. I almost bought red and green Hershey's kisses until I remembered my still left over Fun Bag sized Mini Milky Ways I've been trying not to eat. I even started to hum songs from my Chipmunks Christmas album I had when I was in kidergarten.

On my way out, I had a hard time leaving because my car was blocked and I couldn't back out. I couldn't back out because some people who had just arrived were having a conversation with someone else who happenned to still be in her car. They decided a good place to have this conversation was right behind my car after they had watched me put my groceries in the back, get in and turn the ignition. Usually I just wait a few seconds when this happens but today I beeped. I beeped because I had just ran 2 miles and was eager to get home and eat lunch. They still took their time in getting out of the way, probably because they thought it was rude of me to beep. So, whilst waiting, I remembered why I get irritated at stores during the Holidays and forgot that I had just decided to be happy when I arrived. Yup.

Blue Angels

2009-11-06T18:18:00.000-05:00

I took more but Blogger only lets me do 4 at a time and I'm really impatient right now. Enjoy these and I'll post some more later. Click on them to make them bigger.

Happy Halloween!

2009-10-31T15:35:00.003-05:00

Hope everyone is having fun. Eat a lot of candy corn and enjoy the jack o' lanterns.......The Pea family is handing out chocolate. Stay safe everyone and have a good weekend.

Reunited and it feels so good

2009-10-29T14:05:00.005-05:00

I finally got my haircut today. It's been since May but it really didn't count as a real haircut that time because I got this genius idea to try an $18 dollar place. Never again. My sister whose hair is the same length and texture as mine found a place where she lives that charges $18 without a wash and blow dry and she LOVED it, swore she'll never go anywhere else, told me I should try it out here where I live since it's a chain. I've been looking for a new place to go because I got really sick of paying $75 for someone to cut my long, straight, easy to cut hair because the girl I'd been going to for a long time ran off to Minnesota(of all places to run off to). I went to a spa place a few times and I really liked it, I even got a massage there last year while I was recovering from being off my meds for all that time and I was sore. Then another owner took over and turned the place into redneck heaven. Mind you, I love the south. I consider myself a southerner by preference and I can turn on/off my accent when need be. But when I get my haircut or any kind of beauty treatment, I don't want to feel like I'm in the middle of a HeeHaw rerun. I'm not exaggerating. They got some kind of 'company vehicle' , to advertise and impress the customers. Yeah. Hot Pink Hummers with sparkly rims don't appeal to me as a client whatsoever. If this makes me a snob, then I'm just a snob. The stylist I was used to just dissappeared one day and when I asked which salon she moved to they wouldn't tell me, I think because they were hoping I would just say ok, who else is avaliable. No thanks. I was only putting up with the hard core blue grass music and the yelling profanities back and forth between the mother and daughter owners because I liked the way she cut my hair and her price so this gave me an excuse to go somewhere else. Before that I was going to a woman who only charged me $25 and she was really good. I loved her but she decided to become a real estate agent(in this market when I have all this hair dammit!) so again I was a style orphan. Which brought me to the place my sister told me to try. Yeah. The guy they put me with was greasy, his nails were filthy and he smelled like an ash tray that hadn't been cleaned out since the days of Studio 54. And he barely cut anything and what was cut was lopsided. And he charged me $35, not the $18 my sister had me all excited about. So remember the stylist I "broke up with" that one time? In a moment of weakness I decided to go back. Best decision ever. I don't know why I ever fell out of love in the first place. Well ok I know why. It was expensive and I always felt pressured to buy ridiculously priced products when I was done. But oh man did I have beautiful hair once upon a time and it was because of her! So I had to go back. I had to. Why did I not see that before?! I mean, I get a haircut maybe 2-3 times a year. Why should I feel guilty about it? So maybe the shitty economy is actually good for something because it didn't cost me as much as before(although it was still a little pricey but I need to stay in this moment a bit longer). And all I did was say no thanks when a product was suggested for me to buy. Oh to have pretty hair again. It was beginning to look like I had just been kicked out of the Garden of Eden.

How much is too much to spend for a haircut to you guys?

Mr.Pea

2009-10-25T21:48:00.010-05:00

I don't mention him much because, and this is a good thing but, I'm still one of those wives who, after 12+ years can still gush like an obnoxious teenager in love and it probably comes off as sappy if I really get started. I would just get on your nerves, trust me. But since I never post about him and I feel like posting a few things, so dammit I'm going to. In list form.

~Even though we got engaged in December and married in March, in my true heart I consider November 5th our real anniversary. Here's why-- he told me on November 5, 1996 to remember that day for the rest of my life even if I never saw him again and to remember this advice: "never let anyone take advantage, treat you badly, or take you for granted, even me- especially me, because you deserve happiness." You can imagine the kind of jerks I had dated up to that point because that was the first time a man other than my father had ever said that to me. I knew he was the one.

~ The summer before I met him I was severely under weight and constantly sick with sinus infections, brochitus, flus stuff like that. My doctor was concerned that I had an eating disorder and told me to gain 15 pounds and start eliminating whatever stress was in my life that was causing me to lose so much weight. So I did and I really did get better. Fast forward a few months of me being healthy again and in a serious relationship with my then future husband. I confided in him about how self conscience I was about my very necessary weight gain and he said(with his French accent mind you),"What are you talking about? I don't like a too skinny girrrl. I like belly on girrrl. Gain more weight then. Let's go eat right now." Why am giggling writing this? See I told you...sapsapsap (By the way I don't truly know if what I was going through was a "textbook" eating disorder because I did research and none of the symptoms really fit me except for the fact that I was severely underweight. To this day I don't know what that was. Stress maybe? Who knows! Once I gained the weight, I stopped getting all those sinus infections so I kept the weight on and decided to just be healthy.)

~ For about a year and half he worked in California during the week and flew home for the weekends. One day he called and pretended that, for some reason, just realised he didn't remember how small my feet were and was "just wondering what size they were" for no specific reason. You get where this is going? That's how bad of a liar he is. He brought home two pairs of shoes for me as a "just cuz" gift. This was almost 10 years ago and I still have them. His taste is that good. I mean he bought me these last Christmas. And you see, it's not like the gifts were just because we were still newlyweds, he's still like that.

~ When I was "fresh out of surgery" I was having a really hard time. I won't go into the details since over the past couple years I've talked about all the complications so blahblah I had a really horrible surgery to remove cancer with horrible complications blahblahblah. My heart rate was too high and I was in and out of conscience. The thing I remember the most was him holding on to one of my fingers. I was somewhat aware of it and in my drugged state, I felt that his holding onto my finger was the only thing that was keeping me from falling off the Earth. Obviously he didn't know it at the time but he told me later that he held on to my finger for so long because every time he let go, my heart rate would go back up.

~ He never acts jealous. PERIOD. This is such a PLUS because I hate people who act jealous and I would not be in a relationship with someone who didn't allow me to breathe. PERIOD. I could come home and say, "I'm sorry I'm so late but there was this monkey in the road who needed my help so I had to drive him to the store and buy him some Hershey's kisses for his friend the sea lion who lives in that purple shack downtown and we had to go pick him up too because the fish from Utah were in jail so naturally we had to go bail them out before we headed to the strawberry parade. " And he would say,"Omigosh are you ok? Sit down a bit then, you're probably tired."

~ This is going to sound silly for a second but go with me on this one. There's this line in a Al Pacino movie from a while back ago. It's a football movie, I think by Oliver Stone. It's not my favorite movie AT ALL, I'm not really a "football girl." But it's my favorite line because in the movie Al Pacino plays a football coach and he's trying to convince his quarterback, who's been injured and is now ok to play but is really scared to play again. The player says to him,"I'm scared coach." And Al Pacino says something like,"You can do it. Come on we can do it. Me and you. ME. AND. YOU." Anytime there's an uncertainty be it sickness, economic, anything, everything,whatever---that's what I think about when something comes up. That line.
ME. AND. YOU. And that's they way it will always be. Or I think it's You and me, but you get the point......

Random happenings

2009-10-22T19:40:00.003-05:00

-"Mon Cheri Amour" was playing at Starbucks today when I went in to "sugar up" before my routine blood work(I have to do this because they sometimes take 4 vials,which really doesn't sound like much.But it's a lot when you're 4'11".). I forgot how much I liked that song. But I only like it when Stevie Wonder sings it. Everyone else just sounds like a cheap imitation.

-I have a bruise on my arm(again) from the bloodwork. Why is that? Some people just have the best hands and never even leave a mark on my arm. And then some people leave big purple dots on my inner elbow making me leave the band aid on for the rest of the day lest people at Target think I'm a drug addict or something.

-I got in touch with the very first girl who befriended me when I first moved here in the 3rd grade. We haven't talked in at least 13 years so it was refreshing to hear an old friendly voice. Don't you love old friends? Old friends just know things about you and you don't have to explain anything.

-I had to force myself to leave the tv off today. Bad news of that poor little girl who was murdered and thrown in the trash had me crying all night last night and I knew it would be all over the news again today. I pray for her mother and family who must be going through hell right now. THE STATE OF FLORIDA IS NOT DOING ENOUGH TO PROTECT INNOCENT CHILDREN FROM CHILD PREDATORS! What kind of....ok I was about to write the word animal would do something like this, but then I thought no that's an insult to animals. I can't use the word human because someone who woud do something like this is not human. Why did this happen?

I forgot to show you guys this

2009-10-18T11:25:00.004-05:00

While I went Naples last month, we spent a day in on Marco Island and there were a lot of birds of prey. MrPea bought me a new camera for my birthday last July so it was a good opportunity to use it and I got these two great shots of this Bald Eagle. I am not very happy with her conduct, I have to say.....she was harrassing a pair of osprey's, trying to steal their fish, looking beautiful the whole time though. I think I'll get a good zoom lense this Christmas so I can get some more good shots like this. Click on them to make them bigger. I'm still learning how to use my new camera because it has a lot of bells and whistles but these two shots aren't bad for a beginner don't you think??

Me and Horses

2009-10-16T21:19:00.005-05:00

This post was inspired by Des.

Growing up, like every little girl, I always wanted a pony of my own. I don't really need to point out why I never got one. It's the same reason 99% of little girls in America never got one. That didn't stop me from dreaming about it though. Looking back, it's probably a good thing considering one or two of my encounters with a horse. But before I tell all about it and you guys start thinking I should just stay away from all animals let me tell you a couple good things:

My Grandparents had this big beautiful magical farm with trees and hills and raspberry picking and catching fireflies and cookouts and loud crickets and everything great you could possibly imagine a kid would find amazing on a farm. I could fill a thousand pages with beautiful memories of that farm. My Uncle had some land adjoining and his cows and horses were sometimes close enough for us to see. We used to save our fruit and carrots and walk down to feed the horses in the evening. I was always a little scared so I would just hold on to my Grandma's arm when she fed them my carrots so that they would know it was "from me" even though I wasn't really feeding them. Ok, that's a good memory right?

The year I was 16 I went to live with my Grandparents on that very same form for a little while and everyday I had to walk down this rock road home from my bus stop. I would pass a field of the most beautiful brown horses I'd ever seen. I used to call out to them or sing to them, anything to get their attention but they always ignored me. Until one day I was walking by singing as usual and one beautiful mare with a white diamond on her face came up to me. She put her face as close as possible so I took it as an invitation to pet her. I stood there petting her a minute and then they all came to say hello. After that day I used to save the fruit from my lunch to feed them and they would walk next to me as far as the fence would allow. Another good one right? They liked me.

My first apartment was near a really big storybook looking church and there were a lot of weddings there. One particular day I looked out my window and there was a big majestic black Clydesdale horse with one of those Cinderella coach thingies. I went out to take a closer look and ask the driver(they're called drivers right?) if I could say hello. He said it was ok as long as I didn't make the horse excited because he was acting nervous that day. Just imagine my bragging voice," OMIGOSH OK? I have so much experience with horses don't worry." So I started to pet the horse and suddenly I feel a burn on my knee and realize I've just been stung by a bee. I started screaming, "OMIGOSH HURTS! HURTS! IT BURNS!!!" The driver got so mad at me. Luckily for me the horse didn't get upset but pretty much looked at me like I was complete idiot. (Yes horses make faces, ask anyone.)

A friend of mine, after high school graduation, moved out to the country with her boyfriend and bought a horse named Pixie. Pixie was a youngish, spoiled beautiful blonde mare and we liked her mane and tail braided with pink ribbons. My friend had this genius idea that she would teach me to ride since I had told her before how much I loved horses from afar and Pixie seemed to like me. Another genius idea she, well ok , WE had was that she would teach me English style riding and that since I was so small and light, I would learn how to jump fences and we would enter local amateur contests and just kick everyone's asses. Sounds real smart huh? We were serious. One winter day I put on some old jeans and dirty Keds and told her I was ready. Ok just for the record, even after falling off several times, I mastered the Trot and Canter and I looked cute when I tried on the outfit. Since we were feeling really cocky because I was really doing well, she decided it was ok to just let me practice on my own all the way back to Pixie's stall. Well Pixie decided not. She just up and decided to just start running like her ass was on fire and here I am clicking the Trot and Canter click, but it didn't work. She didn't want to Trot or Canter in the pretty way we showed her. She wanted to run. I had to let go of the reins and throw my arms around her neck. This seemed to make Pixie really happy because she started to run faster after that. I was begging her to slow down or stop but I'm telling you this horse was enjoying my horror. We got to really busy street and she decided to stop in the middle and kick her leg a few times and buck a little just to scare me some more. I was still holding on to her neck and asking her to stop. She decided to run like hell a little bit more. I saw a fence getting closer and closer and closed my eyes because I just knew we were going to go over whether I liked it or not. Instead of jumping over she decided to turn and run next to it instead. I said thank you for not jumping over Pixie and gave one last try to pull as close to her bit as I could to make her stop. Thankfully she did but not for long while. I slid off, and even though I was PISSED OFF at Pixie I needed to put my arms around someone and no one was there so I put my arms around her and started crying. I think she thought it was funny because she was acting really happy when we hosed her down. Bitch. I still brought her apples but we were never good friends again after that. My friend said not to hold a grudge since Pixie was so young and she probably really enjoyed my attentions because I was much lighter than the people she was used to carrying. Thanks but no thanks. Needless to say I never became a champion horse jumper, or whatever they are called. So much for our great idea.

I made friends with some horses in Canada but because of Pixie, I never got an a horse again. There's a local stable that rents out horses every summer and you can ride them on the beach. I keep thinking one year I'll do it. But then I'll change my mind. Pixie ruined any horse adventure I would ever have.

Fun at the Dentist

2009-10-15T14:02:00.001-05:00

I had a filling replaced today. I had so much fun.

Kindergarten, church, and new friends

2009-10-12T16:13:00.005-05:00

Today was my read-aloud-to-a-really-squirmy-kindergarten-class day. I mentioned last spring that I started covering for a person who for whatever reason couldn't do it anymore. It's only twice a month so I said yes when I was asked to do it again. The person in charge of coordinating the whole thing told me they always have a hard time finding people who are willing to read to the younger classes. I sort of expect kids to act squirmy so it's not a big deal for me to read for 20 minutes if it helps out the always thankful looking teacher and librarian. They call me Miss Angel, which I've told you guys, makes me blush. There's usually some one's shoes to retie, a lot of hands raised to use the bathroom, giggling, poking, pinching, and every once in while someone will yell back at one of the voices I'm using for the book characters.(Yes, I told you guys, I do the voices. They like it and it keeps their attention! I had to do mean pirate voices this time.) Today there was a lot of shushing but not on my part. Two boys had to be separated because they are BFF and get into trouble whenever they sit together. By the middle of the second book I noticed them inching towards each other and giggling. I know I'm supposed discourage them when they don't listen to the librarian, but I can't help it. They make me laugh. One girl in blond pigtails asked to use the bathroom. Suddenly the whole class had to use the bathroom. The librarian said no so I had to say no too. I felt a little bad about that. By the end of my last book one of my kids interrupted to ask me if I knew how to make puke noises. I said,"Of course." I did refuse to make fart noises.(I mean I have to draw the line somewhere.)This caused a huge ruckus of giggling and the librarian told them all we had to hurry up so that they would have time to check out their own books before their teacher came back. I really should be more strict with my kids because I can tell the librarian thinks we're too rambunctious but I like them that way. I want them to enjoy their time with me. I love reading and when I was kid I loved having books read to me. I hope that my being there, making it fun and not so structured for them will somehow teach them that books can be just as entertaining as video games and silly cartoons.

I got to be in a parade at my church. Well it wasn't really a parade, it was more of a procession. There were about 70 of us and we each had to to hold a sign of a particular ministry we were representing as we walked down the aisle to music for 2 different services. My sign was "weekend renewal." I'm glad no one asked me about it because I wouldn't have known a thing to say since I didn't know anything nor have I ever participated in the "weekend renewal" . Up until five minutes before I was assigned that particular sign I didn't even know we had a "weekend renewal". I only said yes I would do it because a new friend of mine was holding a sign too and we wanted to be in the parade together. And yes I did enjoy the attention. I tried to hold it "Price is Right" style. I'm expecting any day now to be told how my involvement was so impressive that thousands of people signed up for "weekend renewal" and that it was the largest fundraising in history. Yup.

Speaking of my new friend, don't you just love meeting a kindred spirit? I met a really funny woman who totally gets my silliness. I knew we would be friends when I saw her at my book club with her leg propped up on another chair because she had an ankle brace on. Over the ankle brace were some really cute high heels. She knows what's up. That is totally something I would do and you guys know how I feel about shoes. I said to myself, my kind of woman, we are totally going to be BFF.

I'm sorry guys! I should've said something sooner

2009-10-10T19:58:00.006-05:00

I got a few emails asking if I was ok. Well yes I'm ok. I'm not going to say I've been too busy, I hate when people say that. I've just been having a summer: we went on vacation again and I got a couple sinus infections and doing my volunteering things and trying to work out more and my best friendforever came in town so we had to gallivant and I had to catch up reading for my book club and I started taking a class and also I was anxious about some Doc appointments that I had to get mentally prepared for with routine bloodwork and I've been trying to start painting again-that took up alot of mental energy and Peanut got sick so...it sounds like I've been too busy but I wasn't. I just took a break from the internets and the bloggings and all that stuffs. Sorry. I've missed you guys.

Oh I left out the shark teeth expeditions. Yeah. There haven't really been any big storms so I don't really have anything to gloat about but there's been a lot of that going on. The search is just as good as the find I think.

BUT! I do have something else I can gloat about. MY DOCTOR SAYS I CAN HAVE A BABY ANYTIME I WANT TO NOW! HA! Don't expect any announcements about it for a while. We have a few things to do before I can think about that. I can still tell you guys how ecstatic I am about that possibility though can't I? Why yes I can. I've been gone so long I forgot I can say whatever the hell I want to. And let me just say that was the best news ever. Usually I'm always getting crappy news from her so this time I was able to leave with happy tears not sad tears. I wasn't even expecting any kind of news since it was my routine visit. But things were looking so good, she said I don't have to do any body scans for a while and that all was safe. Ok I'll just admit right now that I've been sitting here trying to think of something more to say about this topic but I can't cuz all I can do when I think about is giggle.

OK!? Are we still friends then? Cuz I feel a little guilty that I've neglected my blogpeeps. Say yes or cuss me out. It's ok.

More pix from my trip

2009-08-06T09:17:00.003-05:00

I'm probably boring everyone with my vacation pix but I don't care. This isn't even the rest. I have a few more for next time so just deal with me for a couple more posts. ok . Ahem. Where was I? Oh right. Ok so here's a picture of a crab on a tree. Nothing special but I'm learning how to use my camera for close shots and he looked like a willing model.

This was where the inlet let out. There were people swimming but I wouldn't dare. The water is pretty murky and like I said before there are definitely some sharks and I wouldn't be surprised to see an alligator.

Rare photo of Mr.Pea. He never lets me take his picture so when he's in a generous mood, I have to take advantage of the oppurtunity.

Again I was experimenting with the close up functions.

This would make for a good drawing I think.

I noticed this sign telling everyone what was not allowed on the beach and at first I was happy about it until I saw this! And I'm not quite sure what this park had against my Peanut but apparently he's not allowed nor are any other Jack Russel Terriers. How dare they discriminate against my Peanut!

I took this while on my morning walk. MrPea was still sleeping so I put on my shorts and went for some excersize.

This was taken on Sanibel Island. There was a seaweed bloom so the water wasn't as clear as it usually is but MrPea was trying to find some shark teeth for me. No luck. I did find a couple in Naples but that was it. I did find out the name of an island where I could go next time to find some for sure but I'm not telling anyone the name unless they live in Florida.

A storm was coming on as the sun was setting so of course I had to get some more practice with my camera. Not too bad huh?(This was my birthday btw)

Our view was pretty great. We ate breakfast on our balcony every morning. We're going back to the same place in September and it's all we both talk about lately.

Dear Gucci Sunglasses:The sequel

2009-08-01T14:44:00.008-05:00

Dear Former Object of Desire: Gucci Sunglasses Model Number 2933,

Remember Me? Remember how I loved you, longed for you, yearned for you, waited for you? Remember how I could never pass you by without trying you on in the hopes that we might someday be together? Remember how I begged for you to go on sale so that we might make accessory magic together? Or did you forget? You must have because you never went on sale, you never went below the $200.oo I begged you to do. You couldn't have done it just for me could you? 2 years I waited, former beloved! 2. effin. years! See how patient I was? But no you still have to stay up there don't you? $207?! That's the best you could do for a girl who loved you so much?(yes, you read that right, love-d) You thought you could tease me like that and get away with it? Did you not believe me when I said I refuse to pay more than $200.00? Were you toying with me? Did you think you could break me? Did you think you could make me give in for a mere $7.00 over my ultimatum(plus shipping-don't forget that!) price? You have mistaken me for someone who likes to be played with, Beautiful but not infallible Gucci Sunglasses! Because guess what! There's a new love in my life. And his name is Jimmy Choo.

Yes. What did you say? Speak up louder hunny. Oh you're saying that $195 on Amazon isn't that much better than your lame sale price? Well guess what else, former love of my life. I picked these up for $109.00! Yes I did. I took him home with me and we're very happy together. And just to make it sting a little more, I found him in the same store I met you.....don't cry. Oh you're begging me now, how sweet. Well it's been fun being led on and teased by you for these last couple years, but I've moved on. Now if you think you can match my Jimmy, we'll talk. But until then you can watch me walk away from you with my newer and cuter sunglasses and think about what could have been. No regrets. You can't say I didn't warn you.

Good Riddance,

Angel/Queen of patience and bargain shopping

PS Jimmy Choo also has better shoes than you too. Just thought you should know....

So I finally figured out how to upload pix from my new camera

2009-07-30T15:33:00.007-05:00

Sorry I've been away so long. It took me a while to readjust after coming home. Peanut had an eye infection so I had to take him to the doctor. I was also trying to learn how to use my camera a bit more. Anyway, here are a few pix:

This was the view from our balcony. Not bad huh? See how there was a waterway between us and the beach? The coolest thing about it was this was all protected so you have to walk through all that via a half mile long walk way. Or you could take the golf cart shuttle the hotel provided but I prefered to walk...more on that later.

This is what it looks like when you actually get there. What I like best about this beach is that there were only a few people there! If you look closely you'll see where sea turtle nests have been marked for protection and you know I was happy about that. This was the view looking north.

Just cuz I like things nicely balanced, this was the view looking to the south. And again my favorite thing about this beach was that it was empty. Some people don't mind crowds and noise on the beach but I like the quiet.

This is the walkway I mentioned. It was aproximatly 3/5ths of a mile or .6mile through a mangrove forest and over a bridge but I'll have to show you that later. The bottom is made of recycled material. It was slippery that day because there was a storm the night we arrived.

Mr.Pea prefered the golf cart shuttle but I made him walk that time because I wanted to take it all in. Does he look sad and pitiful to have such a bossy wife? Actually in the mornings, he slept in and I would wake up early and go walking. There were more than a few people jogging and power walking. To me this is even better than jogging on the beach. I find it absolutely impossible to jog on the beach. I just can't. I can't imagine walking around on a beach without looking for shark teeth, it would be a complete waste of time. Ok honestly, it would be torture.

I spotted this White Heron fishing when we got to the bridge so it was a good oppurtunity to practice my 'skills' with my new camera. I just realised I probably should taken a picture of the bridge to give ya'll a better idea but I wasn't thinking about this blog at the time....

This was the view(north) as we crossed the bridge and you can see someone had a good idea and brought a kayak. I would be too scared since I am absolutely certain there are sharks in that waterway and very possibly alligators. This is usually where young sharks live since it's safe. Actually we called waterways like this "shark nurseries" in my Marine Biology class. And if there are baby sharks in there, it mean Momma sharks are in there birthing them or whatever they call it. You know what I mean. I don't remember what time of year they do this but still, I know they're there. Waiting for my leg. I imagine I'm missing out on a lot of good teeth but I'll stay alive a little while longer thank you very much.

Oh! And I almost forgot. If you click on this pic and look really close at the pink thing on the right, it's a flamingo! It was the only one I saw. I have more pix but I'll post them tomorow.

2009-07-21T08:44:00.001-05:00

Today's my birthday!

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2009-07-19T18:22:00.001-05:00

My view!

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Off to Naples

2009-07-19T09:50:00.003-05:00

(The Florida one not the Italian one)

I woke up early to drop Peanut off at his "camp" and I might as well have just took a knife and stabbed myself in the heart. He didn't seem to care about being separated from me it which was actually what I was hoping for but still..... Oh well. It's a nice place, despite the fact that it costs a damn fortune, and they have dog cams so I'll be able to check on him while I'm gone. Still though. Next time I'm going to bring him with us.

Anyway, I'll be gone for a few days. Tuesday is my birthday btw. I'll be 33. Lots of pix when I get home.

Again I have no title for this post but does it really need one? Does everything in the world need a title? I think not.

2009-07-13T11:45:00.005-05:00

I finally got over what was the worst sinus infection I ever had. There's nothing worse than being sick when it's over 90 degrees outside. Normally I grin and bear it through something like that but this was really a nasty one. One day during the peak of the worst, I was in the middle of merely making a sandwich and got exhausted just from that. I won't go anywhere near anyone who even has barely a sniffle right now. MrPea's and my trip is coming up in a few days and it's been so long since we went away together, I don't want anything to ruin it.

I thought about posting a few more pix from my trip but I'm sure ya'll aren't interested as you can pretty much guess from my last post what my trip consisted of:two silly sisters and three little boys under their sometimes questionable influence. I'm hoping to try to get back up there around Halloween.

In the mean time, my birthday present(!) arrived early(Thank you MrPea, I couldn't be happier!) so I've been trying to learn all the bells and whistles. Eventually I'll get a strong zoom lens when I begin to figure out how it all works. The basic auto stuff was pretty self explanatory but I didn't know what the hell an aperture was or what a macro lens was for and what ISO stood for but I'm having fun with it. Peanut has been my study subject matter and I'm sure he'll be happy when I start pointing that camera towards something else.

Speaking of Peanut, he has an appointment tomorrow morning at a Pet Day Care since I have no one to take care of him while we're gone. We need to take a look at the place he'll be staying and I want to make sure that he'll be comfortable and well taken care of there. It will also be a good time for them to observe his behavior around other dogs so they'll know what to expect and what kind of dogs he's compatible with during playtime. He's not a fighter but sometimes a humper so hopefully they won't hold that against him. Our ex roommates had a Yorkie who easily put him in his place when he tried to put the moves on her so I'm sure he'll behave once he figures out that the ladies don't like to be treated the way he treats his 'bear'. My standard reply to people who get surprised over the fact that he is actually neutered is usually,"Well he is a man."

Home Sweet Home

2009-07-02T18:00:00.002-05:00

I had a good time. I miss my nephews and my sis. This picture pretty much sums up my trip and looking at it kind of breaks my heart. I'm not sure why fate saw fit to place these people so far away from me.

My flight was delayed last night so I got in really late. I also caught some kind of head cold which seems to always happen when I travel but oh well. MrPea and I were supposed to go on our own trip this week but we decided to go the week of my birthday instead. Until then I'll be nursing my cold and catching up on my sleep.

Just a few things before I leave on Sat

2009-06-25T16:31:00.004-05:00

-I found a Power Ranger Tshirt size 5T. It's a size too big but I had to go on a damn oddessy to find it so that baby is going to have to just wear it anyway. I got souvenir tees for the older two but the little one said he likes Power Rangers so I had no choice. I went everywhere. Two different Targets-no Power Rangers. Walmart-nothing. Bealls-nope. Kohl's-uh uh. Kmart-nyet. Finally I broke down and went to the mall. Luckily, I found a Disney store and they had some. Crisis avoided. Go Power Rangers!

-The Disney Store. Um. Yeah. If you haven't had kids yet and were even contemplating the idea of pushing one out, don't go there. And for the record I feel sorry for/hold the utmost admiration for anyone who is so cursed as to have to bring a child there and doesn't end up in a straight jacket. The employees seem to know the inner demons that will be unleashed in kids upon stepping foot into that store and take advantage of it. I saw one following a poor mother around making all kinds of suggestions while the woman, who BTW was clearly on the verge of some kind of emotional breakdown, just said, "yes yes we'll get those honey," just so her kid would calm down. Yep. It's not going to be a destination for the Pea Family when I push one out. I said it. Write it down.

-The baby birds are gone. Should I be worried about that? I mean they were getting bigger and all but I can't believe they would be big enough to just fly away. Is it possible that the mother moved them to a different nest? Does that happen? Please don't say a cat got them. I mean I know it's a possibility but it would be hard for me to believe since no one in my building owns a cat and I doubt any stray would have found them. Plus I'll be heartbroken so I'll have to pretend they didn't like the noise and just moved. The nest is still there in perfect condition. I'm going to have to investigate. Their location was at the LadyNextDoorWhoHatesMe's front doorway so it's going to be hard for me to get some answers from her. I better not find out that she did something like complain about them living in her wreath.

-My trip(s)! My trip(s)! My nephews don't even know I'm coming. I don't know how my sister and I kept this secret for 3 weeks without slipping, but we have. I think she's planning to load them into the car by saying, it's a nice day, let's go for a drive. Oh man, they're all going to get pinched on the belly. One by one. MrPea's and my trip South was postponed until my birthday so I'll be home Wednesday instead of next Monday. I was dying to look for shark teeth down there, but I guess I can wait. I'll try to post while I'm gone but if I don't I hope everyone has a Great Independence day and a safe week.

Random Pix I forgot to show ya'll

2009-06-22T09:51:00.007-05:00

Actually I did already post my cellcam version of this one a while back ago but I'm thinking about making a drawing of it to go with my shell in the hand drawing.

It was alive so of course I put it back in the water that day. I even stayed watching it for a long to time to make sure it didn't get pushed back onto the sand by the tide. I couldn't let it go without pausing to snap a picture of it's blue and peach side. I'm sure I've looked up the name in my field guide and forgot it's name but my field guide happens to be in the other room and I happen to be too lazy to get it.

Look close.

Closer....see him now.

Yes it's a him, I checked. Unfortunately for him something had already made a meal out of his belly. His color pattern is really pretty and this will definitely make for a good drawing. I haven't decided to use pencils or watercolors for this one.

This is a Southern Toad that Peanut got into a fight with. I freaked out because he's ended up in the animal emergency hospital for getting into a fight with a poisonous toad in the past. So I took a picture of this one so I could identify it and make sure Peanut was not in any danger. He must have tasted really badly because Peanut spit him out right away and started shaking his mouth. Luckily for Peanut that was the only discomfort. MrPea was to blame since he was the one holding the leash(for both times.) His pattern is really pretty too but I'm not a big fan of bumps.

And, as promised here are the baby birds I have been admiring. As you can see the mother bird made a safe nest on a shell "welcome" wreathe. She was there all the time when the eggs were not hatched yet but now I never see her. I was beginning to worry but the chicks are getting bigger everyday so she must just be busy. Click for a closer look.

They are even bigger than this now- I checked on them this morning. I only counted 2 but I'm never close enough to really see because I don't want to scare them.

Last week while using a restaurant bathroom I noticed a very important communication. Take note of it peeps, you might need this information some day:"James is hot." "I agree." I'm not quite sure who this James is but if I find out, I'll let you guys know.

And last but not least this was taken last night at 8:30. This is not my beach, it's been too HOTDAMN for me because the wind is still coming from the west. I wanted to look for shark teeth over here but for some reason, there aren't really any here. If the wind doesn't change before I leave on Saturday then I won't be able to look for any shark teeth until next week when low tide is in the evening so it won't be any fun. But the midsummer evening sky is pretty don't you think?

I got something

2009-06-18T08:44:00.007-05:00

Yes I did! Got it from Chani, who's blog I adore. And I'm supposed to pass it on but I'm not going to since only 3 people read my blog anymore. (That's all my fault) If you're still here, and you wanted that award for yourself, by all means honey take it. Because if you
are still around after my only posting about once a year then in my opinion, you ARE Lovely.

Now that I'm done bragging about that, I have to steal an idea from Chani. Well technically it's not really stealing since she got the post idea from someone else too right? It was 6 things that make me happy. At this very moment. Ya'll already know about Peanut, shark teeth, the beach,shoes, pinching earlobes, my nephews, pinching my nephews earlobes, ok just pinching in general- all that stuff. So I'll tell you about some different things that make me happy. Today.

1. And this is in no certain order. This is going to sound weird but Exercise makes me happy. Yeah. I can't believe I said that. But it's true. When I am exercising on a regular basis, which for me means 2 or 3 times a week, I'm in a better mood. I have more energy and I sleep better. I also don't have those "I hate my body" voices in my ear so much even if I don't notice a difference in the mirror. Because I feel like I'm actively doing something about it. Saying that I have to admit that the getting motivated to get up and go exercise is still hard for me. But once I'm in the middle of it, I do get that high everyone talks about. I used to run but now I just power walk about a mile and a half. I find my knees and ankles ache less since then.

2. There's a bird nest on a wreathe next to one of my neighbor's front door and I can't even tell you all how happy that makes me. I spotted it a couple weeks ago and at first I thought it was decoration. Upon closer inspection I saw a tiny bird in it that I still thought was fake. Until it flew out and freaked me out. So I try not to scare them but there's chicks in there and I make a point to pass by on my way to my work out to check on them, trying my best not to scare the mother. MrPea teases me about it and says if he saw a giant face in the window every afternoon, he'd probably want to relocate but I can't help it so I just peep quickly and then go. I'll post some pictures when I can of them.

3. ok I know I said I wasn't going to mention pinching since I already told you guys about that before but I can't take it anymore. I have to. Pinching makes me happy. Yes it does. I love to pinch my loved ones. I have to keep it to a minimum because most people don't like to be pinched but I can't help it, even Peanut gets it once in a while. And the fact that I'll be at my sister's house a week from Saturday...oh man. My fingers are already in a pinching position. My nephews are going to have their earlobes and bellies pinched and that's just the end of it. I'll probably pinch my sister's earlobes too. Because that's the way I roll.

4. Photos. Taking them and looking at them makes me happy. I really love taking pictures but I also really love looking at people's photo albums. I'm always the only one who says yes really enthusiastically when someone asks if I want to see the 500 photos of their kids. If they have 500 photos of their vacation that no one usually wants to see, I do. I think you can learn a lot about a person from the photos they take. So yeah, photos. And since I mentioned my nephews, we'll be taking a lot of pictures too. Too bad, they're just going to have to smile and say cheese whether they like it or not cuz Auntie likes to take pictures.

5. MrPea and I are planning a trip and I'm so excited about that. We haven't been away together in a long time so it will be fun. There's really no need to make plans to go vacation when you live in Florida, I know that. But ever since that winter I spent in Canada I've had separation anxiety. I spent such a long time away from home that I never wanted to leave home or go anywhere without Peanut. So now that the reservations are made I'm getting excited. It will be fun. I'll be taking lots of pictures then too.

6. Lastly, I mentioned this the other day but this really makes me happy and it's my damn blog so I can talk about it again. My doctor told me a year and a half ago not to have any babies for 2 years and I cried for days over it. But now that it's been a year and a half, I'm thankful that the time is passing by because January will be the last time I have to take radioiodine for at least five years(keeping my fingers crossed that the scan will be clean which is %99 likely) and it will be safe for me to have a baby. heeheehee I get all giggly just thinking about it. But ok like I said, I'm not to dwell on it anymore. That's the last you'll hear about it from me. For a while.

So there you go. Feel free to steal this post since it was never my original idea in the first place.

Still around

2009-06-16T09:05:00.002-05:00

I had some routine bloodwork done last Friday and found out yesterday for sure that I am not anemic. For now. Which is good. I still haven't heard from my endocrinologist but I imagine things are going well because she's of the freakout variety so I would have heard something by now if there were anything to freak out about. I have yet another yearly appointment with my "girly" doctor today that I'm trying to get "mentally ready" for. Lately I've been having a lot of pregnant dreams and I think it's because I know I've hit my year and a half point into my 2 year "safety wait". Hopefully by next January, I'll know whether or not I can....ok I'm not even going to talk about it anymore.

In the meantime. I'm getting ready for my trip north to visit my sister and nephews and also MrPea and I are planning a trip to the Gulf Coast. I can't wait to find some shark teeth there and hopefully a megalodon tooth if I can get over my fear of diving! I haven't been out to the beach much because it is HOTDAMN and there has been no seabreeze in my parts so I'm waiting for the winds to change. It's been hard because low tide has been just right but ever since my thyroid was removed, even though I'm taking a hormone replacement, I can't handle the heat as well as I used to. Oh well. I don't mind so much that it's over 90 but when it's over 90 and no wind on the beach, I just can't. I don't leave until the 27th so I'll be around peeps.

Always be our Baby no matter what your age

2009-06-07T08:15:00.004-05:00

Happy Birthday Little Jr! 20 years old and this is the way I will always think of you. Is it any surprise that I'm the one who took this picture? We were in my room I told you to make your best Teenage Mutant Ninja pose. I'm so proud of who you grew up to be. As long as I'm breathing, you will always have a cheerleader on your team. All 6 of the grandchildren in our family are loved. No more, no less than each other. But you were the first. And the special thing about being the first is that we loved you the longest. Keep on being who you are.

Tips from Pea. The beginning of a new era of knowledge from me to you.

2009-06-06T10:00:00.004-05:00

Back when I actually posted more than once a month I had quite a few emails asking for beauty tips. This was pretty funny to me since I am 4'11" so I'm obviously not in the running to be America's Next Top Model. Also I didn't start wearing make up or really care about my hair until I was about 25 but, ok. I don't have very many beau-tay secrets but I do have a few misc. tips and product reviews I can pass on to anyone who might be of a mind to ,er,want to know. Feel free to add your own or shoot mine down but here are a few to tide you over until next time:

1. I hate bugspray. I hate the smell of bugspray. I live in Florida:mosquito breeding ground of the USA. Solution for this problem is Avon Skin So Soft bath oil. I buy it in a spray but the lotion works too. One squirt on my hands is enough to rub on my legs and arms without feeling like a greasy frenchfry. It smells good and for some reason mosquiters don't like it. Buy it. Try it. You won't regret it.

2. I have sensitive skin. I also break out easily. I usually hate most face products aimed at sensitive skin because for some reason everyone in the "skin" industry assumes that people with sensitive skin also have bone dry skin thus creating the heaviest, oiliest face creams that I would only buy if I somehow mutated into a lizardwoman and decided to live in Death Valley. Aveeno Clear Complexion is my go to. Now I've told you. Now you know. Rejoice in that knowledge and spread the word.

3. Ok the Baby Powder in the hair trick. I've heard of this before. Yeah it doesn't work. Don't do it. I tried it once because my hair was flat and oily and I didn't have enough time to rewash. Um. Yeah it just made me look like I had BABY POWDER IN MY HAIR. Maybe my hair is too dark for that trick but I'm not going to dye it just to find out.

4. I drink skim milk because I like to put half and half in my coffee. This isn't really a "tip" of any kind but it's something I do that makes me feel better about how heavy I like my coffee. I play several mind games with myself like this. I feel skinnier already just from telling ya'll.

5. Feet. I have to talk about them. Those of us who spend our lives in flipflops know the horror. Vitamin E. Not the gel that's sold in drugstores in the summer time-although that's pretty good for scars. The cream. Right now I have the BJs store brand and that seems to work well. Vaseline under your socks over night is a squishy thought but trust me, it works.

I have thousands more but I'll have to ration it out, peeps. All 3 of you that are left :O)

2009-06-02T14:30:00.001-05:00

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Random blah blah blahg

2009-05-27T12:42:00.003-05:00

-I read to my little kindergartners yesterday. I love how children's books are always about loving yourself just the way you are, believing in yourself, making new friends and listening to your parents. How old do we get when that stops being the important theme in literature? The book I'm currently reading for my book club is about murder, political intrigue, war atrocities, with a twist of psychotic love triangle. The last book we read was "Cry, The Beloved Country," and that book almost emotionally did me in. It thoroughly broke my heart. Our next book is one by Dostoevsky. I'm out of ideas for this paragraph so I'll have to end it with a request. Anybody have any good suggestions for a more lighter read? Something happy? I do love my book club but I need something less dark. Speaking of my book club, someone in mine has a Kindle. I'm so jealous I can't even concentrate. Why why why do they have to be so damn expensive? I'm either getting one or a better digital camera for my birthday. Which would you choose?

-I saw 'Star Trek' and 'Angels and Demons'. Both were very good. You don't have to be a Trekkie to dig 'Star Trek' and you don't need to have read the book to enjoy 'Angels and Demons.' 'Angels' did run a bit long but there's a lot of info to get in and you feel like you've been on a trip to Rome. The style of the movie was a bit less book report-ish than "The Da Vinci Code"(loved the book ,hated the movie) so it was smoother, to me.

-I found the Holy Grail of pants for petite women at Ann Taylor Loft yesterday: pants that don't need to be tailored. That fit. Yes. Life is good once more.

-I saw a picture of an old boyfreind the other day. One that was mean and cruel and horrible to me for three years. I have no malice towards him in any way, I'm the one who let someone like that in my life. After saying that, I have to admit something. It gave me just a tiny bit of happiness to see that he hasn't aged well. He's overweight and balding. Not that there's anyhing wrong with being overweight or bald. But he's the one who told me all the time that I was fat and ugly(at the time I weighed 95lbs). Karma. It's a good thing.

-So ok I've been posting less and less these days. I have no excuse. Last week it rained EVERY. SINGLE. DAY. So I can't say it's because I haven't been home. Laziness.

Kindergarten

2009-05-16T09:10:00.011-05:00

My kindergarten teacher's name was Mrs. Fukumitzu. She was mean. Most people have fond memories of kindergarden. Holding hands in line, finger painting, singing abc's and I have a few too. Only a few though. Because I also have memories of Mrs. Fukumitzu screaming at us that if we didn't quiet down, she was going to turn herself into a wicked witch and boil us in her witch pot. Now call me dumb if you want to, but at five years old, I believed her. In fact I really did think she was a witch. The woman should not have ever gone into any career involving children because she obviously hated children. We were all too scared to even ask her if we could use the bathroom because she would roll her eyes and I had heard from my brother, who scared me with stories of The Exorcist movie, about how eye rolling is one of "the signs". I once got in trouble for jumping up onto a sink to hide from one of my little friends after lunch. When Mrs. Fukumitzu came into the bathroom and caught me, my punishment was to climb onto the wooden chest we kept our dress up clothes in over and over again because according to her,"Since [I] was so good at jumping and climbing, let's see [me] do it until [I got] tired of it and maybe then [I] would stop being such a bad girl whose parents are probably ashamed of." I'm not joking. That's what she said. Of course at first it was fun but then I got tired. After what seemed like an eternity I was so tired and I began to cry and beg Mrs. Fukumitzu if I could sit in my seat with promises to be good for the rest of my life. NO. She made me keep climbing up and down on that wooden chest until I said I felt like throwing up, which was not a lie because as I had mentioned, this happened right after lunch. This was not my only incident but you get the point. I used to always fake a stomach ache, hoping I would have temperature so the school would be forced to call my mom and I could go home. We lived on a military base and my dad was at sea for most of that year so I had no one to yell at Mrs. Fukumitzu for being so mean to me. My mom was always shy around my teachers.

But it wasn't just me. People in my extended family always seem to think that we were all raised spoiled but it's not true, we were raised in extreme strictness and that's putting it mildly. So I was a pretty good kid. And I wasn't the only one who feared that woman. Remember how I just told you we were all too scared to ask if we could use the bathroom? I overheard the teacher, who's class was next door to ours and shared our bathroom, comment one day that it seemed like an awful lot of children from our class got sent home for peeing in their pants. Yup.

Which brings me to one reason why I've been gone this week. I have a little volunteer thing going on at a local elementary school. I read books in the school library to kindergardners for about 20 minutes and then hang around to help them check out books for another 20. They are as squirmy as I imagine I was and there's a lot of giggling and poking and pinching and teasing and talking out going on. But at no point do I feel like scaring the bejeezuz out of any of them by threatening to turn into a witch and boiling them all in a pot. Of course I only spend about 45 minutes with them but thier teachers for the most part seem sane and thankful to me since my being there gives them a break. I get a lot of hugs and smiles and chubby fingered hand holding which, to me, is the key to all hapiness. I also get to be addressed as "Miss Angel" which for some reason makes me blush. And since everyone who knows about it has been asking me: yes, I do the voices when I read and no I'm not embarrassed to admit it. I would've made an awesome kindergarten teacher. Way better than Mrs. Fukumitzu.

This should explain my absence

2009-05-14T22:32:00.000-05:00

Earth Day(and Thursday)

2009-04-24T08:56:00.022-05:00

High tide has been in the afternoon this week so I've been trying to get there as early as I can. I can find shark teeth no matter what but when the tide is low, obviously there is more beach to work with. And I've always liked exploring the tidal pools. There are always some kind of fish or other animal that gets stuck and has to wait for the tide come back in to return to it's home in the waves. Wednesday I expected to run into all kinds of varmints since last weekend's shoreline was full of really deep tidal pools. For some reason the beach was flat that day. But I did find a few live things.

Since it was Earth Day, I have to bring attention to this plastic bag that was washed in. Apparently some anemones had attached themselves to it and were now stuck. I would have detached them from the plastic and given them a good throw back into the waves but unfortunately for them, they were all dead except for one.

This one. So I gave him a good throw and put the plastic full of dead anemones in the garbage. Hopefully this guy didn't get washed back in. I have to preach a sermon here so bear with me. People please do NOT bring plastic bags or plastic ANYTHING to the beach. Sea turtles, that are highly endangered mind you, mistake them for jellyfish and suffocate. So I get livid when I see plastic floating around. Or just plain throw your trash in the garbage. It can't be that hard, probably an extra few steps. I don't go to your yard/neighborhood and throw my trash there so kindly don't do it on the beach please..... or anywhere for that matter. How lazy does one need to be who can't clean up after themselves? This is disgusting. When I see people doing that, I can only imagine what their home looks like and whether or not they keep themselves clean. This really shouldn't be an issue. This is the only planet we have to live on. Remember that.

Ahem, ok moving on I found this shark egg case. And you know it made me really happy. It was empty so hopefully that means it hatched and will grow into a big shark whose teeth I will someday find...

Turning it over, I saw that it too had an anemone attached so, of course I threw it back into the water. Actually my day was full of that: finding stranded anemone and sea cucumbers, feeling sorry for them and throwing them into the ocean, hoping they they don't get washed back in before high tide. To do otherwise would have made me feel bad. What can I say, I'm a big softie for animals, even the ugly ones.

According to my field guide, this is Green Fleece algae which I had mistaken for Dead Man's Fingers. The latter name sounds more interesting doesn't it? But I like the shape even if it is a little slimy.

This looks like a pile of throw up. It is actually what's left of some kind of tube worms. That yellowish spiral shaped looking thing are egg cases-unhatched. It looks disgusting doesn't it? Yeah, I threw it back in the water too, gross. I had no choice. The tide was coming in at this hour but what if it didn't come in fast enough to keep the eggs alive? I would have felt responsible.

Another shark egg case or stingray egg case. And yes, I was happy about this one because it was empty too. I've heard them called Mermaid's Purse, which is a cute name. You can see dead tube worm remnants attached to it too. No anemone so I left this one alone.

These next few pics have an interesting story. As you can see in the first 2, this in an osprey that has caught himself a really big fish. He was having trouble holding on to it when I noticed and started taking pictures.

You can barely see in the one above but I used my computer to zoom. You can see how huge this fish it caught was.

Too bad, he dropped his big fish. Here he is looking for it. I love ospreys. The black stripe across their eyes make them look so badass. I imagine they work as sunglasses to help with the glare from the water while they are fishing. There's a pair who live in a pine tree across the lake from my building that I'm always watching. I wondered if this was one of them.

I was so busy admiring his beauty, as I always do, I almost didn't notice an even bigger fish or small dolphin jump out and I'm assuming grab MrOsprey's dropped fish.

I looked around to see if anyone was there so that I could say OMG!DID YOU SEE THAT!?? But, as always, there's never anyone there when stuff like that happens. I wrote later in my journal that every time I get a private glimpse of nature's beauty like the one I had Wednesday and I realize I am the only person on Earth who got to see that, how thankful and privileged I feel. Of course it would have been better had I been quick enough with my camera. dammit

< I stood there for a long time smiling, hoping that big fish, which was either a small shark or juvenile dolphin, would jump out and flip again but no luck. But the only ones who missed out were you guys because I left that beach with a huge smile on my face which lasted for hours.

These pics were taken Thursday. This is a juvenile Willet. My guide says they "probe for coquina clams and mole crabs" and there plenty of those around.

< It was as if she knew I was taking her picture because she turned around and stood up straight.

< Thursday's tide line was full of tide pools this time, which makes looking for shark teeth a bit less challenging because the water acts as a magnifying glass. I saw what would've been a really pretty snail shell(Lightning Whelk) to add to the collection on my window sill. But as you can see, it already had an owner.

< Another person would have simply detached this guy and took the shell home and I'm glad I didn't. Because I looked it up in my field guide and this is a hermit crab anemone. These 2 species live together in cooperation trading travel for sting protection. The hermit crabs they live with are known to take their anemones with them when they upgrade to bigger shells. They are total BFFs

< I didn't see any legs sticking out of this shell but it's highly likely there was a hermit crab in there so I'm glad I put them back in the tide pool. I took a pic in case no one believed me. It was a pretty shell but I'm not that selfish.

<

As you can see my shark teeth finds were not wonderful but so what?

Peanut is everyone's favorite nap partner

2009-04-22T11:21:00.005-05:00

Speaking of naps. No nap for me today even though I only slept 3 hours last night(because I want to go to the beach). In fact for the past week or so I haven't been sleeping much either. I beg the heavens that I don't fall into the hell that is insomnia. I get a little neurotic when I know I'm not sleeping enough because I'm still a little traumatized from when I was 17 and was only able to sleep 3 or 4 hours a night. It lasted a few months and was only cured when we had to flee what we thought would be a head on hit from a really big hurricane. So we drove up to to West Virginia to visit my Grandparents for a few days. The hurricane ended up in the Carolinas, as most hurricanes did that year, unfortunately for them. And my insomnia went away, fortunately for me. Odd, you say? I had a similar experience the summer I turned 14. I. COULD. NOT. SLEEP. It lasted about 2 months. At the end of the summer just before school started, we went to visit my Grandparents and somehow it just went away. I was able to sleep again. Are you sensing a pattern? Obviously being around my Grandparents made me feel relaxed, peaceful and I just fell asleep as soon as my head hit the pillow. But they are no longer in this world with me so I can't just buy a ticket to West Virginia and cure my insomnia as before. What should I do? I don't sleep well when I'm on vacation either, in case anyone was going to suggest a trip.(I would like to go on vacation though...there's a river in Central Fl where I can dig for megalodon teeth.) There is only one other place where I always sleep like an infant. That is in Canada, in my mother-in-law's guest room. BUT, my damn passport is expired and anyway, a ticket there costs a damn arm and leg because you have to catch the special plane from Montreal to get to MrPea's hometown whose airport is smaller than a 7-11(which, strangely, is why I love that place so much). You know the kind with the propellers that you can't bring heavy luggage on? Yeah that one. It adds about 4oo dollars to any cheap ticket anyone could find and I'm too scared to drive on the scary, bumpy mountain road. Sigh.

And I feel like I need to note that the 3 hours I did sleep last night were filled with horrible nightmares. I'm not stressed out, I don't think, so it can't be that? I don't eat at night so it can't be that? Maybe the beach will cure my problem.

Anyone have any ideas? The non medicated sort....what do you do, Internets, to help yourself sleep when you need the rest?

(Oh! And Happy Earth Day btw. Pictures of how I celebrate our Earth Home tomorow)

Take a nap!

2009-04-21T17:43:00.000-05:00

'Yer Age

2009-04-17T13:04:00.002-05:00

Whenever I catch myself doing or saying things that when I was a kid I swore I would never do, I feel like such an Old Hagggis. For example, my nephew is nearly 20 and I still treat him like a baby. Since I was the baby of the family I HATED being told I was too young for something or treated like I was a complete idiotic and naive child.(I'm still treated that way and I still hate it BTW) When my nephew was born, I was 12 and felt completely grown up so it seems that I would probably feel more sisterly towards him than like an Auntie but that's not the case. He is to me, the son I would have asked for if I had had the powers. I try very much to regard him as a grown up but it's impossible. Last week, he came over for lunch and I found myself reminding him 3 times not to touch the pan because it was still hot as if he were a total dumbass without the skills to notice that on his own. I still refer to him as "Little B--" which is what we called him as a baby since he shares his father's name and his father was then called "Big B--" Recently I asked him if it bothered him that we(meaning mostly me) still called him that and if he knew that we would most definitely be calling him "Little B--" even when he was 80. Didn't bother him and no, he said he likes it. This was funny for me because I've told my family several times if anyone tries to refer to me in one of the nicknames they came up with, no one would get an answer from me. I will only answer to the name I was baptised with thank you very much. But that's the difference between he and I. If he told me it bothered him, I would make a better effort to stop.

Anyway, I'm getting off topic-that's a post for another day. For sure, one of the things I SWORE, PROMISED, SET IN STONE FOR ALL TIME that I would NEVER do was utter any sentence that began with the words,"When I was your age......." Because when I was young enough to be so cursed as to have to listen to those kinds of sermons I still remember thinking how much I could give a flying rat's ass about "yer age," and what everyone did or didn't do at "yer age." Or what everyone had or didn't have at "yer age." I didn't give a featherweight's care about who had to walk to school, stay after school, clean the school, make dinner, couldn't wear their hair the way they wanted, got slapped if they talked back, got soap in the mouth, had to eat everything on their plate, never wasted anything, had to plow, had to finish chores on time, rode horses, never heard of computers nor needed them.....you get my point. Still, I have begun to catch myself saying those very words to my own beloved eldest nephew. As in, "When I was yer age, we didn't have ipods. Do you have any idea how lucky you are?" Just shoot me now.

Put your ear here

2009-04-12T17:33:00.006-05:00

Hear anything?

I found this big whelk shell the other day and it was like Christmas for me. Not so much because of how huge it was but because I happened upon it whilst thinking of a drawing I've been working on but hadn't quite been persistent enough to finish. There it was rolling in the waves when I saw it and ran towards it before someone else saw. The barnacles are dead by the way, otherwise I would have given it a good throw back into the ocean so as not to commit "barnacide." And lucky for me. It's now gracing the tile floor next to our fire place.

My drawing was based on this photo I took back in September when I found this whelk shell in very much the same way I found BigMama up there.

I was so inspired, I finally finished it last night.

As you can see I took some licence in aligning the horizon because I felt like if I drew it as it is in the photo it would look, well, badly aligned. I couldn't fill in the rest of my hand because I'm not good enough at doing hands thus that triangle of empty space but it's my drawing so I don't really care. I also need to get a frame that covers up my thumb because I was told that it would look too much like a male naughty part to those with dirty minds....do you like?

Here's the rest of my find from that day in case anyone was full of suspense. That diamond shaped thing is actually a bone from the head of a Sheep's Head fish-I think. I'll have to look it up. And as you can see I found a Great White tooth so double happiness for that day.

I couldn't end this post without showing you peeps the dead jellyfish which is, by now, the tradition over here so here you are.

Still on the mend

2009-04-07T15:09:00.006-05:00

I really was starting to feel better Saturday when I posted. Then Sunday I woke up and my throat felt swollen again. I thought it must be allergies but I just started to feel worse and worse. Finally last Tuesday I broke down and saw my doctor who told me I had a sinus infection and double ear infection. So I've been on antibiotics since then and I feel so much better this week. I can't go in the sun though so I haven't had any beach time but I've been too tired for all that anyway. Last night was the first night in about 2 weeks that I got a really decent sleep. So I'll be good to go in a couple days. I'm beginning to feel like an indoor cat though.

MrPea has been lucky enough to avoid catching my germs and getting sick(knock on wood!) himself. I only have two days left of antibiotics which is good because I keep forgetting to take them on time.

I'm thinking about changing pharmacies and I'll tell you why. One of the pharmacists who works there talks really loud about people's personal issues. Last month when I went in to pick up my birth control pills, he exclaimed upon printing out my receipt,"Look! You have a coupon for free pantyliners!" Then last week when I had my antibiotics filled, he told me,"You should go next door(grocery store) and pick up some yogurt. It may help you to avoid a yeast infection." Now mind you there are about 5 senior citizens standing behind me who, I'm sure, don't want to hear about my hypothetical yeast infection. Mistaking my wrinkled nose as a distaste for yogurt(which I do have but that's not what it was for) he said,"Oh well, if you don't like yogurt that's fine. You can always pick up a box of Monistat from right over there if you end up with a bad yeast infection. Oh and don't forget to put on sunscreen." Wonderful fun isn't it. I'm not sure if I should just put up with it because I like the Head Pharmacist or flee like my arse is on fire to another Drug Store next time. He does this to everyone and I can tell some folks like it as a lot of the seniors in my neighborhood will talk to me, a total stranger, for hours about the matters of their colon and hysterectomies and all kinds of personal health issues. I'm more of the variety that likes NOT to talk to people I've never seen in my life about regular bowel movements, fiber intake and vaginal health.

While I'm on the subject of yogurt, I took Mr.BigMouth's advice and bought some. It was my first time and ohmigosh ya'll, it's as disgusting as I had suspected all my life so much as to avoid it for 32 years. Gross! My husband loves the stuff which is surprising to me as usually I'm the healthy eater and he hates all things nutritious in our household. He told me since I love sour things such as lemons, Key Limes, tart mangoes and sour candies so much that I should love it. NO. I. DID. NOT! Here's why: those above mentioned fruits and candies are supposed to taste that way. Because they are fresh. Yogurt tastes sour because it is milk that has gone bad. Do I sound like an 8 year old who won't eat her corn? Well in so many ways my culinary tastes never evolved past that age and I'm not ashamed to admit it. And I'm not ashamed to admit that I would rather get a yeast infection than eat yogurt. Yep. Sorry Yogurt lovers, I couldn't get on that bus with you guys. I tried and it just didn't happen for me.

Now I laugh like a hyena everytime a yogurt commercial comes on tv. All those women look like me. I am their demographic. Well I can tell you, I was not making all kinds of orgasmic faces and giggling blissfully, spoon in hand. And have you noticed they are all usually doing yoga or wearing a yoga outfit? An advertising exec somewhere out there probably got promoted for coming up with that. "Yo-ga, Yo-gurt. Hey it's almost the same word! Women will be pushing down the doors for this stuff!"

I hate when people tell me,"Oh honey, you just need to get used to it." Why would I ever need to get "used" to something that tastes repulsive is beyond my intelligence level. Next time someone says that to me, I will ask if they could ever get used to being slapped in the face. No? I didn't think so.

BTW if this post sounds like a rerun, it pro'lly is. But as I've said, I am MsKitty looking out the window, not being allowed to go out into the wild like I so want to so creative thought has escaped me for now.

I've been in a drug induced haze

2009-03-28T15:10:00.003-05:00

But not the fun kind you're probably thinking....I'm finally getting over a cold that started last weekend. Usually I don't like to take anything because cold medicine either knocks me out completely or makes me extremely nervy. But luckily this week I had nothing on my to do list so I wanted to get as much rest as possible. It wasn't that nasty of a cold but everytime I start to think I'm feeling better, get up and start to do something, I suddenly feel exhausted and weak so I've been trying to just do as much "nothing" as I can. Did you miss me? I thought so.

I got some more info on my new volunteer task. It's twice a month for one hour. I go in and read a couple books to a kindergarten class in the school library and then sort of hang out with my little kids helping them pick out books to take home. There's only a couple months left in the school year so if I decide I hate it I don't have to to it next year. But I'm sure I won't , I love reading to squirmy little ones. I even like doing the funny voices and sound effects. I'm waiting for my background check to be done. I've never committed bank robbery so I should be approved soon. I'm excited.

I was a little hurt because someone had made a comment about my volunteering at a school where the children already come from well to do situations. That I should be volunteering at a "worse off" place where more help is needed and implying that I was being a hypocrite for not doing so. But I don't feel the least bit guilty as I'm not quite sure that criticising a person's choice to volunteer at all is even called for. Sure a homeless shelter or food bank probably needs a lot more help than a well funded elementary school but location and transportation was the bigger issue. I could volunteer at a place that really needs an extra pair of hands and not really be able to commit because I can't be sure about whether or not I can really be there. Or I can volunteer at a school within biking distance and show up every single time they need me, giving an already overworked and underpaid teacher a small break. Does it really matter so long as I'm actually doing something? Or should I just say that I'm going to do something in front of everyone at a political meeting but do nothing but complain and criticise?! Who's the hypocrite?( and I know you're reading this even though you pretend that blogs are so beneath you....)

Ahem. Moving on, I'm feeling much better but I have that weird cough I always get after a cold/flu that takes forever to go away. I stopped taking cough medicine. I think it's messed up my thyroid hormone pills because I'm hot all the time. The only thing that seems to work is really strong Starbucks mints.

Outer Space Random

2009-03-16T12:45:00.004-05:00

We watched the shuttle go up last night from our patio. I didn't think to get my camera until it was already gone but here you see the trail it left. I have to say last night's launch was the prettiest I've ever seen because the sun made the exhaust glow red. The screen is in the way but I was too lazy to walk downstairs. Enjoy.

I have been asked by some new friends at my new church to read stories to kindergartners for an hour twice a month. I said yes since the school year is almost over so if I end up hating it,which I'm sure I won't, I'll only have to do it a few times. I'm not sure why I'm feeling so shy about it but I am. I tried to talk myself out of it but everyone told me it would be a perfect volunteer opportunity for me and easy. I'm still waiting for the details but wish me luck in the meantime peeps.

The weather's been great so I have been at the beach every spare moment I have. It's not quite warm enough yet to just walk around in a bathing suit even though I do see some tourists swimming(!) in that cold water. But it's sunny enough to get a few more freckles if you're not careful. I've been using SPF85 but the freckles still come. Nothing wonderful report regarding my shark teeth finds, I loathe to admit. My finds have been meager. Yesterday MrPea and I went to the beach together. Normally this isn't something notable since we go all the time but we usually go to a different beach where we can park since MrPea doesn't have his own bike. We both went on my bike and I'm sure you're not wondering who was lucky enough to ride on the handle bars. It was cold so we had to huddle into the sand when the sun was behind a cloud and he made me promise not to go off and look for shark teeth just for that one day. I'm assuming he thought if I started looking while he waited, he'd be there 5 hours later watching the south horizon for me whilst freezing his behind off. He'd be right. I was dying though. There was a lady a few feet away from us digging around and I was pouting,"She's finding stuff, I know it. She better not find anything!" I'm selfish. When we left I walked past the hole she dug to see if there was anything of interest for me. Nothing. I'll probably be like this until the water is warm enough to wade in, this is how I find the good stuff. My friend Dee thinks I should seek some help.

I've started a new drawing. I'll show ya'll later.....

So what's new with you guys?

I can't think of a title for this post

2009-03-10T10:25:00.007-05:00

Who needs one for a day like this anyway? Can you see a few people stole my idea and are looking for shark teeth. HAHA! They went the wrong way though. All the shark teeth were to the North, and I got them all for myself.

This speckled crab appeared to be stuck. Actually at first I thought it was dead but I noticed him moving when I came to take a picture. I tried to help him but I didn't want to get pinched. I thought best to let the tide do it's job with this guy. What a beautiful pattern.

I don't know if he was really a male or female but I was too scared to pick him up and look. He was ornery so I designated him as a male myself :O)

I found more teeth than this but I took this picture during my snack break and I was too lazy to take another pic so you'll just have to take my word for it.

My Husband Meme

2009-03-04T11:56:00.005-05:00

Someone sent this to me on Facebook a couple weeks ago and I figured I would do it now since my anniversary is on Saturday.

1.He’s sitting in front of the TV: what is on the screen?
Depends on what time of the day it is. Regular day hours during the week usually the news, sports, or shows we watch together-war,history documentaries, HBO series, stuff like that. Nightowl time, usually CNBC or real estate shows.

2. You’re out to eat. What kind of dressing does he get on his salad?
He never orders a salad but I would say vinaigrette depending on the restaurant on the rare occasion he gets one.

3. What is one food he doesn’t like?
Fish

4. You go out to the bar. What does he order?
We don't really go to bars so I don't know um, Jack and coke?

5. Where did he go to high school?
in Quebec, Canada

6. What size shoe does he wear?
10 I think. I've never bought him shoes

7. If he was to collect anything, what would it be?
Does money count? He's not really a 'hobby' kind of guy. OH! I know electronic stuff.

8. What is his favorite type of sandwich?
He's not really a sandwich kind of guy either. Maybe a French Dip, I guess.

9. What would your Husband eat every day if he could?
Pasta or Pizza, actually he does.

10. What is his favorite cereal?
Honey nut Cheerios or Honeycombs

11. What would he never wear?
Oh he's picky about clothes like I am. When we go to the beach he's barefoot. I've never seen him wear flipflops, as much as he surfs-go figure. I'm pretty sure spandex goes without saying but I'll just put that out there too. He dresses good, I'll just leave it at that.

12. What is his favorite sports team?
College teams-Miami Hurricanes, Florida Gators

13. Who is his best friend?
That's such a highschool question! So I'll answer it with his Highschool
best friend: his name was Roger and he was troublemaker. Pronounced Ro-jay in French. Just say that name around my mother-in-law and she'll start rolling her eyes and thanking the Virgin Mary that they are no longer hanging out.

14. What is something you do that he wishes you wouldn’t do?
He says all the time that I'm too smiley and that's why I attract so many weirdoes but I don't think he would want me to stop being smiley. He thinks I'm too nice to people.

15. How many states has he lived in?
5-Florida, California, Louisiana, Colorado and Hawaii but he didn't grow up in the US obviously

16. What is his heritage?
French and his family name means "strong as a Turk" because his ancestors were crusade era warriors...I don't remember how I found this out but his dad was pretty pleased when I told them this.

17. You bake him a cake for his birthday; what kind?
I'd rather bake him a pie. His mother's Brown Sugar Pie recipe is usually my go to for special occasions.

18. Did he play sports in high school?
No, he went to an all boys Catholic school and there were no sports in this school. But I think outside of school he played basketball and baseball...I think.

19. What could he spend hours doing?
Surfing.

This didn't ask me what my favorite thing about my husband was. One of my favorite things about him is the fact that he is secure in his masculinity. He's not concerned about whether certain things make him seem "manly enough" or not "manly enough". He's also not one of those types of guys who are embarrassed in front of his friends when it comes to his feelings for me. I can't stand guys who act one way in front of his friends and another alone because he doesn't want to be accused of being "whipped". Sounds highschool don't it? That's because it is, but there a lot of people out there who still behave that way and I'm glad I'm not married to one of them. I also appreciate the fact that he cares about his appearance even though I tease him about his vanity.

Feel free to tag yourself. Add Boyfriend if you're not married, no one will punish you :O)

My nook

2009-03-03T14:05:00.006-05:00

I am not an organised person. MrPea is an organization freak. I'm a creative dreamer. He's an analytical thinker. Most creatives are kind of on the messy side. And most engineer types are pretty OCD when it comes to organizing. Do opposites really attract? In this marriage, yes.

It has taken me a long time to get my little work corner nice enough to actually do some work in. It started out like this when we first moved in:

Then somehow I figured out that I needed to clear some things away. As if this looks any better. Obviously this was still not a space conducive to creativity. Who in the world would want to sit there and work? Not I.

Finally, I have just the way it needs to be. MrPea bought me this on Valentine's day. Are you imagining all the masterpieces that will be created in this space? Eventually I will get a new desk but until then, I feel like I can sit there all day without getting irritated at the way everything is falling all over the place.

If only I could get him to clean up after me everyday. Is there a button for that?

No thanks....

2009-02-24T08:51:00.002-05:00

Sunday afternoon we had an appointment to see a condo for rent. Condo is just a glorified word for apartment, I'm not quite sure why people still get all excited over those kinds of words but, ok. Anyway, the lady showing it to us described it over the phone as spacious, immaculate, gourmet kitchen, sunny and honestly she used the word beachy at least 4 times. So she opens the door and the first thing I noticed was a smell. No it did not smell like dog, I have a dog. It smelled like spoilt milk. The "spacious" rooms could all fit into my living room and the "gourmet kitchen" was well.....let me put it this way. If you're reading this, stand up right now. Put both your arms out all the way. Spin around. That's how small it was. Yeah, it was beachy. Meaning you would want to spend all your time at the beach and not in this tiny, dirty, smallest kitchen in the world, overpriced condo.

Oh and by the way, she said it was on the first floor. It was not on the first floor, it was on the second floor.

I'm pretty sure I've already done this

2009-02-23T12:21:00.006-05:00

But someone sent me these questions and told me to answer them. I'm in a 'follow the directions' type of mood so.....

1. Do you like blue cheese? hell no

2. Have you ever smoked? Yes what a junior high question! But not since I was 20, now I think it's disgusting.

3. Do you own a gun? This is a trick question....if I say no, all the psychos out there will know I don't have one....if I say yes, all the psychos out there will know I have one. That's about as much answer as I'll give.

4. What flavor Kool Aid was your favorite? Purplesaurus Rex but they stopped making it so then it was cherry.

6. What do you think of hot dogs? That they are disgusting.

7. Favorite Christmas movie? Charlie Brown but it's not really a movie.

8. What do you prefer to drink in the morning? Coffee in the winter, orange juice in the summer.

9. Can you do push ups? Yes but not that many.

10. What's your favorite piece of jewelry? I don't really care about jewelry that much but I guess it would be my pearl earrings my husband bought for me in Hawaii. They are kind of heavy and make my ears bleed sometimes because the posts are too big and I hardly ever wear earrings anymore. But they came in a red Cartier box with some official looking paper and I know big names appeal to his elitist tendencies so he was pretty happy to buy them for me.

11. Favorite hobby? reading, looking for shark teeth, still art....Hobby is such a weird word you know? I like doing stuff but I feel like an 92 year old using the word "hobby" for some reason. Let's just say I like doing "stuff" then.

12. Do you have A. D. D.? No....why am I giggling?

13. Do you wear glasses/contacts? No

14. Middle name? Marie

15.. Name 3 thoughts at this exact moment? My feet are effing freezing. I don't feel like doing dishes. I need to exercise today.

16. Name 3 drinks you regularly drink? water water water

17. Current worry? Economic meltdown banking crisis. Seriously. The fact that my husband works for a major bank should be all the reason I need to be in a state of worry.

18. Current hate right now? I already told you guys this but :The guy who lives downstairs is always revving his loud, obnoxious motorcycle all the damn time and especially every single time I decide to have a nice peaceful cup of coffee on my patio. And for reasons only known to him this noise needs last 20 minutes thus ruining my peaceful patio fun time. But hate is a strong word. I don't hate him, he just gets on my nerves. Hate...hate who/what do I hate? I hate carpet, there you go.

19. Favorite place to be? Looking for shark teeth. Canada's nice too. Miami's kind of fun.... now see this isn't good question for someone like me because I don't really have many favorites. If I like something, I just like it. And I don't put things in order of how much I like or don't like.

20. How did you bring in the new year? Kissing my husband.

21. Where would you like to go? Anywhere. Back to Hawaii I guess. OH I know. Remember when I told you guys about my Grandpa's plane being shot down in WW2 and he and his mates survived on an island for a long time with the help of the native people? I don't really have a desire to GO there but it would be nice to maybe say thank you for taking care of my good Papa to someone-anyone who may be old enough to remember. Yeah that would be pretty cool.

22. Name three people who will complete this: Whoever. Wants. To.

23. Do you own slippers? Yes but they have holes so I have to buy new ones.

22. What color shirt are you wearing? Cream

25. Do you like sleeping on satin sheets? Um. I don't know. Probably not, that sounds too 70s tacky for me. Do they still make those?

26. Can you whistle? Yes and when I first learned how I used to get on everyone in my family's nerves because I would just whistle all the time. I was 5 so....

27. Where are you now? In front of a computer of course!

28. Would you be a pirate? Well being as I'm not a big fan of pillaging and plundering, maybe not. The clothes and boots are kind of cute though.

29. What songs do you sing in the shower? Marvin Gaye is fun to sing in there but pretty much anything.

30. Favorite Girl's Name? I don't know yet

31. Favorite boy's name? I'm superstitious about names, I just am so I'll just say I don't know yet for this one too. Again with the favorites thing...

32. What is in your pocket right now? phone number for a real estate agent

33. Last thing that made you laugh? don't remember but it happens all the time Oh wait I remember but you guys are going to think I'm mean. Ok I'll tell you anyway: Last night me and Mr.Pea were watching House Hunters and we started making fun of the houses they were "hunting" for and the way one of the guys on the show was swinging his arms around. It's dumb I know but that's what I was laughing at. My husband has a smartass sense of humor that sometime rubs off on me.

34. What vehicle do you drive? SUV

35. Worst injury you've ever had? pulled leg muscle(knock on wood) oh yeah, does spider bite count?

36. Do you love where you live? Yes but there are different ways that answer can go like- do I like this area/town/state , yes. Do I like where I live as in structurally? That would be a not really.

37. How many TVs do you have in your house? 2

No one is tagged and I feel lame for even doing this because I'm positive I did this before.

Who's laughing now?!!

2009-02-22T18:24:00.008-05:00

I never leave home without a camera. This is something I get teased about a lot because I like taking pictures and I guess it gets pretty old hanging out with someone whose either constantly pausing to take a snap at any little silly thing or constantly in your face to take a snap of you. But I'm glad I do because:

Look who decided to grace my church parking lot with his presence this morning....

Can't see him? Click on this one. It's almost the time of year when I start seeing them here and there. Although it's a couple weeks early, I've read that they scout around this area for nesting during the month of March...or is it they start hatching in March? Ok I forgot. But it's usually the month of March I see them around, so this one's early for me. But my hospitality knows no bounds when it comes to critters such as these so I'm glad he's early, I hope he stays a long time, and I hope he told all of his Bald Eagle friends about how nice family friendly it is here and they all come and have lots of baby Bald Eagle chicks so I can have more sightings to brag about. Or at least have more chances to get a better shot once I get a better camera. I'm pleased to say that this is the third or fourth Bald Eagle I've seen so far this year and it's only February.

Oh I can't tell you how much I was wishing for a better camera with a good zoom when I saw him. But now no one can say how silly it is to need a camera 24/7. He was so beautiful. See!? I told ya'll Spring was knocking on my door. It's officially Spring for me when I start seeing them, no matter how cold it feels.

<

HA!

2009-02-20T09:46:00.005-05:00

I got a call on Tuesday about my scan results and....drum roll please...it came out clean!! No cancer tumors, no funny tissues, nothing around my liver, nothing in my uterus. It's about damn time! This was my first clean scan since my surgery two years ago and I can't even express how happy I am not to have to do radiation again. Last year was the sickest I had ever been and I didn't want to do it again. So for this year at least, I can consider myself cancer-free. So you know what that means peeps.....if next year's scan is clean(and statistically, I have every reason to believe that it will be), I can have a baby. A fat bellied, bald headed, chubby cheeks baby. Ok but I'm not going to get all excited just yet. I'm just celebrating my very first clean cancer free scan and the fact that I don't have to have to take the scary radiation pill. I love good news. HAHA!

Anyway, moving on, the stress of it all has really sucked out all my creative energy as I'm sure ya'll understand. But Spring, merciful and beautiful Spring is knocking on my door. Actually it's not, really, but I'm so over Winter and so happy it's almost over, I'm already in a Spring/Summer state of mind. I would have bitched and complained last year but this year just feels different. The fact that it's almost over and I can smell it in the air and the birds are singing a little louder gives me an excuse to just pretend that the lingering cold is merely a fluke in my perpetual Summer. And although I can honestly say this was one of the coldest winters I ever spent in my part of Florida, strangely I can also say it was the easiest. Because in between the below freezing at night/scarves and gloves during the day days, there were a few 70-75 degree days that I was able to go look for shark teeth. And you guys already know that is my raison d'etre. Sort of. Winter did not yield me much in the way of teeth to be honest but that's ok. Who gets to do that in December and January? Me, so ya think I'm going to complain? No thanks.

We have renewed our efforts to find a new place. I'm already having nightmares about it because I hate moving. Last night I dreamt that our new place was actually the lair of a serial killing dentist. I won't go into details lest ya'll begin to wonder things about me but just remember this and you'll understand my anxiety: My 12th anniversary is in a couple weeks. And in these 12 years we have moved...pausing to count on fingers.....ok I stopped counting at 14 times. Um, yeah. But I can't take going up and down three flights of stairs all day anymore. I'm sure when this move happens the posts here will get rather interesting.

Oh my star

2009-02-13T09:41:00.010-05:00

I wish I had all kinds of scandalous gossip to report but all I have for ya'll this week are dead things. Enjoy...

Walking on the beach this Monday I found this starfish that appeared to have lost it's arm and was in the process of growing another one before it met it's demise on my shore. Alive, it's color would have been a more purpley-bluish.

Yesterday I nearly stepped on this poor puffer fish. He was not as lucky as me apparently....

I wouldn't be smiling if I were him.

I've always thought these guys were cute, spikes and all so I was kinda sad to run into a dead one. He was bigger than any I'd ever seen before, of course the only ones I've ever seen alive were in salt water fish tanks.

Of course I could not end this post without showing off my finds. However I really don't have much to show off. Low tide is just right but maybe the ocean hasn't been rough enough. Because all I found this week were small teeth and sand tiger shark teeth.

I did find that pretty snail shell. I've mentioned before, I don't usually take those home because once my friend's little daughter took one home and noticed the next day there was a hermit crab living inside. I made sure that one was empty so rest assured ya'll. Yesterday was the first time I was able to wear shorts on the beach without freezing so I'm really not going to mope over how lame my finds this week were. BTW for anyone wondering and didn't see that particular post, we did return that hermit crab back to it's home....

Monday Blah(g)

2009-02-09T11:31:00.005-05:00

Finished. I'm so loving that word right now. My day of starvation turned into 2 days of starvation. That did not go down so well. Friday I woke up prepared to not eat until about 8:30 because my body scan was scheduled at 5:30 and I was supposed to fast. Luckily(or so I thought) they asked me if I'd like to come in earlier so I went in at 3:30 and by that time my hands were shaking because I'm guessing my blood sugar was really low. About 20 minutes into the scan I asked if they thought I would need to come in on Saturday for more images and the tech said probably yes because there doesn't seem to be enough 'action' in my intestines. I said," That's because there's nothing in there ok!" I couldn't imagine not being able to eat for another day but she said I could have a light dinner and to come back at 11 the next day. That night, even though I had been able to eat a little, I was still so effing hungry. I couldn't sleep because I was imagining all the food I wished for. For some reason I was craving a really buttery baked potato or mashed potatoes, I was actually rehearsing in my brain what I would tell MrPea I wanted to eat as soon as I came out of the hospital. I was so bitchy the next morning. I mean, I know that there are starving people out there, I know this. So how is it that I could not manage a few hours without food? But let me tell you, I was in such a bad mood. To be honest, I was not only touchy, I was downright depressed. It's really strange to me now that it's over the kind of mood I was in. I almost went off on the poor receptionist who told me that the nuclear med department just called her and said they wouldnot be ready for me for 30 minutes. I sort of yelled at her and told her everyone in that hospital is crazy and stormed out. After sitting in the car with MrPea for 20 minutes, I felt bad so when I went back in I told her I was sorry for being so mean . But honestly, guys, imagine not having a decent meal in two days. A half hour schedule delay would seem like an eternity, especially since that would mean a half hour delay in your getting your damn potato you've been dreaming about all night. I had even snapped at the tech person the day before because she asked me to move my head so that they could get a side view image. So I moved. She said," Can you turn just a tiny but more?" I said," If I turn my head any further I'd have to be Linda Blair- Exorcist so can you just take the damn images already?" Ouch- feel bad about that too.....

Anyway, it was over quickly and they were nice enough to show me my images, although they couldn't make any official comments on them since I would have to wait for word from my doctor. I'm hoping that will be by the end of this week. I'm tentatively relieved because there didn't look like there was any tissues in my neck area compared to last year's images so I'll be crossing my fingers until I hear from doc. But I've always celebrated too early only to be kicked in the arse later so I'll just say that I'm glad, at least for now, to be FINISHED with all that crap for another year. AND yes I did order a big heaping plate of mashed potatoes with my tall club sandwich for lunch. I was able to catch up with my sleep this weekend so The Pea you heart is back to 100%.

AND the most beautiful thing to be able to say? I'm going to the beach today. Low tide hits just at the right hour. I don't even care that it's cold out. It's sunny and that's all I need right now.

So far so good this week

2009-02-05T09:59:00.003-05:00

This is the week all my medical "stuff" is going down. I had my thyrogen injections on Monday and Tuesday. Both went well without any freakouts or major side effects. I did get head aches but it was probably more due to the lack of sleep I've been getting. Then yesterday morning I went in for my radio-iodine pill. This one has a low amount of radiation for tomorow's full body scan. I sort of have to starve myself tomorow since my appointment is at 5:30. But I made sure that I could use my ipod again this year otherwise I'll just go nuts laying there for three hours. Have you ever noticed you never feel itchy or fidgety until someone tells you not to itch or fidget? The second it starts my nose starts to run or get tickly and my back starts to itch and all I can do is think, mind over matter....mind over matter.....
Hopefully everything will come out clean and cancer free. If so it will be a real first since my surgery two years ago.

I'm too exhausted to be interesting right now. Tell me something funny.....

I promised you some oranges, but have some jelly too.

2009-01-27T16:24:00.011-05:00

Because I'm just so nice like that. Sharing is caring, ya'll know that.

So here is my finished drawing in it's new frame. It's kind of lopsided as you can probably notice because when I was cutting the paper I wanted to use to make a matte frame with, I used the wrong measurements...oh you should have seen the temper tantrum that ensued. But I'm not about to spend the time to make a new one to frame it in so here you go. I'm the only one who needs to be bothered by it anyway since it's new home is in my kitchen. I also never intended to get a green frame but, hey it was $7.99!

And I know you're just dying for some jelly so here you go, peeps. Dead jellyfish seems to be a recurring theme over here so I didn't want to break with the tradition last week when I came upon this one. I thought to myself, where are the tentacles? Does this one not have any? ooh I gotta take a picture for my blog!

A few feet away I found the "Medusa". Enjoy the jelly, my friends. I don't know when the next time will be. Oh ok, I'm sure it won't be that long.

Today was not so sunny. But foggy again in just the scary way I like. I couldn't stay longer than an hour though. It was windy and my sweater wasn't thick enough.

Just think about all the shark teeth there in that orange patch I probably missed out on because I was just too cold to really get a good look.....sigh.

Friday Round Up

2009-01-23T16:06:00.002-05:00

I haven't been feeling well lately. I haven't been sleeping enough that's for sure. I'm sure that's why. But, even so, it's that time of year again. Well actually that time of year has past because for the millionth time, my doctor's office screwed up with my schedule and again my appointments are later than they were supposed to be. I'm not going to get into it because, it will put me in a bad mood so let's just stay on a positive note and I'll tell you guys that I was not a door mat about it this time. I was a squeaky wheel! So be proud of me, peeps. On the first week of February all my routine follow up cancer 'stuff' starts. I have to get these weird thyrogen injections to get me ready for a low dose radioactive iodine pill that will get me ready for a full body scan(sounds pretty sexy don't it?....it's not). The body scan day is a day of starvation again. It'll suck and I'll probably complain a lot so if you need to check out for that week, it won't hurt my feelings. I always do this stuff in the winter because I'm miserable in the winter anyway, so if I'm sick too then for some reason it's easier for me. I'd rather be sick and miserable in the winter than sick and stuck in the house in the spring and summer. Plus it makes the the winter time go faster for some reason because I have a goal. Are you laughing? I thought so. Welcome to my logic!

Last year's scan showed that there was still some bad tissues left over from the first time I had radiation so, as some of you may be loathe to remember(as I am), I ended up having to have radio-iodine treatment in the hospital again so I'm hoping this time will be a clean scan. My doctor says I should wait for two years of clean scans before I try to have a baby so I was hoping this year would count as year one.....But I won't cry this time around. What can I do, you know? Life isn't so bad for me as it is without a mini-me so I shouldn't get all depressed about it. It's not like being sad would speed up the process anyway. There was so much cancer the first time, I wouldn't be surprised if there was any left over. Or scared. Well maybe a little scared but not like before. And again, there's nothing to be afraid of, this is not the kind of cancer that is incurable, it's just a matter of not wanting to turn into a nuclear bomb because they can only give me so much radiation at a time and then wait for the tissues to disappear before checking to see if they got it all. I may be small but I've always been a scrappy little smurf. I'm not saying I don't complain like a pansy the whole time, but the gloves are always off when it comes to this stuff....

So that's that. On a more random note, ya'll, get this. I met a girl named Nefertiti yesterday. She was as beautiful as her name beholds. I said,"wow, is your mom into Egyptian history?" Her: "I don't know, do you know my mom?" I said," Well, because your name, you know." Her:"No, what about my name?" I said," You didn't know that you have the same name of an Egyptian queen? Are you joking with me?" Her,"I am? For real? How do you know this?" I said,"Doesn't everyone?" Her,"No, honestly I don't know what you're talking about, my grandma has the same name, we both call ourselves Neffie." I told her to look it up. She wasn't kidding, she didn't know and got really excited about it. I wasn't sure if I should be pissed off at how bad the schools are or surprised that i was the first one who noticed and said something. How in the world can you go 22 years with a name like that without *A*anyone telling you or *B* not learning that in basic highschool history?

AND! Check out one of my drawings I did with my new colored pencil that my MrPea gave me for Christmas. Not bad for not having used them in 15 years. I have to admit, I sort of cheated and used an art book to help me, but I didn't outline it and it wasn't a colored drawing, I just used the design as a guide. I bought the book to help me reaquaint myself with simple drawing because I've been painting and doing pottery but not so much drawing for so long and I missed the sign up deadline for classes. I took this with my cell phone so it's bad quality photo. Anyway, this is a little cutesy in comparison with what I like to do but it's not bad for a start. It's not finished here, obviously but I'll show you how it looks in it's frame when I get to it.

I've been waiting for this day for 8 long years

2009-01-20T09:41:00.003-05:00

I don't have anything poignant to say, I'm not that kind of writer. Whenever I try, it comes out sounding either corny or negative. And I don't want to be negative on a day thousands of volunteers and I worked so hard to make happen.

But, it's a great day to be American.

(Youtube wouldn't let me post the official video. Everyone has already seen this video anyway)

Small piece of the past

2009-01-15T13:50:00.015-05:00

My Grandfather was an aerial turret gunner in WW2. His plane was shot down by a Japanese fighter plane. He and 2 other men, the pilot and radioman, were MIA for I think 3 months. Their plane was shot down and they crashed at sea but survived. They floated at sea for a couple days and took refuge on Mono Island which is located in the Solomon islands. He had been shot in the leg and the natives helped hide them from the Japanese for all that time before they were able to escape to safety. Of course none of us grandkids knew any of this because he never spoke a word about this to anyone. All we knew was that he had been in a war and walked around with a bullet still in his leg. It was understood that we were not to ask about it for he didn't talk about it. I was only a little kid who's only exposure to the idea of war was on Tom and Jerry so I had no idea what any of that really meant anyway. And as I got older it wasn't something I wondered about because I was your typical narcissistic teen. I think he had been asked to speak at church and that was when he decided to share the story so that all the young people listening to him would understand that there is a higher plan for each of us. Even before any of this came to light, we had always looked up to him as our hero and thought of him as the strongest, biggest, bravest, defender from all bogeymen, Captain of all Heroes. I am not joking or exaggerating. Once, when I was 4 years old, we were spending the summer at my Grandparents' farm and we were playing in the barn. We had been told not to play in there but tell 4 kids on the most beautiful, magical farm in West Virginia where not to go and that's the first place you'll find them. We had only been in there for a few minutes when my oldest sister began screaming at a snake that I still think of as the biggest one in the wild I've ever seen. We ran back to the house and upon seeing my tears, my Papa asked what happened. We told him what we saw and ran to my Grandmother's ever outstretched arms and shut the sliding glass door tightly. A half Popsicle later, my Grandmother told us to look out the window. There was our Papa with that big snake, still alive and wrapped around his shoulders, showing us that we had nothing to fear. That's just one of many examples of why we all thought that he was The Man of Steel. This is a man who survived a plane crash hid on an enemy inhabited island in the Pacific during WW2, hunted down for three months and lived to escape and tell about it(but didn't). Whenever I'm scared, I tell myself,"That's who I am, that's where I'm from." There used to be a website that had all the details but it no longer exists.

One month ago I was doing some research because I was looking for that very website or any other that might mention his experience or anyone who knew him. I came upon a post on Military.com on the missing buddies message board looking for him. It was a woman who had gone to his high school some time after he did and inherited a letter that he wrote to his teacher shortly after their escape and she was hoping to share it with his family. I posted back that the very man she was looking for was my Grandfather and to please email me. About two weeks went by and no word. I got a little discouraged because it was posted in 2007 so I thought I'd never hear from her. Right around Christmas, I got impatient and was able to track down her email through Military.com to a highschool reunion website and sent off another note. This time I got a reply! So since then we have been emailing back and forth. She emailed me a picture but honestly I can't pick out my Grandpa in it, probably because I'm more familiar with his face as an older man. But I was happy to have it. I gave her my address and yesterday I received a large envelope with several copies of the letter for myself and the rest of my family and I can't express how happy I was to receive it! Reading it, I could almost hear my Papa's voice. I wrote her to thank her and told her that the loss of my Grandparents was something I've never quite gotten over and probably never will. But I feel like a small piece of my Grandfather arrived in the mail yesterday so for that I thanked her.

**update** My Aunt is going to send me a copy of his written account. I used to have a copy in my computer a long time ago but that one got a virus and my Papa died before he could email me another. So I'll finally have a written account from him of my own....

Flickr

2009-01-13T09:43:00.002-05:00

Remember my little trip to St. Augustine? I posted my pictures on Flickr if anyone feels like checking them out.....

Oh heaven help me now

2009-01-10T21:11:00.002-05:00

MrPea thought it was a good idea to buy a deep fryer. The home fries were good but good lord this is a dangerous thing for me to have in this house. Because I could eat fried chicken with gravy everyday, 3 times a day until I fall over from cardiovascular disease.....

Confession

2009-01-09T19:17:00.006-05:00

I actually considered buying a scanner specifically so I could show you guys my 8th grade school picture. I used to have a printer that scanned, but after my last radiation-iodine treatment MrPea bought me a photo printer that doesn't scan and got rid of the old one. So I have to get a new one eventually. I just wanted you guys to see me in my big 80s bangs, with turquoise blue eyeliner and frosted pink lipstick. So yeah, that's my confession: I once had mall hair and wore blue eyeliner(even though I wasn't technically allowed to wear makeup.) Do with that info what you want and I can't have one of those cute little retrospective posts all the cool people already did. I guess it doesn't really though because I haven't offered up any proof. Still though, you gotta give a girl credit just for the admission, that was hard for me :O)

BTW I left a message at my doctor's office yesterday because I still haven't heard from them even though I was PROMISED everything would be taken care of at the first of this month. I'm supposed to have thyrogen injections(I hate that word) to get me ready for a small dose of radio-iodine(radioactive but not as radioactive as the actual radiation treatment) so that I can have a body scan. And this all has to be specifically timed one day after the other for four days so that everything comes out as accurate as possible. Because if they see any cancer tissue left over then I have to go off my med again and have radiation. I told my doctor at my last appointment that I would be happiest if we did ASAP so that I can get it over with quickly and that by Spring which for me is March, I will be feeling up and at 'em again. Because if I just let it go and not say anything, I'll be waiting until Feb and even then they'll call me the day before to tell me I start my appointment the next day. Even though I TOLD them and TOLD them and even made them write it on my chart that my husband and I share our car, he works 30 minutes away so they need to let me know in advance so that we can plan and he always wants to come with me. I'm not very happy because she reassured me that things would move quickly for me and more efficiently since I was so angry about their incompetent scheduling procedures last year. I don't expect special treatment I just expect human treatment and for people to do what they say they are going to do. You can guess whether or not they called me back or not right? I'm going to go down there Monday morning, politely of course. But at least they'll know I mean business.....That's what I mean guys, that's the kind of stuff you have to do when you are a patient and at some time or other we all are. I used to be so mousy and in so many ways I still am. But when it comes to my health and well being I really don't give a flying, er, cookie, if people like me or not anymore. That's probably the only positive that came out of having cancer but I'll take it.

On Joining New Clubs

2009-01-08T10:26:00.009-05:00

Last night I went to a local political club meeting that I joined back when I first started volunteering for the Obama campaign. I only know a couple people because most of the people who I volunteered with weren't really members but were mainly hanging around because we all had a common goal. Now that the election is over, everyone's back to regular routine and I don't imagine I'll see any of those volunteers until next election. (I've already made a commitment to help out with the next Governor race so I hope I can get a few of them on the trail with me) I didn't go to our last meeting which was actually a Christmas Party because at the time I wasn't feeling well. So I imagine the couple people I did actually know didn't expect to see me back. I figured this out when everyone commented on my youth. I'm not a freshly hatched chickadee, I turned 32 last July but these people acted like I was some kind of toddler. I suppose they were shocked because I am the only routine member under 60 minus a handful of 40 and 50somethings. Their delight at a younger face makes me a little sad because it tells me that my peers didn't really get the message. We are on the eve of a huge celebration this January 20th. But when the confetti is swept away, were we all just expecting some kind of magic wand? Poof, the economy is fixed. Zap, everything's wonderful again. Obviously I'm not delusional or expecting any miracles but what happened to the euphoria and the yes we did and let's change this country, we were all feeling on November 5? Everyone said, oh I feel changed, I'm going to do more! Where the hell were they last night? I don't even want to hear busy, most of these people were independently wealthy enough to avoid the financial crisis going on and like me, have the freedom of time. I see their pictures in our local newspaper in the society sections. I guess this isn't glamorous enough..... Last year when I went to get a new driver liscence and reregister to vote, the man standing behind called me a Lexus Liberal. Well, his exact words were, "Yer, one-a-them Lexus Librulls, aintchuh?" I was dumbfounded and said,"I don't know what that is, I've never owned a Lexus." (I can't afford an effing Lexus!) He laughed at me. He was a jerk anyway but I never understood what he meant. I do now.

I think I was feeling down because the speakers who came to talk to us were from local homeless shelters, food banks and emergency residence aid workers. Listening to them speak, I thought about how the people who utilise these places are not nameless faceless people. One of my neighbors told me that recently, she lost her job as a nurse(A NURSE-I thought there was nationwide shortage of nurses?) and that if not for the local food bank, she and her husband, who works at a GROCERY STORE of all places, wouldn't have known what to do or where to go. And the thought of my own sister, who is recently divorced thousands of miles from any family, with three young children, now works 2 jobs and is having a difficult time making ends meet brings it even closer to home. Out of sight, out of mind no more.

I mentioned how disappointed I was at not seeing anyone from our campaign volunteer group to the only former canvassing partner of mine who showed. She said something to me that I'd heard before but this time it didn't sound like an "Oprah-ism." She said not to dwell on who's not here or what other people aren't doing. I should focus on what I would do, what we could do together. Even if it were the smallest of things, we can't save the world, that's impossible but we can find one thing we care about and do what we can. For some reason the one thing that struck me the most was the speaker from the food bank telling us that if we'd like to donate children's clothing not forget to buy underwear because they are really short on underwear. I said to myself, I gotta do something about that. We both made plans to get together and try to get a list of people we could call who wanted to chip in with us to buy some damn underwear at least twice a year. I didn't grow up anywhere near privilege, my dad was in the military. But my gosh we had underwear. I mean, I'm joking about it now but that really really bothered me.

On a lighter(spiritual) note I was pleasantly surprised to learn that the church I recently started attending after years of refusing to step foot in any church(minus once for my nephew's baptism), was deeply involved in the food bank and free clinic I was thinking about volunteering for. They are both only a couple miles away. I've been sort of contemplating whether or not I wanted to become permanent member because I have a lot of unpleasant personal feelings towards church and organised religion that I don't like talking about. (I grew up in a RELIGIOUS home and have always been spiritual but not religious anymore.) That sort of sealed it for me though. If I was slightly leaning towards this church before last night, I'm definitely leaning heavily now. We'll see....

Joy to the world!

2009-01-06T10:05:00.004-05:00

I know-I know ya'll. Christmas is over. But that's what I feel like every time I put my new favorite shoes on! I even wore them to church yesterday.(yes I occasionally go to church internets...)They don't look very churchy but ask me if I care. And yes they are hard to walk in but I do fine in high heels anyway. I've been wearing them since I was 4and got caught walking around in my mom's shoes. Officially though she started letting me wear heels when I was in the fifth grade. It was probably a mistake. We had a talent show at school and my friend Ann and I were dancing in it. Because the size of the cafeteria was not large enough to accommodate the whole school, there were 3 shows. The first and second show went off without a hitch. The third show however, is filed in the mortification section of my brain. So there I was in my silver miniskirt that my mom had sewn for me. It was actually a leftover part of my Halloween Costume that I was recycling as my talent show costume since the song we were dancing to had sort of a space-like sound, as so many really bad 80s pop songs did. My little partner had borrowed my sister's exact match silver mini so we were thinking we looked so damn cute. I had on some suede pale grey kitten heel pumps lined with rhinestones that I swore I saw Madonna wearing. By the middle of the song, everything was going great. I look over at Ann and she nods at me because we are ready to do our jumps in unison. First jump I heard a rip. No it was not me, it was Ann. She ripped the silver mini! Not enough to really get embarrassed over but 5th grade girls get embarrassed easily. She had a frozen look on her face and I realized she's about to bail so I felt like I had to save the day. I did my jump by myself and to my horror, my shoe flies off my right foot. Suddenly Ann starts laughing really hard(when she's supposed to be dancing not laughing at me!!) and sort of pretends to move towards me so that I can pretend I need to move towards her but really it's because I need to dance to where my shoe landed so I can put it back on. No one laughed at us, it's likely they thought it was part of the show but I was mortified.....

These shoes definitely make up for any embarrassing moment I ever had. And by the way don't make fun of my second toe, I'm sensitive about it. Really. And don't start with me animal people-it's faux snake skin ok. I don't have a problem wearing the skins of animals that I eat but I don't eat snakes so I won't wear them.

And since I'm on the topic of Christmas gifts I thought I would share with ya'll the fruit of another gift from MrPea. I had to take it with my cell cam because I'm still having a problem uploading with my regular cam. It's been a long time since I've used colored pencils, 14 years to be exact, so I'm pretty much learning from scratch all over again. I used a book to help me with this one. I'm still painting here and there but not as much as before because my easel is in storage until we move and my desk is too small.....at least with colored pencils, the supplies are more portable and I can work anywhere.

I'm finally over my nasty Christmas cold and was able to go the beach yesterday. I really shouldn't be out there in that cold, wet ,sea air but I can't help it. My find was nothing to brag about so I didn't even bother to take a picture. I did see what I'm pretty sure were Right Whales. This would be the time of year for them show up. I know I didn't mistake them for dolphins because there were dolphins too. The Right Whales were further off shore than the dolphins. I could see black tail fins and V-shaped blows. It was the first time I ever saw whales before so I was really happy. The dolphins were grey and playing really close to the shore, I'm guessing because the water was calm and it's too cold for anyone to swim so they had the water all to themselves. Who the hell needs Sea World?(Sea World still makes me cry anyway)

SickPea

2008-12-27T15:53:00.003-05:00

I have a nasty cold. It all started Christmas Day with a that really horrible sore throat. I'm at the nasal congestion and fatigue part. I would probably be feeling a lot better today if not for the really loud music some people in my building thought the rest of us wanted to listen to until 4:00 in the morning. So I had maybe 3 hours of sleep last night. I just woke up from a two hour nap so I'm feeling much better than I was this morning. I'm tired though. I still can't upload pictures but I wanted to share with you what MrPea got me for Christmas. Best gifts ever!

Peace be with Thee Internets

2008-12-24T23:16:00.003-05:00

I had a cute picture for you my peeps but our computer has been hijacked by something really funky and my camera cannot upload. I couldn't let the day pass without wishing the Happiest of Holidays to everyone in the Blogosphere. To those who don't celebrate, have a beautiful and relaxing day.

Peace, Love, Happiness!

Hell on Earth is a shopping center in December

2008-12-22T19:11:00.012-05:00

MrPea and I don't usually do gifts because we shop together often. Plus, he is the sort of guy who, if he wants it, he bought it already so that makes it so difficult to shop for him. This year we decided to do gifts. I am the sort of person who is usually finished Christmas shopping before December even rolls in but this year, economics forced me to wait until this week. I can't tell you where I went because MrPea likes ruining surprises for himself. I can't even tell you about the miracle wrapping techniques I had to use so that he wouldn't be able to shake, inspect, put his ear next to and figure out what. Yes, I had to sabotage for the sake of Christmas.

Oh. How the hell can anyone even think of shopping this time of year? There are some people out there who love all this. I am not one of them. I usually do not step foot in any retail store from mid November until February.

I actually stood in line behind someone who I just SAW park a $70,000.00 vehicle argue with a poor, tired looking cashier over 48cents. According to his calculation, his amount due should have been 48cents less than the cash register's figure. Honestly, I wanted to reach into my pocket and just give him the 48cents he was bitching about. I totally get it that economic times are tough-- MrPea and I have been cutting back on just about everything and I've been on pins and nails every time his company announces job cuts. OK I'm there. But this guy wasn't using a,"I'm sorry, I think there must have been a mistake," kind of tone. It was more of a,"You f-ing stupid ass people need to correct this extra 48cents otherwise I'll enjoy ruining everyone else's shopping experience...." outburst. The worst thing about it was, he was with his kid, who will likely grow up to be just as rude and entitled as his father. Happy Holidays....

The cashier kindly told him he'll have to take it up with customer service and I swear she is my new hero because there was a HUGE line at customer service. Just as someone who used to work in retail, and suffered through a Holiday season, I always cringe when I hear people say,"The customer is always right." No, my dear, the customer is not always right. Sometimes the customer is an assh@##. I didn't bother to see if he took it up with customer service but I did giggle with the cashier over it. Poor girl, I bet he wasn't even the worst of them. You know who 'they' are. You've probably been encountering 'them' just as much as I have.

What the hell happens to us at Christmas? Are we a bunch of vultures? Just a social critique but the only good thing that I hope will come out of our collective belt tightening this season is that maybe people will realize how ridiculously overboard they have been going as far as gift buying. Look, I'm no Scrooge, I LOVE buying gifts for my nephews but I still don't get why people spend thousands+ of dollars on their kids, tell them some strange man drops down the chimney to give them all these things for free and then wonder why their kids start acting all entitled and materialistic when they are too old to believe in Santa Claus. Don't jump down my throat, people with kids, I know-I know, I don't have any so I can't really say anything. But I'd rather raise my hypothetical kids to believe that 'mommy and daddy work really hard so I should be thankful for these wonderful gifts they bought me' than the above method. Mind you, this does not mean I would ruin Santa Claus for them. Of course Santa will come down our chimney, just not with 1000s of dollars worth of free stuff for being "good". I'm not delusional, I have 6 nephews ok? There's no such thing as a kid who's '$3000.00 at Toys-R-Us' good. I used to work for a Child Care Center in a neighborhood who will not be feeling the economic pain the rest of us are, and I can tell you right now, every single one of those children had some kind of behavioral problem. Because their parents were either the "I want to be my kid's best friend" types or the "buy everything the kid wants so he'll shut up" type. Or "they are being raised by their nannies and spend about 5 minutes per day with their kids so they use money to alleviate their guilt" type. And once in a while I'd run into the "I'm an unapologetic jerk and I want my kid to grow up to be just like me" type, like I did today.

Oh I'm in a bad mood today aren't I? Am I picking on kids? I can't be, I love children. I wish I had 10 of them I do. No, I'm picking on parents.

Well after all my lecturing about wasteful spending, my sister sent me this:

And it sounded like a reasonable request.

I finished only 5 dollars over budget for MrPea and have one more gift to get at Tar-jay. Oh help me if I have to spend more than 5 minutes in another store until all this is over.....

More More More

2008-12-21T08:57:00.003-05:00

That's it for a little while though. I need a break. My eyes need a rest. At least I have something to post as I am still blahgged out lately.

These are nothing to get excited about but I thought they looked interesting. A nice patterned piece of crab shell, a broken whelk and the one on the bottom is very common-I forgot the name. But it looks pretty hanging in the sun so it was the only one I kept.

More teeth.

The find of the day was this reddish one. Second time I found a red tooth.

A stingray barb and really worn down tiger shark tooth.

I did make friends with an old guy who found a blue starfish but I was too shy to ask if I could take a picture. I also met some people from out of town who asked for some tips. Normally I don't give out tips to tourists as I am stingy and want all the shark teeth for myself. I usually just say smile and play stupid and say," I don't really understand how to find them myself, I just stare at the ground until I see one." But they were Floridians and I was feeling generous. It is Christmas after all.... they even came up to me later all triumphant with a small bull shark tooth and gave it to me.

Do not adjust your screen,just another day in the fog

2008-12-17T20:22:00.012-05:00

It really was that foggy. Scary Scoobie Doo episode foggy. Edgar Allen Poe foggy. You know what I mean. Ooh and it was fun.

My find was nothing to brag about....

But I did have fun scaring myself as the fog got worse and worse. I sat on a dead palmetto eating chocolate covered graham crackers and pretended this man in dark clothes was a Psychoman coming to get me. Passing by, he looked at me funny, um, I don't know probably because I was giggling like a campfire kid listening to a scary story at a girl scout trip.

Most sane people would have packed up and went home because after about an hour you could barely see at all unless you were crouching on the ground to take pictures, er, which was what I was doing.

I always think to myself, it's a good thing only a handful of people come to this beach because I'm pretty sure I must look like a complete fool to anyone who happens to see a girl laughing by herself and skipping around in the foam.
At the same time do I care whether anyone sees me walking around in foam? No. And why should I? Everyone should, at least once walk around in algae foam grossing themselves out in the fog. Just cuz they're wearing flip flops and they can.

The fog was so bad that any hair sticking out of my hood was dripping wet and my nose was running.

At last look before I dragged myself back to my bike to go home, I could hardly see the ocean anymore.

Call me crazy, but there's just something magical about a scary fog.

Not bad at all

2008-12-15T19:03:00.005-05:00

The ocean's been kind of rough lately. I couldn't get out the the beach until today when low tide is too late in the day for me to really find the good stuff. Today's find was not as I had hoped but here's the thing: It's December and I'm on the beach wearing flipflops, do you think I'm going to even think about complaining? And anyway, as you can see, I did ok for a mid-tide , foamy trek.

The best ones were these, that bigger one being a Great White. I did end up finding a small handful more than this after my apple juice break (when I took these pictures) but I was too lazy to take more pix and anyway, ya'll get the point.

These tiny ones are kind of interesting because they have a redddish color to them that my camera didn't capture well but take my word for it. When I saw them wet on the sand, they were a red-orangey color.

It had been thick-foggy all day and just before I left at 4, the sun came out for a peak and this shrimp boat sort of appeared out of no where. I thought, if I squint my eyes, it could pass for a pirate ship but alas, Johnny Depp did not show up. Oh well.

Peanut is still king of the snow

2008-12-12T14:48:00.003-05:00

Even though it doesn't snow here. Yesterday was Peanut's 11th birthday so I wanted to post this picture of him in Canada. As I've said before, we got him on Valentine's Day at a pig farm in Slidell, Louisiana. I almost didn't take him home because when I picked him up he was so wiggly and noncompliant unlike his wiry haired sister, who, I was 5 seconds away from putting in my backpack and running off with after we had already paid for our new disobedient, new shoe eating puppy. He sort of chose MrPea, even though today he has an "I love you/I'm ignoring you unless you have food or something I need," attitude towards the both of us(but especially MrPea). He doesn't listen. He'll run out the door if you leave it open. He steals unattended food. He likes destroying crumpled up paper. He enjoys dismembering and disemboweling his toys. He likes to hunt lizards in a creepy, stalkerish manner. He also begs shamelessly and sticks his face in everyone's food. But still, we'll keep him around a little while. He's our old man of the house.....

I have nothing interesting to post as nothing interesting has happened lately. Well, no, there are a couple noninteresting but noteworthy things I can tell you peeps.

-Two days ago I was wearing a short skirt and teeshirt. This morning our temperature was 43. How the hell is that possible?

-Last week MrPea talked me into buying some really highheeled snakeskin(faux,mind you) peep toe shoes. I'm loathe to admit that I loveth them. But my goal was to find warm shoes. I did not accomplish this goal because I hated everything else in that store that looked remotely warmish. And there they were beckoning me. But I've decided to return them. I already feel jealous of whoever's going to buy them. I feel like I need to take a picture of them before I bring them back. Is that sick or what?

Sorry that's all I have for you guys as I'm all blahhged out. Give me something to blog about peeps. Ask me something, I'll tell you. As it is, life is blissfully quiet right now and I find myself in hibernation mode with the drop in temperature. No shark teeth either, the wind is damp and cold. Maybe next week.

Feedback Please!!

2008-12-09T17:49:00.002-05:00

I'm not so sure I'm crazy about the new look over here but I needed a change. Please give me some feedback guys and let me know if it shows up well or if I should lose all these colors and get with a more simple palette. Even if I don't hear from any of you peeps, I might just change it all up anyway. I am keeping my header no matter what. I'm just not so sure about keeping a template that forces me to have the same color for my header and post font.

Tuesday Confession

2008-12-09T10:24:00.005-05:00

I have been eating chocolate covered popcorn nonstop for 5 days now. Yesterday I ran an extra half mile just so I could eat a bigger chunk of chocolate covered popcorn when I got home. I hate sweets but I do this every winter with the chocolate. Why?

Last week I had a Doctor appointment. I got bullied into agreeing to having a body scan this January. Well I wasn't really bullied, she just told me that this would be a yearly thing until every body scan in a row for 3 years showed up clean. This means I could possibly have another radioiodine situation which depresses me just thinking about because of how badly it was all coordinated last year. I talked with her about how angry I still was about all the scheduling problems, the no return my phone calls, the letting me know about my appointment the day before, making appointments without asking me first, me being off my meds for 6 weeks instead of the 2 that I was promised which resulted in my being extremely and unnecessarily ill and sore for a month and a half, etc etc. She said she'll give me her cell phone number so that if this happens I can reach her directly but I have a feeling it will all be the same story. Everyone gets treated this way by their healthcare providers when we have a for-profit-system so I don't see why I would get any better treatment just because I'm bitching about it now. Plus even she knows it's a possibility otherwise, why would she try to make me feel better by giving me her number. I have a feeling it won't come to that though. I mean, I've had radiation twice. Most people with my problem only need it once. I'm preparing for the worst though because my tumor was the size of a friggin banana. That way I won't be disappointed if they still find some left over cancer cells. I told her I wanted to get it all done ASAP so I could get it over with. She said January, which I'm wondering if it really means February since that's when it all went down last time. If you were around back then, you'll remember I snuck in an old phone so I could post. What I didn't post was that they were working on the fire alarm system and it was going off every hour from 11pm until 6am. The food was puke on a plate and my view was a brick roof. I took so many showers and drank so much damn water, forcing myself to pee as much as I could(that brings your radioactive level to safer levels so you can go home), that's why I got out of there in 24 hours. I'm doing it in a different hospital this time. I wish you guys could have seen my room when I left. They tape paper on the floor and everything in the room except the bed and in the bathroom they use latex to cover anything that might be touched except for the shower. The water facets look like they are giving you the bird because they used latex gloves. It was a primary election day so I decided to write Barack! all over everything in the room. Every nurse that came in said," bay- rack? what's that honey?" At around 2am when I gave up on getting any sleep because the effing alarms were going off, I started writing stupid stuff like,"Help me help me. They told me I was a mental patient...I just thought I was Elvis...they are keeping me against my will. Can I have some Cheerios please?"Anyway, at least I'll be left alone until after Christmas....

BTW Did anyone watch Charlie Brown last night?

(I hate)Shopping for winter clothes

2008-12-04T10:31:00.004-05:00

I've been busy lately. Instead of posting like a good blogstress, I have been at the mall looking for warm clothes to wear until Spring. I loathe winter clothes. I've already told ya'll this. I hate long sleeves, they make me feel like I'm in jail. I hate tights, they itch. I hate hats, I'm vain about my hair. I hate gloves, they make my hands sweat. I hate scarves, it feels like a noose. I hate jackets, they are heavy and once you get to your destination you have to drag it around all over the damn place. And most of all I hate pants. Yes, even jeans, the staple must have in every person's wardrobe. But the biggest of my many reasons I hate shopping for jeans/pants can be seen here:

Looks like a nice little outfit right? Navy cardigan, nice fitting jeans.....

Until you scroll down. I'm not a big fan of paying for new jeans and then having to pay even more to get them tailored.

I did end up getting the cardigan but not the jeans. I hate cardigans too but, like I said, I'm not going through another winter feeling like slouchy smurf. I heard about another store nearby that does free alterations. I'll probably go there this weekend.

I'm still looking for the shoes. I might get these for walking just cuz' I'm beginning to feel like a girl Jerry Sienfeld in my old Nikes. I'm just not crazy about the price so let me know if you guys see anything similar for less. I'm also still looking for some boots that don't make my legs look like two stumps.....

Birds and dead things from yesterday's beach trip

2008-11-26T11:36:00.010-05:00

Don't be crabby about the winter.......

This Horseshoe Crab is dead by the way.(He's probably crabby about the winter)I was a little scared of him because he was pretty big until I realized he wasn't alive. Not that there's any reason to fear these guys, I've already told you all, I'm afraid of everything.

This dead thing, I'm not quite sure what it is. I tried to put it back in the water just in case it was still alive but stuck. But no, dead too. I'll have to look it up in my field guide to figure out what to call it so until then, we'll just call it the squishy dead thing.

There were a lot of birds. This probably looks like parent birds with their chicks but they are actually 2 different species. Both of which I don't know the names because I'm too lazy to look for my field guide but they are pretty common shore birds.

Sing along with me, Bob Marley lovers: Rise up this morning....smile with the rising sun...three little birds...each by my doorstep....singing sweet songs... of melodies pure and true...sayin', "this is my message to you--oo--oo.....Don't worry...about a thing...cuz every little thing.....'s gonna be alright..."

Pelicans always amaze me when they fly so close to the water like this.

This was actually taken by accident while I was adjusting my camera but I liked it. I can't wait to get a better camera so I can start taking some better pictures.

Notice my shadow appears to be wearing jeans and a thick sweater so don't get too jealous, those of you who live in winter wonderland---it wasn't that warm. (But then again, it wasn't that cold either so, ok, go ahead and get jealous if you want to)

I could not end this post without showing of my modest find. I didn't find the pocketfulls I usually do in the summer but I was happy with the few I did. That hooked shaped one in the middle is from a baby Tiger Shark and I'm always excited to find one of those since I've only ever found a few. And the one in the crowd that's shaped like a perfect triangle is from a Great White, I think. I always pick up white or pink scallop shells to glue to picture frames. Scallop picture frames make good gifts.....Martha's not the only one who knows how to make stuff.

Tuesday Confession

2008-11-25T12:34:00.008-05:00

Two weeks on a row! So remember, I told you guys about my difficulty in letting go of my little "injustice" grudges ? Well I have some more. One of which I'll share with you for today's cleansing of my sins.

-I'm still irritated with my 6th grade teacher for giving me a B for my Science Project instead of an A. Mind you I was 11 years old. I made an Electromagnet machine and my experiment was to find out what kind of materials would make the best electromagnets. I even made a compass with a needle and some cork as an extra little side experiment. I made about 3 or 4 little electromagnets using a large nail, various wires, electric tape and these little mini-jumper cable looking thingies(ok it was over 20 years ago so you can't expect me to remember the exact names for everything so just use your imagination.) My hypothesis was that the tiniest wire would create the most energy and make the strongest magnet and pick up the heaviest pieces of metal when hooked up to the machine. My experiment was damn success because I proved my hypothesis and was able to recreate my experiment for my class when we did our presentations. So I should have received an A not a B. You know what my jerk of a teacher said was the reason he knocked my grade down? BECAUSE THE BOX I USED FOR THE ELECTROMAGNET MACHINE WAS AN OLD BROWN TACKLE BOX. He said if I had used something more "pleasing to the eye" my grade would have been a perfect score. Can you tell how pissed off I still am about this? Especially now that I am older because I feel like going back in time to scream at that jerk teacher of mine,"I'm f-ing 11 ok? I made a damn Electromagnet and you give me a B, but you give the idiot who made a stupid person proof hurricane machine with a MOUNTAIN DEW BOTTLE an A!" Jerk. (not to offend anyone who made any hurricane machines, I was just pointing out that it was a Mountain Dew bottle with the wrapper still on. Even though I do think my creation was superior to a hurricane machine....) I don't even know any 11 year olds who actually know what an electromagnet is. Sorry I could only use what was available to me and by the way, isn't that usually how great discoveries get made? I guess I just didn't have access to thousands of dollars like the rest of average 6th graders in the free world do. I'm sure if I had known how to boil ore and cast my own beautiful metal "pleasing to the eye" box I would have received an A and gone on to MIT to become the greatest scientist on the face of the planet. But no. I'm using my 11 year old resentment to entertain the blogosphere instead. Enjoy at my expense internets.

-So I've just realised that's not really a confession. It's a rant. Well I can't help it. I'm still mad about it. Breathe-breathe. Ok I'm ready to confess something else: I once dyed my hair blond ya'll. A few years ago when I was living in Hawaii, I had just gotten over a really bad all over skin allergy and was feeling quite depressed and vulnerable about my looks. I made an appointment for a cut and high light. The stylist suggested an all over make over and I was such a depressed little mouse I said yes. No it did not make me feel better. It looked horrible and I realised, I don't like blond hair on me. But I spent so much money to get it done, I felt like I had to get my money's worth so I kept it for 2 months until the roots got so bad I had no choice but to dye it back to my natural beloved brunette. I told myself it would be a social experiment. Here's two things I noticed about being blond: Men look at you in a dirtier way when you're blond and are obvious about their dirty thoughts. Like you should just put up with it or something. And 2, if you're not a natural blonde you have to wear a lot of makeup if you don't want to look tired and worn out all the time.

And since we're on the topic I really disdain so called "blond jokes." It gives a certain kind of gal an excuse to pretend to be dumb when they are so clearly not. I really disdain women(and men) who do that. Dumb and cute have never been on the same plane in my book. My Grandma once gave me some really good advice: Never pretend to be dumber than you are just to attract a man. The only kind of man you'll atrract by playing dumb is a dumb man.

Help me internets with my superficial(yet important) stuff

2008-11-24T13:15:00.008-05:00

-I've been invited to a party given by leaders of the club I joined when I started volunteering for the Democratic Party in my town. The invite says they'll have all the Holiday main dishes and cocktails but to bring a side dish or appetizer. Everything I make is too 'involved' and takes forever. If I have to make a fussy dish, I'll end up not going and these people are my new friends so I want to go. What could I bring that doesn't take too long to make or that I could buy that won't get wasted? I hate cooking otherwise I wouldn't care.

-Um. Yeah. The whole winter clothes shortage is still a problem. Besides my jogging shoes, there's not one pair of shoes in my closet that cover my toes. Every year I tell myself, "This year I'll buy a couple cute outfits that are warm." And every year I end up dressing like Slouchy Smurf. Old raggedy jeans, raggedy tee shirt, old ugly ratty jacket and canvass shoes with my piglet socks. Well guess what. Even that uniform is no longer. The canvass shoes have been thrown out the piglet socks had a hole and I can't look at one more raggedy tee shirt if I want to hold on to my sanity. Ok I still have the jeans-one can never go wrong with jeans I know this. I even have one outfit I could wear and not be embarrassed to be seen in but I don't have the shoes. I can't exactly wear a pretty wool skirt, tights and cashmere sweater with my Asics running shoes. I'm sure I have something strappy and cute I could put on my feet but I'm so sensitive to the cold now. I can't be wearing high heeled strappy sandals when it 40 degrees outside. I would love a cute pair of suede boots but dammit when you're 4'11", boots just look so weird. Like you're a little kid playing dress up in a tall girl's shoes. So, if you guys see anything......I should mention I hate pointy toed shoes, and platform stripper shoes. Oh and I need a new jacket too. So if you see one, send me a link. (I hate the puffy, down blanket looking ones. Love corduroy) I wouldn't be asking for help if I didn't live on Florida you guys. There's no winter clothes here. MrPea is no help either because when I complain to him and ask for his help, he just laughs at me and asks me why I even want to bother when we'll only be cold for a few weeks anyway. Well I refuse to spend another couple months feeling like I shop at the Hobo The Clown store. That's why.

-Should I dye my hair? I usually do in the winter because my hair gets so much sun in the summers. The natural highlights the sun creates looks good in the summer but in the winter when my hair grows out it's natural dark brown, my ends start to look brassy and orangey. I just hate having to pay 90 bucks for something I could do myself for 10. Ok actually I just answered my own question. But the other 2.

Tuesday Confession

2008-11-18T17:23:00.002-05:00

I hardly ever do this. But it's only because I'm perfect so I have nothing to confess. You guys know this. Right?

Well I have only a couple really boring confessions to make. But, you know it's Tuesday and that's what Tuesday is for.

1. Today I made broccoli, yellow squash and zucchini for my lunch. Er, I should say I burnt broccoli, yellow squash and zucchini for my lunch. Anyone who's ever burnt this trio of veggies or at least broccoli already knows the wonderful aroma that never goes away. Not even after hours of burning a pumpkin spice candle from World Market. Nope, still stanks(the better, more pungent version of the word stinks. Feel free to steal it and add to your own vocabulary. You're welcome). So now my house smells like garbage soup. And pumpkin spice. Great.

2. Sometimes, when I'm too lazy to dig out and lace up my own sneakers, I use MrPea's to take Peanut downstairs to pee hoping no one will happen to walk by and see me. His feet are twice the size of mine so it's easier to just step into them and head out to door for a few seconds. Guess who was seen in really big shoes and laughed at by some of my neighbor's grandkids? Yep.

Monday Meme

2008-11-17T13:01:00.003-05:00

I got this from a blog I delightfully found by accident. Thank you Curious Cat for giving me something to blog on a Monday......

1) What book has most touched your soul?

-I read so dern much I can't really say this book or that book touches my soul. I was lucky enough to have had teachers in elementary school who read to us a lot and I'm sure that's what sparked my love of reading. When I was in the 3rd grade my family moved and I was in a new school. The county happened to be having some kind of book reading contest and our teacher was reading a Ramona book to the class at the end of each day that we were "good." I participated in the book contest and enjoyed listening to my teacher read to us and that was when I started reading books on my own. My dad even took me to get my own library card and I remember being really happy about it. So that's the best answer I can come up with.

2) How do you think being a teenager today is different from when you were a teenager?

-In some ways it's easier and some ways harder. Easier because today they have a lot more access to information. Harder because, well, they have a lot more access to information. But I'm going to say it's about the same only like I said, they have internet, ipods, and gas is more expensive.

3) If you found out for sure there was no afterlife at all, would you change how you live your life?

-I would probably get really depressed. If all this beauty and ugly were for nothing is a question I ask myself often. No afterlife, the thought makes me very sad and frankly scared. I am not one of those people who don't fear the thought of completely disappearing, losing all thought and existence. What would the point in living be then? I can't really say I would change the way I live my life but I would live it with a fear and sadness without hope that I can't fathom. So I don't really know how to answer this question.

4) What is the biggest regret of your life so far?

-That's easy. I never finished college and I don't have any children. Well the children thing is not as big a regret because I can still have one given me being healthy enough to carry one and if not, there are other ways of becoming a mother. But the school thing. Yeah, what a waste really. But even then, this is also something I could change eventually.

5) Show and Tell. What comes to mind first when you see this picture? Or, tell a story if it reminds you of one.
Oh moose. No it does not make me think of Sarah Palin.....nor any of the pictures I saw of her smiling over the dead body of a big beautiful moose. Honestly it doesn't. (Plus I eat meat, so I have no place to judge. It's just for some reason I have a soft spot for moose. )

I think of Canada. When I was in Canada(for that COLD LONG NEVERENDING WINTER), I wanted very badly to see a moose. My in laws offered to drive me to the zoo to see one. But I said it didn't count. I have to see one in the wild. I walked my dog all over the place hoping to see a moose. Never saw one. I did see a bunny though. Maybe next time.

Feel free to tag yourself, anyone. These things are always useful for those of us who get blogger's block.

When did Autumn get here without warning me? And why?

2008-11-16T17:14:00.002-05:00

Yesterday I was wearing a miniskirt. Today, I'm miserable in jeans and a sweater. Sigh.....

My efforts to look for shark teeth have been thwarted twice over. Well I did find a few but none to really brag about. For one, rough seas left a layer of sand covering the usual patches of shells where I like to look and with the 69 degree water there's no chance of me wading. And now it's just too damn windy cold and will remain cold for at least a couple weeks or until Spring if Old Man Winter is grouchy this year. Damn this weather. Damn. Damn.

I know, I know, I'm the winter grinch. While all you sweater and mitten lovers are getting all excited and digging out your beloved long johns, I'm getting ready for my two to three month long grump fest. But again, I have to say I'm not going to complain too much because, well, hello, I live in Florida! So I have come up with a few things to cheer myself up with.

1. I just went to the beach 2 days ago. Wearing shorts.

2. Friday night at 7:55, MrPea and I ran out to our balcony to watch the sky for the space shuttle launch. This was the 6th one I've been able to watch right from my home. Mind you, during the day all you can really see is smoke and a burst of bright orange. But the night launches. Oh my the night launches, ya'll! Flashes of green surrounded by a bright halo and you can usually hear applause and cheers from anyone else who happened to have come out to watch our space shuttle fly into space. There's nothing like it and I saw it right from my own patio. Said a prayer for our astronauts.

3. I'm still on the decaf. Ok I strayed a little a couple weeks ago because I really needed the energy for canvassing BUT that was it. No caffiene for me.

4. My jeans still fit me.

5. Colder weather means I need new shoes. Which gives me just the excuse I need to go shoe shopping.

That's all I could come up with today. Hopefully I can come up with a few more by Thanksgiving. Have any good news? Leave me some.....

Happy Veterans Day

2008-11-11T08:46:00.002-05:00

Hope everyone's having a good week.

We did it!

2008-11-05T12:56:00.015-05:00

We turned Florida blue! We elected "that one!"

America's new first family.

I'm so proud to have been a part of it all. To have been part of such a positive and inclusive campaign for change!

Barrack Obama is our nation's first Biracial President. And as someone who is also biracial, I have felt a personal connection and drive to elect someone, not who I want to have a beer with, or who's "like me", but someone first and foremost qualified AND knows what it's like to be me. Someone who looks out not just for their own, but will look out for all of us. It is my belief and hope that we have elected(no pun intended again) that one. In my conversations with fellow children who are products of mixed marriages, the topic that comes up so often is our sometimes feeling of invisibility. We can either be one or the other ethnicity, not both. I have always felt like an American and have always loved my country with the devotion of a veteran's daughter who pretty much grew up on a military base. But always within a culture that tells you to check the box, are you white or Asian? You can't be both. I always felt like I was never enough of one or the other for either culture. I sometimes describe myself as a chameleon,fitting in everywhere and no where, but doing my best to create my own identity while at the same time embracing and celebrating both parts of myself. And identity is something that many biracial kids in my generation still struggle with. I could never be white enough to be considered white or Asian enough to be considered Asian; living in a "check the box" culture. We begin to feel invisible sometimes because up until maybe a few years ago, there was no "box" for people like us. I've heard the word Hapa, used to describe people like me with mixed Asian backgrounds, someone even wrote a book featuring us a few years back. I picked up that book and saw my face on every page. In 2004 I watched a self described,"skinny kid with a funny name," speak to America and something in my heart burst. I was not only, no longer invisible, but I was now a "skinny kid with a funny name" too. Living in such a red state and having had the words "unAmerican" pressed upon people like me with unapologetic liberal leanings, listening to this unknown state senator speak about America and Americans with inclusion as the defining message, I felt like someone had given my beloved flag back to me when Karl Rove-ian divisive politics tried to take it away from me and bully me. So while we're celebrating America's first African American President, many of us "hapas" feel some small ownership in celebrating a bi-ethnic President who struggled with identity in a similar way we did. We are happy for our African American brothers and sisters, and we can celebrate ourselves as well. Because an African American President named Barack Hussein Obama can possibly open the doors for us too. I cried like one of my own had won last night. Because he is one of our own in a really special way that all of us who are of mixed heritage can claim.

And by the way I just want to call it- I told everyone I knew after that beautiful 2004 key note speech that someday he was going to be president. Most people said,"WHOOO? What the hell kind of name is that, sounds weird!" And now anyone who remembers me saying that are eating their words. So I just had to brag about that too and rub it in- oh I love being right. :O)

I canvassed til an hour before the polls closed last night. I felt like I contributed to my country just by participating. I said to myself, whatever the outcome, I will never have to say that I didn't do my best so if my party doesn't win, I would at least not have any regrets. When I attended my first meeting back in June and heard our county coordinator talk numbers and say that we could really turn Florida blue, I thought,"Yeah right. Ok." But I hoped. And we did! And I was part of it! So tonight at our party I want to relish in that. But I look forward to working with my new found blue friends in finding some small ways to be purple because everyone who I spoke with when I phonebanked and canvassed: Republican, Democrat, Green, Independents said the same thing. That they were sick and tired of the divided atmosphere we're living in.

I was there

2008-11-04T11:30:00.010-05:00

I don't need to tell anyone who doesn't live under a rock what day today is. I have been canvassing my behind off and you don't need to guess for whom. Yesterday I got maybe 3 hours of sleep and didn't think I was going to be able to do it one more day. I thought maybe if I'm so exhausted, I'll just phone bank for an hour until I'm tired. But after attending a rally with thousands of people giving positive vibes to each other, praying together, dancing together, and singing our National Anthem together, then hearing one of the best pep talks I could have ever been given, I was on a high energy for the rest of the day and was able to muster the power to keep the wheels turning. You can see from this picture what a great view I got to have and how close my position was from the podium.

As he worked the stage when it was over I yelled out as loud as I could, "Senator show me your handsome face!" Whether or not he heard, I don't know but everyone around started laughing and all hands went in the air holding cameras. So this was the only photo I got with him smiling and of course as ya'll can see the person in front of me was definitely taller than 4'11".

I'm going out again to canvass right now and make sure everyone who hasn't voted yet gets to the polls today. To the very last minute I'll be walking.

Everyone who hasn't voted yet please get out to the polls and vote. Whoever you support. It is such a privilege to be able to make our voices heard in this country that we shouldn't take for granted. Stand in line, bring a chair and some snacks, make friends with your fellow voters, do whatever you need to do. Just get there and VOTE!!!

My favorite lines from his stump rally speech has always been this one.

Little Pea and Jolly Green Giant

2008-11-02T13:48:00.004-05:00

Yesterday I showed up at my team leader's house expecting to canvass. She told me I was the only who wanted to and everyone else wanted to phone bank. I said, "I'll stick around and make calls with you guys in case anyone else shows up that I can convince to come with me because I don't like and won't canvass alone. I was by myself yesterday and I didn't feel safe." A man sitting on the couch looked up and said, "If you need a partner, I suppose I can go with you." Then he stood up. And he was frikin' 6'9", OK? Yeah. I'm 4'11". Obviously I felt safe. What a sight we were walking through our town. People opened their doors when we knocked and for a second just looked at us like we were from the circus or some kind of Halloween comedy group. But it made it easier for us to talk to people because they seemed to want to know how in the world we even knew each other. So if anyone happened to look out their windows yesterday and noticed a freakishly tall man walking around with a freakishly small woman carrying a clipboard and waving to people, that was us.

I know I brag all the time about my freakish strength that enables me to pick up my tall 6'2" husband and carry him around for a few minutes. No way in hell I could have picked up this guy. Not even on steroids.

Today I am exhausted from all my canvassing and need a big rest. I feel guilty about it as it is crunch time but I'm dead tired in my bones. I feel like I've walked a million miles. I'll be back on the trail tomorrow, so again guys, if I knock on your door, be nice. Offer me some Gatorade. Or some painkillers. Whatever.

Busy Bee Random

2008-10-28T22:00:00.003-05:00

-Yesterday I accomplished the impossible. I convinced a Republican to vote for Obama. Yes you read that correctly. I even drove him to early vote. I also convinced him to vote no on amendment 2 which discriminates against gay couples (and actually would negatively affect more heterosexual couples who live together and common law couples than gays so I'm not sure how it even got on the ballot). Can you guys believe it? Uh Huh. You're welcome.

-We're looking for a new apartment. There's nothing wrong with this one except for the fact that I'm getting sick of walking up and down several flights of stairs with groceries and/or a dog. Plus electricity costs a damn fortune up here. It's also drafty and with winter creeping in, I'm not in the mood to freeze my behind off again. We're in no hurry though and we're both very specific about what we're looking for. I need lots of windows, a kitchen with plenty of counter space, and my own walk in closet. Mr.Pea requires a fire place, tile floors instead of carpet, and a big porch. We both agree we want a lower price too but that goes without saying. We might end up in a 1/1 if it's nice enough. This idea uneases me a bit as I've hinted at you guys before about my loathe to share a bathroom with him and especially a closet. If my marriage unfolds after we move into a 1/1, you guys will know why.

-I went for coffee with my nephew and we passed by my very first apartment. It was in a first floor of an old house that honestly was 37 steps(I counted) from the beach. The place was drafty, salty, made scary 'old house' noises at night, and the hot water didn't work if someone else in the building was using the outdoor shower but oh how I loved that apartment. The guy who had lived there before painted the walls a soft pale aqua and I remember my gauzy curtains billowing every evening. I had shells all over the place(but no shark teeth as that beach doesn't produce any) and books galore. I rode my bike to work on the beach when the tide was low and drank tea every night on the front porch to the sound of my bamboo windchimes. I was also a hop, skip, and a jump from my favorite coffee shop (which is still there even though Starbucks moved nearby a couple years ago) and a couple skips more from the library. (My dad was particularly pleased about the police station located one block away in case any psychomen tried anything funny with his daughter.) I can't comment on any of the resteraunts since I was too damn poor to eat at any of them. I never had any money. I didn't have a car. My fridge was always sparse, my phone was always being shut off and I was always by myself(because did I mention that I never had any money? Oh yeah I already did. Well I'll just say it again anyway, I was always broke!). But I remember being so happy in that cozy little apartment and wanting to live there for the rest of my life. I'm not sure why but it makes me happy to see that who ever resides there now, kept my sun sticker in the window and happy face I painted on the mail box.

-My allergies are driving me insane. I don't get stuffy nose. I get the bloody-murder-painful sore throat and ears. It's the worst in the mornings when the air is dry. Zyrtec sort of works. Only sort of though.

-My endocrinologist had her baby. The one who told me I couldn't have kids until she said it was ok. I know already told you guys about this but I'm feeling particularly jealous so I though I should mention it again. Anyway her office called me today and said I needed to get some blood drawn this week and suggested I get a flu shot just in case I end up having more cancer crap to do. I'll get the flu shot but if they suggest I need radioiodine again I'm going to say hell no. Which really means can I just put it off a few more months because I was enjoying not having to see them.

I haven't been leaving comments lately, I know. I've been busy and lazy- can you say that in a sentence and still make sense? Ya'll know what I mean. Anyway, you'll see me soon and more often, I promise.

I'm feel like tattle-telling

2008-10-21T16:36:00.011-05:00

Because someone needs to hear about this and there was no one around to whom I could bitch about it.

There are very little things I despise in this world more than pollution. I realize some pollution can't be avoided. But when I see people leave their garbage all over MY beach and flick their cigarettes out the car window(I mean, we're only driving GASOLINE-FILLED vehicles) I make sure to give them the evil eye, if they happen to be looking my way. Last week the wind was blowing a ton of seaweed from the Sargasso Sea and with it all the crap people must be throwing off their boats or dumping on their beaches. Nasty people.

I first encountered this bottle.

At first I got excited because maybe there's a message in it....maybe I was wrong. Upon closer inspection I notice it said Havana Club on it. Does this mean it floated here all the way from Cuba? Is there such a drink that can be bought here in the US called Havana Club? I just want to pretend the answer is no because at least then this is pollution I can maybe get excited about.

More bottles with no messages inside.....

Someone's big gulp.

And the cherry on top was this nasty shoe. I did not find it's mate.

If you see the people who did this, you tell them I'm not very happy with them right now because I hate cleaning up after people.

Vlog the vote. Makin' History :O)

2008-10-20T14:41:00.009-05:00

I voted today!
I felt all "historical" so I had to make a video. I ended up having to do another take when I realized I was holding my camera the wrong way. Typical....

Here is my message(s) to the world:

Oops. Take two:

And here is my ballot. I encourage everyone to do the same whoever you vote for.

Random is as Random does

2008-10-17T12:46:00.005-05:00

-I got an email inviting me to a high school reunion. My 15th year high school reunion. Well, well, well. It's pretty odd to get an invitation in October for an event that is going to happen in June but I suppose it;s like a wedding invite where you need to plan around. I'm feeling pretty indifferent about it since I already keep in touch with the people I had wanted to and frankly don't care one way or another to hear about the rest. High school was for me as with anyone, shitty most of the time with a few really great memories. I probably can't fit back into my cheerleader uniform but I was never a huge fan of the school colors anyway. I'm not going to go and I'm not exactly sure why I should feel bad about it since everyone I've told about it says,"No! No! You should really go." It's not so much that I'm LOATHE to go, it's just I don't see the point, there's not going to be anyone there I'm dying to see and since I moved back here, I run into just about everybody anyway. Do you disagree?

-Confession: I accidentally ran over some one's newly paved driveway the other day on my bicycle. Really though, not much harm done because the pave guy(I don't know what the job title was but he was nice to me) was able to fix it since it wasn't completely dry. Still though, I felt bad about it. Absolve me Internets.

-Um. Last week while I was looking for shark teeth, this guy came up to me bragging about his find. That was fine. But when he started with his lectures and instructions about how wrong I'm going about it I had to shut him down by reaching into my pouch pocket. My smallest one was bigger than his biggest one. Does size matter? Absolutely when you've got some jerk in your face telling you what to do and talking out of his ass. I hate when men do that to me, actually everyone does this to me. Just because I'm small and smiley, I must be stupid and in need of guidance. I wrote about this before, small people of the world, you know what I'm talking about. You guys know my shark teeth prowess, I don't need to tell you guys about it.

-Speaking of shark teeth hunting, I wonder how I must look to people who may happen to look out the window and spot me. Big floppy hat, green bathing suit, pink flip flops. Yellow pouch worn sideways that my husband makes fun and says makes me look like a crossing guard. Eyes furtively looking around, head down, shoulders crunched, staggering like a drunk person, gleefully giggling with every find and quickly putting in my bag before anyone sees because I'm stingy like that. Oh and don't forget my pepper spray conspicuously clipped to my bag so as to warn Psychoman if he decides to try it. Or do I look like Psychoman?

-The other day my sister said this to me:

Her: My gawd! You went to the beach again? What the hell, Angel how many shark teeth do you need?

Me: Wellll, it's just that.....low tide was at 1.... and ...and... and the North wind is picking up so I thought...

~~~pause~~~~(defiantly) well guess what?! I'm going again tomorrow!

Her: You're going to drive yourself blind girl. You need to calm down.

Me: SO?!

Her: Didn't you just go Monday? What do you do with all those shark teeth- put them in a damn bowl and sit there whispering,"mine mine all mine?"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~LONG PAUSE~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Me: SO!!!!?

Yeah. It's that important to me.

Great White!!

2008-10-15T10:52:00.003-05:00

I think.

And two Tiger Shark teeth. These are the two species I'm always really happy to find because they are the most difficult, at least for me.

I'm particularly impressed it with because it still has ridges.

(BTW my hand is greasy-lookin because I just put on more sunscreen)

Blue Canvassing in Red Territory(or so I thought)

2008-10-13T18:05:00.017-05:00

Saturday I went canvassing for the very first time. I had shied away from volunteering to canvass because I live in the darkest, blood Red section of Florida. In fact I was actually a little scared of my safety when I saw how nasty, and ok I'll just say it right out, RACIST supporters seem to be comfortable enough to get lately.(It's actually worse than what's been shown on CNN-don't believe me, just look on youtube) When I heard that someone had yelled,"Kill him," at a rally in Florida, I wanted to apologize on behalf of the state of Florida. I had visions of some crazy person chasing me down with a pitch fork because I was campaigning for "that one." Mind you, I have nothing against republicans, in fact, my whole family and one of my closest friend have Rs on their voter registration card. And I'm in NO way saying that republicans are racist, of course they aren't. Racists are racist, it's a simple as that. (I never heard anyone yell death threats at the Obama rally that I went to a few weeks ago. ) But I grew up in the South. Biracial, in the South. And I love the South and I love Southerners but as a woman, who's half Asian, I can tell you guys some stories about some of the stuff I had/still have to put up with. So it would be safe to assume that an Asian girl canvassing on behalf of "that(black) one" whatever the political affiliation, might be a little nervous. At any rate any Democrat would not be very enthusiastic about canvassing in Republican territory. I did it anyway. Actually my team leader told me that we outnumber Republicans in my county but we've just not been as vocal until recently. Whatever the outcome, I'd like for all of us in my community to just accept the fact that we don't all agree on everything, and there's nothing wrong with that.

So you guys would be happy to know that my experience was a really good one. Just about every door we knocked on was happy to see us and those who were not, didn't chase us away with pitchforks. And the people who were happy to see us acted as if they had been in hiding and were happy to be discovered. It was as if they were being intimidated by their neighbors to just shut up and take it because they were outnumbered, actually no it wasn't as if, it was. So they were all so excited to see friendly faces. Most of our house calls were senior citizens(it is Florida) and wanted to talk issues with us but spoke in hushed voices. When they did this I told them loudly,"No. Let your voice be heard, this is your community too. You're not a second class citizen just because you're blue in the red zone. You would be surprised how many of us there are, I have 7 pages here full of people to visit, almost all Democrats. There's no reason we should all remain quiet. " One lady wanted to make copies so that she could make some new friends but of course I can't disturb anyone's privacy. One old guy raised his fist when we told him who we were and said,"Yeah!!Yeah!! Go young people!" Some couples offered us cookies and told us they were proud of us. Another was worried about us and said,"Don't let anyone see what you're doing, you guys are gonna get yelled at or something. We had our signs run over." I said,"Let them see us. I want them to know we're here. And I will smile at them and flirt and win them over too." They liked that. One lady expressed concern over his middle name being Hussein because she really liked his ideas before that. I told her my middle name was Marie but that didn't make me the Virgin Mary, she laughed at that and asked for a ride to the polls. Another couple was still in their bathrobes and was embarrassed about the fact that they slept so late(it was only 10:30) but they had just started taking a dance class the night before. How cute is that? I thought about my Grandparents a lot. I don't even know what their party affiliation was, I know my Grandma was a huge fan of Reagan. Huge. I wonder if they would approve of my volunteering and if they would be proud of me.

The next day, I went to the pharmacy to pick up a prescription. On my way in, some guy made a smartass comment about my Obama teeshirt. Honestly I can't even tell you what he said, I wasn't even paying attention because I was thinking about all those people whose homes I visited and again understood why they felt the way they did. As I was standing in line, an old lady, who had heard, whispered to me,"I see you're wearing the right shirt." I said, "Say it louder ma'am, don't be shy. You're among friends here even if you didn't know it. I'm one of 90 volunteers." So she did and her husband did too. And they told me they already voted by absentee ballot. I told them I would be waving signs near the library and all over the beach next week so if they see me, to beep.

Phone banking, I'll still do, especially since the people I called yesterday didn't even know and never heard of early voting. But the human connection was better. It's nicer to see a smiling face knocking on your door than to hear your phone ring during dinner time, I think. And like I said, whatever happens in this election, I hope I have contributed in some small way to opening a dialogue or at least gave a feeling of belonging to the people I met who felt like outsiders in their own neighborhood. Needless to say, that night I called my team leader and told her to count me in to canvass at every date we have left.

It's getting too serious lately, have a laugh at my expense

2008-10-11T18:56:00.012-05:00

I don't mind.

Recently I was asked what my MOST EMBARRASSING moment of my life was. I thought, my word, do you have a few days cuz that's how long it's gonna take since I have so many. If you've been reading here for a long time(those of you who are still left) you might think it was the time I accidentally felt myself up in front of some prisoners. Um. Yeah. This kind of stuff always happens to me, be it my fault or not. But believe me, this does not even top my mortification list. I have one just as bad, maybe even worse- you decide.

The summer I lived in my very first apartment, I was 19 and I had a job at a fancy pants chocolateir shop. This place was so expensive and sheesheefoofoo, they did not even have price tags or any indicator for how much things costs. They just assume anyone shopping there has so much damn money, they know it's expensive chocolate so they don't need to ask(those were my manager's exact words). I loved making the chocolate and dipping the strawberries, pretzels all that stuff- I did everything. I put all the assortment boxes together and wrapped the solid forms with plastic wrap and ribbons. I even made ice cream. And truffels, OMG the truffels ok? The best perk was that I could eat anything I wanted as long as I didn't take it out of the store. Yes, you guys, an all you can eat chocolate buffet. I hearted this job. I didn't even mind that they made me wear a really ugly hot pink hat. Because it was such a small store, I worked mostly alone and I had my own key to the place so I could close up the shop on my own after weekday evening shifts and open the store on my Sunday shifts. I was the only girl employee. And one thing started to bother me about being the only girl employee. After about 2 months I started to notice my coworkers were not cleaning up after themselves and leaving HUGE, DISGUSTING messes for me to clean up at the end of their shifts. Anyone out there ever clean up gobs of dried chocolate stuck to the floor? Not to mention the squished strawberries and nuts mixed in. It's not a whistle while you work kind of task. It took a while but, I finally got up the nerve to do something about it. I complained about it and my manager said that it's always the responsibility of the person who closes to clean up. I said,"No. When I work in the mornings, you guys always have a clean area when you come in because I clean up after myself. Fair is fair. I'm not every body's wife or mommie, I shouldn't have to clean up other people's sloppiness. Of course the store needs to be clean at close up, but this is food we're making here when it comes down to it and this room is disgusting." This was pretty bold of me, because I am a really passive person who's always too shy to rock the boat but that's how bad it was. But for a while it was ok. Then they got lazy again and this time I was ignored and treated like a whiny little girl. It started to make me feel more timid to even say anything at that point cuz I needed that job. So the day I knew I had another job lined up I went to eat lunch with my sister and was working myself up into such a state talking about that I finally said," that's it! I'm not going back there, not even to give those jerks a two weeks notice!" Of course because of how belittling he was to me the last time, I was too timid to just call my manager and say I quit, I'm not coming back. So me and my sister came up with this wonderful plan for her to call him and say, " Angel had to leave the country for a family funeral, she doesn't know when she'll be back." So she did. Big problem. I needed to pick up my last pay check and give them my key. Of course once again, I'm too chicken to do it because I just couldn't take his smartass smirk PLUS I'm supposed to be out of town remember? So my sister volunteers to do it for me but I have to come with her and hide in the car. We were too stupid at the time to park in the parking lot behind the building because my genius plan was just to crouch down in the car so no one could see me. My sister went in and came out empty handed because she said they refuse to give a check to any other person but me. So we're sitting there arguing back and forth because I wanted her to go back in there and demand my check as my sister and tell them all to screw themselves because obviously someone like me who crouches in a car so as not to be seen doesn't have enough nerve. We're still arguing about what to do next and I hear a tap tap on my window. There's my now former boss standing next to the car with my check. I said,"oh," and rolled down the window and he gave it to me not speaking. We then slowly drove away in hu-mil-i-a-tion. I can still see his smartass smirk in the rear view mirror to this day.

Yep. Big lesson learned: never lie in the place of sticking up for yourself. I should have easily sauntered in and told every one of those jerks where to go.

I've been busy, Phone banking

2008-10-05T20:46:00.004-05:00

I participated in my second phone bank today. Mostly no one answered but there were a few friendly supporters. Last time I was able to convince 2 people who were undecided to vote for Obama and sign up 2 volunteers but none today. I got yelled at a couple times too. It's kind of hard to grit your teeth and say, "Oh I'm sorry I disturbed you, thank you for your time and have a nice day." But I do. In my sweetest voice. Gosh! How hard is it to say, "I don't want to talk to you, goodbye." Next time a telemarketer calls me, I'm going to be nicer.

There's one woman who I keep thinking about. She was around my mother's age and told me she was undecided. When I asked her what issue she was the most concerned about, she started to cry and said,"Jobs. I got laid off a month ago." I didn't know what to say. I felt like an intruder. At this point I wasn't about to go off with a list of reasons why she should vote one or another while this poor woman was crying- ok I am a human being. I just told her I was sorry and that I hope things get better for her. I said I understood how she felt, that I still have hope and not to give up. I'm not sure why she didn't just hang up on me for I would have, but she wanted to talk to me. She told me about how hard it's been for her lately and how stressed out she was. She asked me about my family, where I was from and how old I was. She was surprised, she said, because I sounded so much younger and that the youth in my voice gave her hope. We ended up talking for about 15 minutes because she wanted to know why I was supporting Obama and told me not to read from a script. Of course, I wasn't. At the end of our conversation she told me she would pray for me. She said she was still undecided and would make her decision after watching the debates but because of my phone call, she was leaning a little and she actually thanked me. Obviously I'm glad about the leaning but most of all I'm glad that I was comforting to her. I can't even believe that a total stranger with so many problems of her own would want to pray for me. This makes up for all the mean people who yelled and hung up on me.

(I'll be canvassing for the first time this weekend so if I come to your house, be nice to me. Offer me some m&ms.)